You Dont Have to Hide
by hippiehappy
Summary: Bella believes in the simple things. She works hard, lives alone, does her best to get by. What happens when she meets the stunning Edward Cullen-while trapped in an elevator? Its Hollywood meets hometown. What can they teach each other about love?AH
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! This is my first Twilight fanfic, I'm just going to have some fun with it. I really hope you enjoy it. Hopefully it will turn into the incredibly sweet romance I'm cooking up in my head. PLEASE REVIEW! Thanks so much! **

**(I don't own Twilight. As much as I'd love to own Edward Cullen.)**

**BPOV**

I listened to my brown leather boots scuff across the pavement as I started the hike up to my apartment building. I didn't mind walking. It was September in Forks and I could smell the change in the air, I could feel it wrap around me with a new crispness. It was my favorite time of year. Time to pull out flannel pajamas and my favorite denim jeans.

I was finally living on my own. Charlie, God love him, as much as he had insisted I could always stay with him, I knew it was time to find my own place when he and Sue Clearwater hit it off. I was just finishing my senior year at the local community college when Sue made her appearances more frequent at the house. It made my heart warm to see my father turn into a shy gentleman around her. His eyes came to life when she came into the room, and his hands constantly sought the warmth of hers.

It was so good to see him so happy. It gave me hope to know that real love could happen twice in a lifetime - for both of them. When I graduated from college, I knew it was time to give my dad the space he and Sue needed. I wanted this happiness for him. I didn't want him to worry about me.

I had tied down a job working as an art therapist for kids with special needs. Every day I made the same trek down to the Rec center near the middle of town. I lived for my work. It didn't pay much, and most people didn't consider it to be a career, but there was something about it that filled me. Most of the children I worked with were autistic and struggling for a way to communicate and express themselves. Art seemed to be the answer.

I had formed close relationships with the children and with their families. It was this aspect of living in a small town that I was in love with. When I was first living by myself, I was thrilled to open my door to these families, bringing me plates of hot food during the holidays and checking in on me. People knew who I was. I was Bella Swan. I cared about this town, and they cared about me.

Life was simple and beautiful. I liked it this way. Some would look at the life I had made for myself and wonder how I got by in my tiny apartment, living in what most people considered to be the slum-side of town, without a car, and sometimes without heat. But I managed, and I was happy. Lonely sometimes, but fulfilled.

I was smiling to myself as I came closer and closer to Moss Apartments - home sweet home. I was flicking through the digital camera I had borrowed from the Rec Center, looking at the kids' latest art work. I thought of all the progress Noah had made, the spirit in Molly's finger paints, and the sweet smile little Aiden now used to light up the room after months of hiding in a corner. My feet knew the steps of the apartment building by heart. My bag of art supplies rattled slightly as I hopped each one and made my way to the elevator without even an upward glance. A familiar voice called my name.

"Bella!" came the warbling voice of my neighbor, Mrs. Faye. She was an elderly woman, short and round, with the smile of an angel and full pink cheeks. She sat in her wheel chair with the posture of a queen and warmth in her eyes as she called to me. I immediately smiled as I turned to greet her. I was alarmed to see her aid wasn't with her.

"Mrs Faye! What are you doing all by yourself? Where did Annie go?"

Annie was Mrs. Faye's live in nurse. She was prone to disappearing for a cigarette and leaving Mrs. Faye trapped in her wheel chair and without help. _The carelessness of that woman! _ I thought to myself. Several times in my first year living at Moss I had found Mrs. Faye by herself in the lobby or just out of reach from the bathroom in her apartment. It was how we had first met. Mrs. Faye's mind was in and out of the present, so thankfully, she usually didn't notice when Annie had abandoned her.

"Annie? Oh I don't know my dear. Arthur and I were having tea when I lost my green glass earring....I can't imagine where it's run off to...." she bent her neck down to look around for an earring I knew she wouldn't find. Arthur was her husband, who had been dead for nearly 15 years. The green glass earrings had been a gift from him on their wedding night. Often when I came over to check on her in the morning she would ask me if I had seen them.

"Why don't we get in the elevator Mrs Faye. I'll help you look for your earring when we get to your apartment." I said softly, smiling down at her sweet face. We took good care of each other. We kept each other company, living alone the way we did. I cursed Annie in my head for being such an awful excuse for a competent nurse.

"Oh would you my dear?! That would be lovely. I don't know what I will tell Arthur if I can't find them...." she wrung her hands with those last words, her head still bent towards the ground, searching, as I wheeled her towards the ancient elevator. It broke my heart to see her search for pieces of a past she could never get back. As we made our way into the building's ancient elevator I heard a new sound rise above Mrs. Faye's mumbling. There were loud foot steps coming towards us. I figured someone was running to catch the elevator.

Without looking up, I situated Mrs. Faye's wheel chair in the elevator and instinctively reached out to catch the door for this frantic stranger. I looked out into the lobby to see the man sprinting towards us. His auburn hair blew in the cold fall breeze created by the closing doors behind him. His green eyes were filled with panic as he struggled to get to our elevator. Just behind him, outside the front doors, was a mob of shouting men with giant cameras and flashing bulbs. _Paparazzi_? _We're in Forks for Christssake! Who is this man_?

I pulled Mrs. Faye's chair protectively closer towards me and stood in front of her, shielding her from the mysterious, scrambling man. He flew into the elevator and clutched the wall, his momentum diminished. He turned quickly, reaching past me and jamming buttons until he found the one that closed the heavy doors.

I felt like I had seen him before. But _where? _ He was an absolutely stunning human being of that I was certain - and I had barely seen his face yet. He was bent over, hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. His jeans stretched over his lean legs...his broad shoulders moving in time with his breath under his jean jacket...

"Thank you," he breathed, turning his face in my direction. He was utterly gorgeous. His chiseled features weren't harsh like most male models and actors. There was a softness to his face that made me feel warm. His green eyes were mesmerizing. I nodded my head in response, unable to form words.

I was suddenly frantic. I had no idea who he was. How embarrassing. I had to start keeping up with the times. I hadn't been to the movies in ages with a budget like mine. I didn't read gossip magazines when I was content with my extensive library of books lining my tiny apartment. _Nerd_.

"Bella honey, I'm terribly thirsty..." I heard Mrs. Faye sigh. I snapped to the present and immediately check the pocket in the back of her chair for a bottle of water. I opened the velcro pouch, intent on not staring at this stranger like a drooling fan. I fumbled around, looking for a water bottle. Clumsily, I dropped the contents of the pocket and cursed under my breath. I picked up a pack of Annie's cigarettes, and Faye's pills. Lying underneath her water bottle was Annie's stack of magazines. I stopped for a moment and picked up the one on top, hoping that maybe it would give me a clue as to who this breathtaking being in front of me was.

Sure enough, the face on the cover of Annie's latest entertainment magazine matched that of the stranger beside me. I _knew_ I had seen him before. The water bottle rolled out of my grasp, only to be caught by the stranger beside us, who kindly handed it to Mrs. Faye. Before I could speak, the lights overhead in the elevator flickered and floor beneath us lurched violently. _Crap_. The red emergency light flashed and I came to the horrifying realization. I was trapped in an elevator with none other than Hollywood's rising movie star, _Edward Cullen_.


	2. Chapter 2

**EPOV**

My feet could not carry me fast enough. At the first flash of a camera I was gone. I realized as I picked up speed that this was a stupid idea - I was giving them excitement they wanted - but I couldn't stop now. I was at my wits end.

Shooting for the most recent of the slew of romantic comedies I had been in, had just ended. With all the chaos building up to the movie's release, I was yearning for some time to myself. I still could not wrap my head around the idea that the past couple of years had turned me into some kind of "heartthrob." How does one go from starring in a toothpaste commercial to becoming "sex bomb?" When I looked at myself in the mirror I saw no bomb of sex. I saw the pale, purple circles under my eyes from nights of restless sleep, I saw the weariness of a life being lived under the weight of an incorrigible media. I saw the emptiness in my own eyes. I saw me. Alone. Empty.

As soon as press conferences were under wraps, I headed to Forks. My family owned a house on the outskirts of town. The small population, the quiet woods, the solitude - I needed it. My father had bought the place as a sort of reverie for our family. After my sister Alice hit it off in the fashion world, we were all automatically dragged into the public eye. I suppose Alice's success is where my career started. Our house in forks was an escape. And I was well on my way there before all hell broke loose.

My agent had dropped me off at nicest hotel he could find in Forks. He was reluctant to let me go, insisting that I needed to keep up appearances. Did he not understand that was exactly what I was trying to avoid? He left me the number for the nearest Rent-a-Car and drove off in a huff, his blackberry never leaving his left hand. I was so eager to be away from that. Even when I felt lonely, I was never actually _alone_. Now, finally, I would be.

My time at the hotel was short lived. I had approached the check in desk, ignored the wide eyed female clerk and asked politely for a room. Her hands shook as she took my credit card, he smile plastered to her face in disbelief. I would never get used to this. Why someone would look at me so adoringly without even knowing me is beyond my understanding. I had been avoiding her eyes when I noticed her expression become an anxious one, and her smile became even more plastic. She shifted he weight, cocking her hip and smoothing her hair. She was looking behind me, eyes darting nervously back and forth.

As soon as I turned I was blinded by the flash of a camera. _Damnet_. Someone must have followed me. Without bothering to grab my credit card, I was off. Blinded by utterly overwhelming frustration, I marched swiftly out of the front doors of the hotel lobby. All the while, I was followed by an ever expanding crowd of onlookers. One photographer had become three, and soon there were more. I could see they weren't from around Forks. Their black leather jackets and pushy attitudes made their numbers seem even greater. My agent must have hired them to "keep an eye" on me. If I refused to keep up appearances, he would do it for me. I made a mental note to fire him as soon as I returned from Forks.

When fresh air found me, I sprinted. "Edward! Edward! Where are you running?!" They shouted after me. The bastards were used to hot pursuit, so I would have to be smart if I were to escape. I looped around the back of the hotel into the parking lot, weaving around cars and running as if my life depended on it. If they followed me to my family's house, it would be a disaster.

My heart was pounding in my chest with sheer adrenaline. I looked behind me to see 4 paparazzi trying to keep up. Three had given up and were now resting on parking cars and cursing to themselves. If I could lose these four, I might be able to make it. I found myself running up hill and noticed the change in scenery.

These streets were mostly deserted. Sleeping bags lined several small alleys and corners. Once or twice I saw the skeletons of cars behind old brick buildings. Few people were out and those who were, seemed not to notice my struggle. It was a strange part of town. I wasn't familiar with this side of Forks at all. But then again, my upbringing hadn't necessarily helped that.

The four photographers were a good distance behind me, but still too close for my liking. I turned a corner sharply and head through the doors of the largest building on the block. I briefly caught the sign as I wrenched open the doors - Moss Apartments. I saw the open doors to the elevator ahead of me and didn't think twice before flying through them. I vaguely registered a pair of slender arms holding the door for me. I slammed into the elevator and turned to the row of buttons, jabbing them frantically until the doors finally closed. _ I was safe_.

It was then I took in my surroundings. I was doubled over panting, trying to catch my breath, when my eyes fell on a pair of small, beat up leather boots and enormous wheels. I turned my head slightly, and choked out a "Thank you," in their direction. When I was finally able to control my breathing, I stood up straight and dropped my bag to the floor beside me.

"Bella, honey I'm terribly thirsty..." came a voice from the wheel chair. I turned to look at my new company. The woman who had spoken was one of the most adorable old ladies I had ever seen. She was obviously terribly lost. Her neck craned downward as she searched the floor. The mention of her thirst seemed to take the back burner in her thoughts as she searched the floor with her eyes.

I looked to see the girl standing beside her. She was staring at me slightly, but her expression was unlike that of the clerk at the hotel. She wore a face of confusion and embarrassment. Her cheeks flushed as she snapped out of it and knelt to rummage through the back pocket of the wheel chair. While her focus was elsewhere, I examined her face. She was strikingly beautiful. She was so small, her complexion flawless, and her deep brown eyes were limitless in depth. Even as she focused on a minor task of finding some water for her companion, I could see there was much more to this girl than what lie on the surface. I wished to hear her speak. To know the thoughts behind those eyes.

Her long brown hair swept down her back, a natural wave to it that most girls would envy. She dropped the contents of the pouch onto the floor. I heard her mutter something under her breath as she hurried to pick it up. Then it happened. I spotted it before she did. A magazine with my face on it. I watched as she made the connection. Suddenly I was afraid. I wished I was someone else. Anyone else. Someone who could ask this beautiful girl to dinner without a second thought. Someone who could have a normal conversation that didn't involve an interrogation from infatuated fans. Someone who could be normal.

The water bottle rolled towards me. I scooped it up in my hands and handed it to the woman in the wheel chair with a smile. My body tensed, waiting for the question..._"Are you...Edward Cullen!!!??"_ But the question never came. Because before any of us could speak, the lights flickered, and the ground beneath my feet lurched, causing me to stumble backward and grasp the railing. When the sudden, violent movement had ceased, the red emergency lights flashed, illuminating our confined space with the color.

The girl let out a heavy sigh and without missing a beat, began shoving the magazines back into the wheel chair pocket. The elderly woman didn't seem phased by the elevator's movement at all. She looked up at me with wide innocent eyes and said, "Excuse me dear, have you seen my green glass earrings?"

I looked to the girl for a translation. She smiled to herself and came to her feet. I took her in fully now. Crouching behind the wheel chair I did not see her perfect figure, or her long, lovely legs. For the first time she looked me in the eye. There was a humbleness on her face that made me suddenly feel at ease.

"Mrs. Faye, when we get to your apartment, we'll look for your earrings. I promise." the girl said quietly. There was a patience in her voice that made me smile. Her eyes traveled to the flashing red light and then back to me. "Looks like we're stuck." She didn't seem frazzled by the event in any way. It took me by surprise. Had this happened in LA, the air would have been filled with the angry tension of agents and publicists, and the heightened anxiety of the people around them. I could only guess that perhaps this wasn't the first time this had happened.

"Does this happen often?" I asked. I had no where to be, but her strange serenity made me curious. She turned to me with a weak smile and shrugged.

"Its an old building. It happens - "

"Who are you?" the elderly woman said abruptly. She looked me over as if noticing me for the first time. Panic overwhelmed me. How should I answer? _The truth Edward, the truth._

"My name is Edward." I said simply with a smile. I shook her hand. She felt so fragile. But the warmth in her smile was contagious.

"Well, Edward, I'm Mrs. Faye. Such a handsome man, Bella!" she said, turning to the girl beside her, searching for approval. I too, looked for approval in the girl's eyes. I was not disappointed as I saw her blush when she locked eyes with me. "He reminds me of my Arthur." The girl reached down and held Mrs. Faye's hand warmly. With her free hand, she reached to shake mine. The feel of her hand in mine took me by surprise. She was so soft, so delicate, so breakable. Yet, she held my hand firmly and her eyes never parted from mine.

"Hi Edward, I'm Bella Swan."


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews, keep em coming! The more feedback I get, the sooner I'll update! Peace and Love.**

**BPOV**

"Hi Edward, I'm Bella Swan." I said as he held my hand. His fame did not frighten me. I barely knew who he _was_ I was so behind with the times. His devastatingly good looks on the other hand...now_ that_ had my heart pounding.

"Bella." he said softly with a nod. His eyes were locked on mine. _Get it together Bella, he's a human being not a God...although with a face like that... Stop staring! Focus. Get Mrs. Faye out of here and up to her apartment._

I pressed the emergency call button. I knew this drill. I heard the speaker scratch noisily as it patched down to the main offices.

"Who is it?" rasped a voice through the speakers.

"Hey Gloria, it's Bella,"

"Oh hey Bells! You stuck up there again?"

"Yeah, you know me. I'm a magnet for bad luck. Could you call Barty and see if he could get us moving again?"

"Yeah sure. I'm gonna warn you though, it might be a bit of a wait. Barty's been drinkin' again. Let me see if I can go find him."

"Thanks Gloria."

Barty was Moss Apartments' handy man. He was in his early sixties, a sweet guy really. He tried his best to take good care of the old building, but it was a big job. So he drank once in a while...I never blamed him. Although his timing was usually awful. I knew we would be stuck here for a while as soon as Gloria told me she had to go and find him. He was pretty good at getting lost when he was drunk. I turned to Edward with apologies in my eyes.

"I'm really sorry about this. I hope you won't be late to..wherever you were running."

"It's not your fault," He assured me with a crooked smile that made my breath hitch in my throat. "Besides, I haven't got anywhere to be. In fact, I'd much rather be in here than out there." Did he just _blush_?

He stretched casually and found a seat on the floor. I followed suit and sat beside him, a safe, polite distance away, tugging at my skirt.

"I would rather be in here too if I were being chased by an angry mob with cameras." I said. There was no use avoiding the subject. I couldn't pretend I didn't see the mob of camera men behind him.

"Ah, you noticed that did you?" he winced. He looked nervous. I didn't want him to be. I tried to reassure him with my eyes that he was safe here. Even if we were in fact stuck in an elevator.

"Seems to me you need a place to hide." I laughed softly playing with the buckle on my boot. Suddenly I was wishing _I_ had a place to hide.

"Thats exactly why I came to Forks," he confessed. "It seems I can't hide here either."

Mrs Faye caught my attention as I watched her head droop towards her chest. I envied her. She could sleep anywhere, anytime. I, on the other hand, hardly ever got a good nights rest. I unwrapped the wool scarf from around my neck and bundled it up, making a makeshift pillow. I gently placed it under Mrs. Faye's head, leaning her back until she looked more comfortable.

"Her neck will hurt her when she wakes up..." I explained, anxious to fill the silence. "Her aid left her in the lobby...I usually take the stairs, but I didn't want to leave her. And now she's stuck in an elevator..." I knew I was rambling. I couldn't _shut up_. I felt so guilty that now Mrs. Faye was stuck in an elevator instead of safe in her apartment. And this beautiful stranger was turning me into an absolute idiot. "I have to get her upstairs and make sure she eats something...Barty -" I was spitting out fragments of thoughts, suddenly overwhelmed by the need to speak.

Before I could finish my sentence, I felt a warm hand on my arm and a soft squeeze.

"It'll be ok," Edward said beside me. His touch felt so natural, I felt my heart sink the tiniest bit when he pulled away. How silly of me. I refused to be star struck. _What is this guy doing to me?_ "Barty will have us moving in no time, I'm sure."

I smiled weakly back at him. I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks and I put a hand over my mouth - just in case anymore wandering thoughts decided to tumble out. I really had to pull myself together. We settled into silence. I heard him take a deep breath beside me and felt his eyes on my face.

"So," he started. His voice only shook slightly. When he spoke again, he had gained his composure and his velvet voice continued. "Bella Swan." he grinned at me. "It seems we have some time on our hands. Tell me about yourself."

I almost choked. This beautiful man wanted to know about _me_?

"W-what do you want to know?" I asked. I searched frantically in my head for something to say. There was so much to me, and yet in a moment's time with Edward Cullen, I couldn't think of a single thing to say.

"Well, you could start by telling me how you met Mrs. Faye here." he gestured to my dear old friend. He noticed my face soften at the mention of her name. "You seem to care for her very much."

"I do." I smiled, remembering the first time I met her. I realized he was waiting for me to speak. I started hesitantly, turning my body to face him. "I moved into the apartment next to her about a year and a half ago. She lives alone too. We keep each other company and check in on each other. Especially when her nurse goes M.I.A."

"You live_ here_ ..._alone_?" he asked. I detected a hint of surprise and even concern in his voice. Most people were surprised when I told them I lived alone. I remembered telling my best friend Angela that I was moving out. _ "Moss Apartments Bella? By yourself? You can't be serious."_ she had yelled disapprovingly into the phone.

"Yes." I said, turning back to Edward. His eyes were surveying the dingy old elevator skeptically. I hurried to explain. "I mean I know it doesn't look like much. But there are still good people here. Everybody knows each other. I have never felt unsafe. I mean granted it was a little scary at first, but I settled in alright."

"And Mrs. Faye?"

"Her children are grown and gone. Her husband, Arthur, died years ago. This place was what she could afford. Her kids are all over the map, but they pay for her live in nurse. Unfortunately, their taste isn't so great. I've found Mrs. Faye left alone more times than I can count." I frowned, my thoughts drifting to Annie. The smug little blonde nurse looked more like a play boy bunny. I stiffened as I imagined her meeting Edward. His eyes wouldn't miss her long beautiful hair, her perfect tan, her perfect body, or her over sized breasts. _What did I care_?

I snapped out of it, realizing I should probably stop talking and ask _him_ something.

"So, Edward Cullen in Forks?" _Ah what the hell. It was bound to come up somehow_. He laughed and dropped his head. I was afraid for a moment that he would lose his smile and look at me with annoyance. Instead he simply smiled at me and shook his head modestly, laughing quietly. To see his laughter made me feel at ease. I loosened up a a bit, sighing beside him. Feeling trust spark between us I decided to be honest.

"I have to confess, if I hadn't seen the cameras, or the magazines, I would have absolutely no idea who you were." I blushed, embarrassed. But he turned to me with wide green eyes and a surprised but happy grin on his face.

"You have no idea how glad I am to hear that." he said. His eyes fell to his hands and his expression changed. I could see him thinking to himself. His reflective gaze held an emotion I could not place. He looked as though he were almost in pain.

"But it makes me sound like I've been living under a rock!" I laughed, trying to lift his mood.

"Not it all. It makes you sound like a young woman with more important things in her life than trivial gossip magazines. And _that_ is something I admire, Bella." He smiled at me, his gaze firm. I shivered a little when he said my name. I could only smile at him like a little girl. He locked eyes with me again, his crooked grin erasing the worry that had been there before.

"So tell me," he said. "what do you do when your not saving the elderly and holding elevators for runaway celebrities?"

**Next chapter is on its way. I promise it will pick up. Stick with me :) R&R!**


	4. Chapter 4

**EPOV**

I selfishly entertained the thought of spending the entire day with Bella Swan, stuck in this dirty old elevator. Even with small conversation, she had me completely captivated. Her absolute beauty coupled with the depth of her eyes and the mystery behind her humble comments and modest gaze had me spinning. She left me wishing I could know her secrets, her inner workings - wishing I could read her mind. I felt absolutely ridiculous. I had no idea who she was. But somehow I wanted to.

I was being careful with my questions and conversation, not wanting to scare her away with my sudden interest. I could tell she was being careful too. I could see in her eyes that there was so much more to her polite, modest answers.

She took great care of Mrs. Faye, who had succumbed to sleep in her wheel chair. I had smiled as she started to ramble, glad to see that she was as nervous as I was. Her concerns were only for her companion, not at all for herself. Before I could stop myself I had touched her arm as a gesture of comfort, overwhelmed by a need to rescue her from worry. Also, by the need to touch her, to be connected to her, even if for only a brief moment.

She had looked baffled when I asked her about herself. Her guard was up, I could feel it. But her eyes were vulnerable, giving her away more than she would have preferred. So I started with a route she would be more comfortable with and asked her about Mrs. Faye. She immediately relaxed, and told me about her beloved neighbor.

I did a poor job of hiding my shock and concern when she revealed she lived alone. I remembered running into the building earlier that afternoon, noticing the state of the old place and the surrounding neighborhood. It certainly wasn't the nicest place to live. My head jumped to worse-case-scenarios involving robberies and drive-bys just like the movies. Although Bella assured me she didn't feel unsafe, I wasn't oblivious to the crime rate in Forks. I could tell she was choosing to believe in the good in all people. Much like Hollywood - that sort of kindness and trust could be more of a hinderance than a help. _And she's so small. So fragile._.._What if something happened to her?_

"So, Edward Cullen in Forks?"

I dropped my head and laughed. I laughed at myself for actually believing for even a split second that this question wouldn't come up.

"I have to confess, if I hadn't seen the cameras or the magazines, I would have absolutely no idea who you were." Color lit in her cheeks. She was embarrassed she hadn't known who I was. I felt a trust in her begin to form within me. I was glad she hadn't known. So, so glad. Because now I didn't have to hide. I understood when I looked at her that my fame was not my identity. I was simply a man, stuck in an elevator with a beautiful girl.

"You have no idea how glad I am to hear that." I thought of my life at home. Life under microscope. I thought of how limited my freedom truly was. I had never wanted it to be like this. I had other dreams.

"But it makes me sound like I've been living under a rock!" she exclaimed with a laugh.

"Not at all," I said, wishing to rid her of her unease. "It makes you sound like a young woman with more important things in her life than trivial gossip magazines. And _that_ is something I admire, Bella." I could not tear my eyes away from hers. I couldn't look away from the lovely shade of pink on her cheeks or the perfect shape of her lips.

I snapped out of it, trying desperately to get a grip.

"So tell me," I said. "What do you do when your not saving the elderly and holding elevators for runaway celebrities?"

She laughed. There was a new freedom in her laughter that gave me hope. Her guard was coming down a bit, slowly but surely.

"Too much." she giggled. "This elevator hold up is probably the universe's way of telling me to slow down." She was quiet again. I could see she was afraid to talk about herself. But I _wanted_ to know.

"Tell me?" I said quietly, softly coaxing more out of her. I moved my body ever so slightly closer to her. She turned her head to look me in the eye. She took a deep breath, eyes searching mine, looking for reassurance and trust. I held her gaze, hoping to give her what she was looking for. She must have found it because she slowly began to speak.

She told me about her job downtown, about her work as an art therapist. I could see her smiling to herself as she spoke of the children she worked with. There was pride and love in her eyes. I knew as she told me of them she was picturing their faces. I wished to see through her eyes, to see what made her so passionate about a job that most wouldn't give much merit to, but for her - was her life. In that moment I envied her. She had found what made her happy, she had found her purpose. I had yet to find mine.

"When I'm not at the Rec Center I'm here, checking in on Mrs Faye. Or home, checking in on my father. I guess it isn't a terribly exciting life, but its mine just the same. I'm happy."

I could tell she was self conscious. Did she really think I found her _boring_? How I wished I could tell her that she held my attention completely prisoner. I would surely scare her away.

"Your turn," she said with a smile. "What do you do when your not escaping paparazzi and dazzling the populace with your good looks?"

I burst out laughing. "I would hardly say I dazzle people."

"Well _I_ beg to differ." she said softly, looking at her hands and blushing furiously. My heart swelled in my chest. We caught each other's eyes and then looked away, our cheeks a matching shade of pink. I cleared my throat.

"I play piano." I admitted. Long before getting caught up in a world of box office hits and red carpet affairs I had dreamed of being a musician. "It keeps me sane when I'm not working. Makes me feel like I still have a choice."

"A choice?" she studied me carefully.

"Like acting isn't the only answer." I explained slowly, letting myself share this with her. "Makes me feel like I haven't completely lost sight of my other dreams even if I can't pursue them." Her face became serious as she locked her gaze firmly with mine. This time her hand came to rest on _my_ arm. Her touch made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. There was electricity between us.

"You _always_ have a choice, Edward. Always."

Her words echoed in my ears, filling me with a new sense of encouragement. Just the fact that she had said my _name_ made my heart pound. But knowing that this girl, this beautiful stranger believed in me, set it on fire.

After a moment, she let go. I could feel my skin cool from the absence of her touch. She seemed nervous again, as if she were restraining herself. She chose safe questions about music to break the intensity of the moment. I realized with delight, that she was just as bewildered by this connection between us as I was. And that meant she was feeling it as much as I was.

She asked me about music, beginning a conversation that flowed beautifully. I was blown away by how much music she knew, how much she listened to. She had heard of every one of my favorites and even recommended bands I hadn't heard of, classical pieces she thought I would like, and composers I hadn't heard of.

"Mrs. Faye is into the classics. You pick it up after a while." she explained, reading the look of surprise on my face.

All the walls built around her were beginning to fall. I had no idea how much time was passing, nor did I care. I felt my heart sink when the speakers sprang to life and Gloria's nasal voice jolted us out of our conversation and Mrs Faye out of her sound sleep.

"Bella honey? How you doin up there?"

Bella rose from the floor, pressing the button to speak into it while simultaneously coaxing Mrs. Faye to drink more water. I came to my feet also, stretching my legs.

"We're ok Gloria. Any luck finding Barty?"

"Yeah, you should be moving in a few minutes darlin'. So sorry about the wait."

I was suddenly filled with panic. _A few minutes_? Was that all the time I had left with Bella? I looked down at my watch, realizing that two and half hours had passed like ten minutes. It must be dark outside.

I hated the reality that as approaching sooner than I had expected. A reality that included leaving Bella Swan and making a long trek back to the hotel in the dark. A reality that included awaiting paprazzi. A reality that didn't include Bella. There were so many questions I wanted to ask her, so many things I wanted to tell her.

"Are we home yet Bella?" asked a drowsy Mrs. Faye. Bella smiled and tucked Mrs. Faye's shawl tighter around her shoulders.

"Almost." she said simply. Her eyes came to rest on mine as the elevator groaned to life beneath us. I could see the reluctance in her eyes too. She struggled to form words for a moment, debating with herself. Finally she asked, "Would you help me get her inside when we make it upstairs?"

"Of course!" I answered a little too quickly. The elevator dinged loudly as it stopped on the fifth floor and its doors cranked open. The strip of hallway before us was narrow and poorly lit. I could see a few of the bulbs lighting the way had burned out. As we passed doors I heard old Billie Holiday music playing from one side of the hall, children crying on the other, loud conversations and the static of a television set somewhere down the hall. The place seemed so sorrowful. I shuddered as I thought of Bella living here by herself. I was grateful to Mrs. Faye, even in her age and oblivion, that her innocence and sweetness shielded Bella from the hopelessness of this building.

We turned a corner and made it to Mrs. Faye's apartment. Bella quickly unlocked the door and wheeled her inside, flicking the lights on as she went. The place was _tiny_. There was a small sitting area, an even smaller kitchen, and a bathroom.

"Where does she sleep?" I asked, searching for another room. Bella answered my question by pulling out the bed on the sleeper couch. I tried to hide my surprise but she was quicker than I gave her credit for.

"I know." she was responding to my unspoken thoughts with the humbleness I had recognized in her earlier. "Will you do me a favor and reach up in her cabinet for some blankets?" she said as she wheeled Mrs. Faye into the bathroom.

I opened the cabinet to my left and found a pile of mismatched bed sheets and blankets. I grabbed all of them, feeling the chill in the apartment through my jacket. I paused as I noticed a shelf full of picture frames. I could only guess that these were the faces of her children and grand children. In the largest frame was a picture of her and Bella. I could see from her face in that picture that she loved Bella as her own.

Bella emerged from the bathroom with Mrs. Faye, now dressed in her night gown. Her head bobbed up and down. The poor woman was exhausted. I helped Bella make up the pull out bed using the blankets I had found. Bella struggled to lift Mrs. Faye out of her chair. I stopped her and lifted the woman myself, afraid Bella might hurt herself trying to. The gratitude in her sweet face as I helped her tuck in Mrs. Faye's blankets melted my heart.

The same heart filled with dread as I watched Bella lock Mrs. Faye's door from the hallway and turn to me to say good bye.

"Let me walk you to your door." I offered, feeling silly that I was so desperate for a few more seconds of her time. The walk was a short one, Bella being Mrs. Faye's next door neighbor. She smiled meekly up at me as we reached her door and she found her keys. I couldn't find the words I wanted because all of the _appropriate_ things to say at a moment like this consisted of goodbyes. She held out her hand, shaking mine. She was saying goodbye for me.

"Thank you so much for your help, Edward." she said in a low, shy voice. "It was so nice to meet you."

I could only smile back at her. "Good bye, Bella." The words tumbled out, disobeying my heart. She smiled warmly up at me before disappearing inside her apartment. I slowly turned to walk down the hallway. What just happened? Why was every fiber of my being telling me to turn around and go back? Telling me I would hate myself if I made it to the stairs? I stopped abruptly, mind racing. I couldn't explain why, but I was certain of one thing... if I didn't turn around _right_ now, I would regret it for the rest of my life.


	5. Chapter 5

**BPOV**

I had no idea what was happening to me. I couldn't wrap my head around this. I had always been good at protecting myself, keeping people at a distance when I felt unsure - especially men. Angela had invited me to several parties with our old friends, I always had a good time, but things were so different now. Everyone left with someone on their arm. I on the other hand, was hardly able to unhinge my jaw enough to have a decent conversation.

It wasn't that I couldn't be social - I knew the right things to say and when to say them - it was simply that I felt like I was in another world. I felt like if I tried to get close to someone they wouldn't understand me, my life, my choices. It wasn't until a few hours ago that I met someone who didn't lose interest in me. Who looked at me, completely absorbed in our conversation. Who thought what I had to say mattered.

Who was also the most heartbreakingly handsome man I had ever seen.

And here I was, leaning against my apartment door and staring at the ceiling, listening to his foot steps fade to nothing and letting the truth sink in. I was alone again. I felt the tears begin to well up as this truth sank deeper. I looked around my tiny apartment, laid out almost exactly like Mrs. Faye's. I remembered how proud I had been when I was able to buy my matching bed set all by myself. I remembered how ecstatic I was to be living on my own, to have my own place. I had looked past the lack of space, the shotty heater, the broken tiles in the bathroom. I had looked at this place and I had been nothing but hopeful.

Being alone had never hit me so hard as it did right now. Especially after carefree hours stretched out the floor of an elevator beside Edward Cullen. I had never let myself go like that. He made it so easy. His trusting face, his green eyed gaze, his crooked smile. He _wanted_ to know me. For someone from Hollywood, he was one of the most genuine people I had ever met.

Seeing his honesty as he talked about his life, his dream, his music...I could see he was trusting in me. I didn't know why or how, but I trusted him too. It broke my heart that he felt he didn't have a choice. And I didn't know _why _it should matter to me. I didn't _know_ him. But it _did_ matter. And I couldn't ignore it. It didn't know what this feeling was, but it was_ strong_ and it was new, and it was unshakable. _Am I crazy?_

I had struggled to find a way to stay with him when the elevator finally started to move. I didn't want to watch him leave. Mrs. Faye was the only excuse I had. I was painfully aware of the state of her apartment as I imagined it through his eyes. He was shocked to see there was no bed, only a pull out. I realized he wasn't used to this. But there was no judgment in his eyes, only great care as he helped me lift Mrs. Faye into bed.

I was afraid to look at him as I locked Mrs. Faye safely in her apartment, and yet, at the same time I wanted to. I wanted to know if this was just me, being stupid. I needed to see if he felt this too. When I found the nerve to look up at him, I could see his reluctance to leave and I knew I wasn't alone in this.

But I _froze_.

I was kicking myself now. I had automatically put the shield back up. I had allowed the polite things, the right things to say fall out of my mouth. I let him leave. I let myself say goodbye. I let myself hide.

I was about to break. I was about to let the tears fall when suddenly, there was a knock at my door. My heart jumped to my throat it startled me so. _ Crap. It's probably Annie_. I frantically wiped my eyes and took a deep breath before opening the door.

And then I was staring straight into a pair of dazzling green eyes. I thought I was imagining this. I blinked several times in confusion, but could not hold back my smile. I was thrilled to see Edward Cullen standing there, blushing just like me.

"Hi" I managed to spit out after a few moments. He smiled at me, looking nervous.

"Hi," he breathed. I could see he was struggling for the right words. "Look, I don't exactly know the right way to ask this..." he was looking at his shoes as he hesitated. There were butterflies in my stomach.

Finally he looked up at me and smiled. "I was wondering...if I could-if I could see you again sometime?"

I thought my heart would burst. I was grinning from ear to ear. There was no stopping it. Even if I tried to control my facial features, it was no use. I nodded yes, unable to form words. When I looked at him, his face mirrored my own. He let out a breathy laugh and I knew then I couldn't let him go. He had been brave enough to come back, I would be brave enough to keep him here. He was beginning to turn away, whispering a good night when I stopped him.

"Um, Edward?" He turned around to look at me again. "Do you wanna come in? I was just going to make some coffee, if you want to stay..." I swept my hair behind my ear and shuffled my feet anxiously. He smiled and headed back to me.

I shut the door behind him as he came inside, suddenly very self conscious of my apartment, and my clothes...and my hair. _Did I look ok? _ I peeked in the mirror that hung next to my makeshift coat rack and ran my fingers through my hair quickly. I hung up his coat for him and noticed his duffle-bag.

"You really are a runaway celebrity aren't you?" I giggled, gesturing to his bag.

"Well I didn't exactly get the chance to check into my hotel before being mobbed." he laughed. "I kind of took off without thinking. I'm pretty sure they still have my credit card too." I loved the sound of his laughter. It was like music.

I walked to the kitchen and started the coffee pot. Charlie had bought me one for Christmas last year. He worried about me living here, but he respected my decisions. This apartment was the closest I could get to the Rec center without a car and without going broke. I had Sue to thank for his compliance with my choice. He was always trying to slip me some money, or pay for little things, but I never let him. He went a little overboard last Christmas when he had a valid excuse to buy me things.

I peeked into my tiny living room to see Edward surveying my collection of books. Oh _God, I'm such a geek._ I shivered a little, realizing that the heat in my apartment was out again. _Damn heate_r. I looked out the window over my sink and realized it was raining outside. I listened to the sirens in the distance and the cars in the street...usually the only sounds in my ears at this time of night. But now there was Edward Cullen, standing in my living room, and I could _feel_ him looking at me.

I turned to face him, wary of what I might see. What he must think of me. I marveled at how everything had changed in one day. I usually could care less about what people thought. But now I only cared what_ he_ thought. The rest didn't matter. He was still smiling.

"Aren't you freezing?" he said, breaking the silence. He leaned down to hold his hand over the heat vent. "Your heater isn't on?"

"Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't." I explained. "But _sometimes_, if your lucky, there's a trick that works."

He watched, perplexed. I had figured out somewhat of a routine that sometimes would get the heater going again. Hopefully luck was on my side tonight.

"You kick this corner..." I kicked the right side of the heater.

"...smack this side." _Smack_.

" And punch the top." I brought my fist down, bopping the top of the heater. Edward started to laugh and I turned to him put a hand up gesturing for him to listen.

"Wait for it...." We waited for the heater to spring to life.

The damn thing let out a groan and a hiss, but no air came through its vent. Luck? I guess not. I heard Edward chuckling behind me. I couldn't help but laugh with him and raise my hands in a shrug - defeated.

I grabbed our coffee and we sat down together on the couch. I had never felt like it wasn't normal to not have a tv until now. But Edward didn't seem to care. He swept me up in conversation, asking me about my family, about my favorite books in my collection, telling me some of his own favorites. He told me about his sister Alice and his plan to take off for a month or so to stay out of the public eye for a bit. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. I hung on his every word. And for the first time in a long time, I didn't think twice about the things coming out of my mouth. I felt _safe_ with him.

I was too wrapped up to notice the rain outside, coming down hard and fast against my windows. Thats why I nearly jumped into Edward's lap when thunderstruck and the power went out. _Wonderful_.

He laughed at me with a warm smile and pulled a blanket around my shoulders, the sweetest, gentlest expression on his face. I memorized it as he looked at me. He got up and went to the kitchen.

"Got any candles and matches?"

"Second drawer on your left."

I saw his figure in the dark as he made his way back to me. In minutes the tiny apartment was illuminated by candle light. I looked at the clock - it was after midnight. Edward noticed the time as soon as I did.

"It's late," he said softly. "I should probably get going."

_No no no no! Stay._

"But it's terrible outside." I explained, glad for the rain. "Its too late to walk back to your hotel, especially on this side of town." I knew that Edward would probably be fine if he left, but I had been warned by other _women_ on the floor that it was best not to be out after ten. I found myself grasping at any excuse to make him stay. I stood up quickly, my foot catching in the blanket, causing me to stumble forward. I yelped, knowing I would probably crash to the floor and ruin this moment. But two strong arms caught me. Caught me and didn't let me go.

My face was inches away from his, my hands rested on his chest for balance. I could feel the hard muscle beneath them. _He smells so good._ He pulled back only a little, his face shy and sweet. His hands steadied me and then let go slowly, lingering to pull the blanket back up over my shoulder. He trying his best to be polite.

"You could crash here if you'd like." I said, glad for the lack of good lighting in the apartment. I didn't want him to see me blush or hesitate. I just wanted him to stay. "I mean I-I-I've got extra blankets and pillows.... It wouldn't be a big deal...if you wanted to..." I was rambling again. I looked up at him anxiously. Afraid he would say no. The candle light danced across his face and I could see it then. He was happy. He was trying to hide it, but he was.

"Are you sure, Bella?" he asked quietly.

"Absolutely."

**Hehehehe... More to come soon! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews! Please keep em coming, I can use every bit of feedback! OK...just a quick note....Don't get too excited about smut just yet. I did rate this M, and I **_**will**_** live up to the rating...eventually. For now, I'm trying to stress Edward and Bella's **_**connection**_** before jumping into the fun stuff. So I'm taking this slow for now and enjoying the fluff. Oh, speaking of fluff.... :)**

**EPOV**

I had battled with myself in that hallway. Even when I came to the realization that I _had_ to see Bella again, I was suddenly terrified of what she might think of me. I had been around my share of beautiful women, but Bella Swan was leaving me feeling like a school boy again - absolutely flustered and bashful.

When she opened the door I had no idea what I was going to say. I was acting completely on impulse. It took me a moment to compose myself when I was finally standing face to face with her. Her eyes were glassy and her cheeks were red. The look of pure happiness at the sight of me in her door way...it gave my heart_ wings_.

She wanted to see me again. She wanted me to come inside. She wanted me here. I thought I would _explode_.

How bizarre this day had been. One minute I'm lost in my own loneliness and outrunning paparazzi...and the next I can't tear my eyes away from a beautiful girl trying desperately just to get her heater to work. She was utterly adorable. Everything about her was enchanting me.

I reveled in the sound of her voice as she sat beside me on the couch, our conversation continuing easily as it had in the elevator. I noticed the way her speech flowed eloquently when spoke of the literature lining her walls and how she stammered only slightly when she flirted. I watched her tuck her long, beautiful hair behind her ears before she sipped her coffee. I noticed how small she was, curled up on the couch, knees drawn to her chest, arms tucked in behind them, hands delicately curled around her coffee cup. When I spoke, she never once looked away. She _heard_ me. She _listened_.

I knew nothing of space or time as I sat beside her. I only knew that this was the beginning of something. Something big. I didn't allow myself to even think about the paparazzi waiting for me at the hotel, or how I would possibly get to the house in the woods. She had me living in the moment, unable to move.

I had hardly noticed the storm outside until thunder shook the tiny apartment and made Bella jump, her body involuntarily moving closer to me as the power flickered out. I could hardly react to the sudden darkness when I was enthralled with the feel of her body against mine. She was shivering slightly. I pulled down a blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped it around her shoulders. _I could see her smile in the dark_.

Wanting to be a helpful guest, I jumped to my feet and found my way to the kitchen.

"Got any candles and matches?"

"Second drawer on your left."

I easily found what I was looking for, lighting the candles as I made my way back to the living room. Even in near darkness, she _radiated_ beauty. I followed her gaze to the clock. _Past midnight already_? I hated to leave Bella alone here, but I knew it was the polite thing to do. I didn't want her to get the wrong impression of me. I didn't want to overstay my welcome.

"It's late." I said in almost a whisper. "I should probably get going."

I almost cheered _out loud _when she protested.

"But it's terrible outside." She looked out the window at the pouring rain. In the candle light I could see her eyes were frantic. She was trying to hide it from me. "It's too late to walk back to your hotel, especially on this side of town."

I had forgotten where I was. I pictured the neighborhood I had sprinted through earlier, and then imagined it cloaked in darkness. She made a good point.

She tried to rise from the couch but lost her balance. And before I knew what I was doing, she was in my arms. Her face was so close and she smelled so sweet. _I wanted to kiss her_. Her hands fells gracefully on my chest. Even though it was only a moment of clumsiness, I could feel how perfectly she fit in my arms. It was almost as if she had been molded for me.

I had to drag myself back to sense and reason and politeness. Again, I didn't want to give the wrong impression. I wanted to do this the _right _way. I eased back slowly, pulling the blanket up over her shoulder again.

"You could crash here if you'd like." she said quietly, looking down at the floor, afraid to meet my eyes. My breath hitched in my throat. _She wanted me to stay_. And then she was stammering again and I couldn't help but smile at her. "I mean I-I-I've got extra blankets and pillows...It wouldn't be a big deal...if you wanted to..."

"Are you sure, Bella?"

"Absolutely." Her firm answer filled me with relief. She was feeling this too. This indescribable pull between us.

I watched as she went to the cabinet and pulled out bedding, bring extra blankets down from the top shelf. Now that her warm body wasn't next to me, I could feel how cold the apartment had become. _How did she live like this?_ She pushed back her coffee table and pulled out the sleeper couch, setting the bedding in a pile on top.

"I'm just going to change and brush my teeth." she said as she headed to the bathroom.

I grabbed my duffel bag and found my tooth brush. After brushing furiously at the kitchen sink, I grabbed a pillow and an extra blanket, setting up camp on the floor beside her bed. It was going to be a long, cold night. But I didn't_ want_ to be anywhere else.

I stripped down to my boxers, the cold immediately giving me goose bumps. It was freezing. I quickly laid down under my blankets and rested my head on the pillow.

I heard the bathroom door open and tip toeing feet. I looked up to see Bella walking towards the bed and had to fight to keep my mouth from falling open. She was wearing an old pair of sweat pants and a cotton t-shirt. The shirt hugged her upper body perfectly. Several holes littered its hem, exposing her firm torso. She too was feeling the chill in the room... her body gave her away.

She hopped into bed, burying herself under her covers and shivering. She leaned over to look down at me on the floor.

"You _can't_ possibly be comfortable..." she said, looking me over. I didn't want her to worry about me.

"I'm perfectly fine." I assured her. When she gave me a skeptical look, I tried again. "I'm really alright, Bella. Thank you for letting me stay."

She seemed to accept my answer. She smiled at me and nodded in response, turning over to lay down. About a minute had passed when she popped her head over the side of the bed again.

"Edward," she said in a whisper. My name on her lips was music to my ears. "I really couldn't live with myself if I let you freeze on my floor." I sat up to look at her.

"Bella, I'm really ok." I said with a laugh. "There's no need to worry, I'm absolutely fine here."

"No, really Edward," she insisted. "I appreciate the gesture, I really do. But I would feel so much better if I knew you were comfortable."

"But I am comf- "

"I don't believe you." she laughed. I wasn't sure what my next move was. _ Was this really ok? _ She read my hesitance and tried to convince me.

"It's alright." she explained. She was already grabbing my pillow and pulling it up onto the bed. "We're both adults, its just a place to sleep." Bella's hand connected with mine in the dark and I felt the electricity again. She coaxed me to the bed. I knew as soon as she touched me that I couldn't say no.

I sank into the mattress, feeling instant relief in my back and shoulders. Even though we did not touch, I could feel warmth radiating from her side of the bed. I struggled to speak, feeling the need to say something.

"I trust you, Edward." she whispered. Somehow she had known exactly what I needed to hear. I finally turned my head to look at her. She was a vision. Her long, wavy hair spilled over the pillow case and her eyes pierced mine even in the dark. The blankets were wrapped around her, perfectly cradling her small frame.

"I don't know why or how," she confessed sleepily. "But I do."

I didn't know how to respond with words. So I let my hand find hers under the blanket, and gave it a soft squeeze. She beamed up at me and I watched her slowly drifted to sleep.

I could not harness the happiness in my chest, nor could I look away from her sleeping face. _She never let go of my hand_. I lay there, reveling in the feel of her skin, listening to her mumble in her sleep, and praying this would be real when I woke up in the morning. At one point I was holding my breath as her body moved closer to mine, her cheek resting on my upper arm. It took me what seemed like forever to fall asleep. But when I finally closed my eyes, I had never slept so soundly.


	7. Chapter 7

**BPOV**

The morning sun tickled my face. For once I had actually gotten a decent rest. I let my mind wake, but refused to open my eyes. My senses slowly began to come into focus. I suddenly became acutely aware of the strange warmth my body was tangled around. Waking up in the morning _usually_ consisted of me, hugging my blankets and trying not to move out of the warm spot my body had created over night. I had never woken up this cozy before and I allowed myself to open my eyes and see why.

Over night my body had gravitated towards the only other source of heat in the bed. _Edward Cullen_. I froze, as I assessed my current position.

Edward was lying on his back, his face peaceful and quiet, still dreaming. One arm was outstretched and rested underneath my head, the other was on his chest, his hand gently covering mine. I listened to him breathe, reveling in the fact that he was still here. That all of yesterday's events had been real. That he was _holding_ me.

I was suddenly afraid that he would wake up. That he would realize he didn't want me and get up and leave.

But then I found myself _even more_ afraid, that if he did wake up, I would kiss him. Right then and there, without even thinking twice.

This is when I realized I should probably remove myself from temptation. After all, I just met him yesterday. Kissing him would probably scare him away. I knew now that was the _last_ thing I wanted.

Carefully, I lifted my head and slowly slipped my hand from underneath his. He only stirred slightly. His beautiful face was lost in dreams. I quietly slipped out of bed and turned to look at the clock. It was 9:30am, Friday morning. I had to be to work at ten thirty for my first appointment of the day with Noah and his family.

How _torn_ I was. I let my eyes rest on the sleeping man in my bed. His bare chest was perfectly sculpted. He didn't look like a body builder, he looked like a handsome, healthy, _strong_ man. I hadn't realized in the dark last night just how fit he really was. His arms, resting lightly on the bed, were defined and toned. I remembered how they felt around me as he caught me from nearly falling on my face last night.

I noticed his expression changing in his sleep. His face moved only slightly, but I was afraid he would wake up. Surely he would notice the absence of warmth in the bed. I reached out and pulled the blankets closer to him, feeling more at ease when he was once again peaceful. I wanted so badly to crawl back into bed with him and just enjoy this while he was here. While this was still real.

But I knew I would beat myself up terribly if I cancelled on Noah. I forced myself to turn around and head to the bathroom, knowing the shower would put some sense back into me.

Taking a shower in my apartment? I had it down to a science. It had taken me about a week when I first moved in to get the hang of making the most of my hot water time. I had it all timed out. I yanked the knob on the shower, getting the water running, then turned to the cabinet to grab my toothbrush. It took exactly two minutes for the water to warm up - just enough time to brush. As soon as the water was hot, I stripped out of my ratty old pajamas and hopped in. I had exactly seven minutes before the water would lose its heat.

I took extra care getting ready this morning. I made sure every inch of me was clean and smelling sweetly. I washed my hair with my favorite strawberry shampoo, shaved my legs - nicking myself a few times of course - a girl could only manage so much in seven minutes.

I hopped out of the shower, covering myself in lotion and brushing out my hair. I was especially aware of my appearance today. I couldn't deny that this was solely because the man sleeping in the next room. I wanted to be beautiful for _him_.

When I was dressed and ready, I quietly opened the bathroom door and peeked out. Edward had moved. He was on his side now but still sound asleep. I couldn't wake him. I wanted to stare at him all day long. I checked the clock. It was almost ten - I had to get going if I was going to walk to the Rec in time.

I went to the kitchen counter and wrote a quick note...

_Edward,_

_I didn't have the heart to wake you this morning. Had to run to work. If you're not here when I get back I understand. _

I took a deep breath. Hoping to God he would be here when I returned.

_But if you do decide you want to stay, I'll be back tonight around six - with take out._

_~Bella_

Someone _did_ tell me once that the best way to a man's heart was through his stomach.

I checked on Mrs. Faye before taking the _stairs_ and heading out the door. I was relieved to see Annie had decided to show up for work today. I tried my best not to glare at her, but I was sure she could feel me radiating anger when I saw her. I had written letters of my concern to Faye's children, but none of them were responded to. Annie was certainly not the best nurse, but she was all Mrs. Faye had.

Work seemed to go by at a snail's pace. I loved every moment of it, as I usually did. However, my mind was in torment, wondering if Edward would be in my apartment when I got home. I had two appointments that day. Normally I would have been home by one at the latest, but recently the Rec staff had been interested in putting us through defense training courses. The Rec was in the middle of a fallen town and the staff was becoming more and more aware of it as crime rates went up. They made it mandatory for all of us to learn how to protect ourselves and the children we worked with.

I was thankful for these courses, but they scared me. I couldn't imagine anyone trying to harm the kids. I shuddered just thinking of it. Today's building safety policies and procedures lecture seemed to drag on for an eternity. I found myself day dreaming.

I thought of the night before, how easy it had been to forget the time. I thought of the way Edward had looked in candle light. How he pulled a blanket around me. How he had locked his eyes with mine while I spoke. How he was such a gentleman, trying to sleep on my cold wooden floor. How somehow, I knew I could trust him.

I thought of him now, wondering if maybe he had woken up this morning, looked around at my shitty apartment and _booked it_ back to his hotel - disappearing from my life just as quickly as he had come into it.

Or if maybe...I would open the door tonight and find him there, waiting for me.

When the day was done, I found myself walking briskly to the nearest chinese place. The short asian man behind the counter grew impatient with me - I took forever to order. I had no idea what Edward liked and I wanted to get this right. I changed my order at least three times.

With a warm paper bag of food in my arms, I made my way home. The butterflies in my stomach were relentless. I raced up the stairs to my floor, stopping at the top to catch my breath and smooth my hair. It was 5:30, I made it back early.

I opened the door quickly, my anxiety governing me. My heart sank when I saw my couch. The bed was neatly tucked away, the blankets were all folded and put away in my cabinet. His duffle bag was no where to be found. I felt so incredibly stupid. _How had I let myself get my hopes up? This was so silly of me_.

I pulled off my jacket and started to hang it up, along with my keys when I heard laughter coming from the kitchen. It sounded like Mrs. Faye.

I held the warm paper bag of food closer to be as I turned the corner into the kitchen.

There was Mrs. Faye, sitting at my tiny kitchen table, playing cards with Edward Cullen - who was looking at me - beaming.

"Bella honey your home!" exclaimed Mrs. Faye. "You're just in time for another round of gin." She smiled as she shuffled cards. I nodded in response to her, but my eyes had never left Edward's.

"You stayed." I breathed, knowing that no matter how softly I said it, I could not contain the joy behind my words. His rose to his feet and crossed the tiny kitchen to meet me, taking the heavy paper bag from my arms and smiling brilliantly all the while.

"Let me help you with that..." his eyes lingered on mine.

"You brought food home Bella?" Mrs. Faye said. Edward moved the food to the counter where I helped him find plates. "Thats good to see, dear. I was just telling Edward you need to eat more. You work too hard sweet heart."

"I get by alright..." I tried to argue, but Mrs. Faye's mind had already jumped to the next thought.

"Edward is quite good at gin, Bella. You should see him." she kept shuffling cards. "Reminds me of my Arthur he does... He loved to play cards too..."

I turned to Edward, who was smiled sweetly at me and started helping me dish out food for the three of us.

"I ran out for a bit this morning," Edward explained to me as we sat down to eat. "I had a few things to take care of. But I got your note and I knew I had to come back." he blushed, looking down at his food. "On my way back I found Mrs. Faye in the lobby."

"Alone?" I asked, not able to hide my contempt for Annie in my tone. Mrs. Faye took no notice of this.

"Edward was such a gentleman, Bella." she raved. "He's a good boy." She reached out and held my hand, her eyes looking through me. I knew she saw my loneliness, even when I tried to hide it from her. She had told me more than once that I needed someone like Arthur was to her. Someone to take care of me when I couldn't take care of myself.

I could barely wrap my head around how perfect Edward was. All through dinner his conversation charmed us. He was attentive, polite, and _funny_. I, once again, reveled in how gently he had helped me get Mrs. Faye to bed again that night. I couldn't understand this. In just two days, I had met the perfect man.

And here I was. Terrified of what this could be and even more terrified of letting it go.

We walked slowly back to my door, both of us trying to prolong a good bye. My face hurt from smiling so much. But when I was around him, I just couldn't help it.

"Thank you so much," I said turning to him as we reached my door. I sincerely meant it. "I still can't believe you spent the afternoon with Mrs. Faye. I-I can't tell you how much that means to me..."

He nodded meaningfully at me. "It was my pleasure, Bella."

I was blushing again. "I was afraid..." I said, almost in a whisper, looking down at my shoes and then back at him. "...that you would be gone when I got back." I was surprised by how much I was letting myself admit. "Afraid...that none of this had been real."

"I was afraid of the same thing when I woke up this morning..." he replied with a grin. "There's something about you Bella..." His green eyes were bright with intensity. "...I don't understand it yet, but...I...I don't want to be away from you."

My heart jumped.

"I want to know everything about you." he breathed, his face moving slightly closer to mine. I was lost in his eyes, forgetting about the oxygen I needed, when I clumsily dropped my keys with a loud clank on the floor. I was almost thankful for the break in this intense moment. Before I could move, he reached down and picked them up. I swear I heard him chuckling.

"Bella," he said, a playful expression on his face. "I was wondering...what are your plans tomorrow?"

"I hadn't really planned anything." I answered honestly. "Why?"

"Well you've been so good to me, letting me stay... I must make it up to you." he said. I started to protest.

"Edward it's really ok, you don't have to do anything special for me. I - "

"No please, I insist." he said. His eyes were soft as he looked at me. He spoke carefully... "Will you spend the day with me tomorrow, Bella?"

How could anyone say no to this man and his beautiful, crooked smile?

**Hehehe...stay tuned for the next chapter! It's gonna be goooood. R&R pretty please :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello again :) Thanks to all of you who stick with me and keep sending me feedback. I really appreciate it and I'll try not to disappoint. I'm going to try and post two chapters at once to make up for lost time.**

**EPOV**

Yesterday morning I had been so soundly asleep. I hadn't slept so well in ages. And I hadn't registered Bella's absence until I grew increasingly colder in her bed, her warm body no longer beside me. Even then I was unable to wake, feeling the thick blankets covering me, warm with the remnants of her body heat. I vaguely remember hearing her shower sputter to life, but I was too caught up in my dreams to open my eyes. I _did_ smell her strawberry shampoo. It filled my nose, making my dreams seem even more heavenly.

When I rolled over later that morning I felt the crunch of paper beneath me - her note. As I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, I couldn't help but notice an undeniable disheartening feeling in the pit of my chest when I found myself in an empty apartment... but reading her note had given me hope. _ She wanted me to stay. _

Looking around the place, I realized I had to get myself together before I saw Bella again. I checked the clock, it was almost eleven. Bouncing out of bed, I threw my jeans on and slid a sweater over my head. It was _freezing_. _How did she do this every morning?_

I quickly folded up the pull out and the blankets on top of it, putting them away in the cabinet. Gathering my things, I reached into my bag and grabbed a baseball cap and my darkest pair of sunglasses. I needed to make it back to the hotel unrecognized.

Taking a different route back to the hotel, I made it to the side entrance without any problems. Fall was in full swing in Forks, and the air was colder than what I was used to. Pulling my jacket tighter around myself, I made my way to the front desk. Luckily there was an older man working there. An older man who didn't recognize me, returned my credit card, and easily booked me a room. I was looking over my shoulder constantly. I felt like I was holding my breath just trying to get to a safe place to simply _be_.

When I was finally safe in my room, I called up the local Rent-a-Car, making sure I had a vehicle to get me to my father's house. I had been waiting for this vacation for months, and now that it was here, I couldn't keep my mind off of Bella. I wondered if she made it to work ok, if she really wanted to be around me as much as I wanted to be around her. I thought about going back to see her that night.

My anxiety was building and I had too much time to kill. I ended up taking a long hot shower, taking my time shaving and putting on clean clothes. I was so wary of even leaving my room I had room service deliver a light lunch. Time seemed to drag.

Finally I decided_, to hell with it_, and I grabbed my sunglasses and my baseball cap. I took the same route back to the apartments. People must have thought I was absolutely insane. One minute I would walk while caught up in my anxiety - taking long swift strides and walking briskly. Then the next minute I would tell myself to stop being ridiculous and slow down. My ever-changing speed must have been quite entertaining, because an homeless man sitting in a sleeping bag on the corner of Bella's street looked at me with a grin and said, "Off ta see a lady friend, eh?"

I couldn't be sure if he meant I was off to see a hooker, or if I was off to see a girlfriend...at least not in these parts of town. All I knew was that Bella's sudden, mysterious, and beautifully unexpected presence in my life had reduced me to the mannerisms of a love struck school boy.

It was around four when I finally arrived at Moss Apartments. I made my way to the lobby, catching myself smirking at the elevator. Just as I was about to head to the stairs, I spotted Mrs. Faye, by herself, searching the ground warily and wringing her hands.

"I can't find them...." she mumbled as I approached. "I can't find them anywhere...."

"Mrs. Faye, are you alright?"

"Oh, oh y-yes I just...I can't find my green glass earrings." she looked up at me and I saw in her eyes that she remembered me from the day before. "Will you help me look for them?"

I thought of Bella's reaction to this the day before and decided it was best to follow her lead. I was now beginning to truly understand the look of pure anger on Bella's face when she spoke of Mrs. Faye's nurse. _How could anyone just leave her like this_?

"Of course I'll help you." I said. "But lets get you home first okay?"

"Alright..." she said simply. This time we had no trouble with the elevator. I found myself remembering something Bella had said about her being a magnet for bad luck and chuckled softly to myself. Maybe she was right. After all, I had never considered _myself _to be good luck...and I was certainly attracted to her.

Mrs. Faye quickly immersed me in conversation - mostly about Bella. For her age and mental state, she was nonetheless - perceptive. When she found out I was waiting for Bella to return from work, she found her spare key to Bella's apartment and let us in.

"She's a good girl, Edward." she told me as she shuffled cards at Bella's kitchen table. "She works hard, takes good care of me and those kids, never complains even when she has the right to..." she dealt me a hand for a game of gin.

"Lord knows I wish she'd eat more..." Mrs. Faye was mumbling again. I smiled as we played cards. It was a relief to know that someone was watching out for Bella. To know that I wasn't the only one worried about her.

I heard Mrs. Faye giggling. I looked down at the cards. She had just kicked my _ass_ at gin.

I heard the front door click as it opened and my stomach was in knots. Sure enough, Bella came around the corner, holding what looked to be a heavy grocery bag. My heart swelled as I saw Bella looking at me with nothing but happiness and surprise.

"Bella, honey your home!" said Mrs. Faye, turning in her wheel chair. "You're just in time for another round of gin!"

Bella never looked away from me. "You stayed." she said in almost a whisper. I got up to help her with the large bag in her hands. Our eyes never disconnected.

"Let me help you with that..."

"You brought food home Bella? Thats good to see, dear. I was just telling Edward you need to eat more. You work too hard sweet heart."

As I unloaded food from the bag I looked over at Bella. "I get by alright..." she began to argue. I looked her over. She was quite small, but she looked to be healthy enough. Her deep brown eyes were warm and cheeks were pink from the chilly air outside.

As the night went on, I was lost in the moment. Hollywood was far behind me. Any thoughts or worries about the future were gone. I found myself thinking about how my life would be if I wasn't an actor, if I wasn't plastered to bill boards and forced into silly interviews and press conferences. If I had the choice, _this_ was what I would choose. Tiny apartment and all. I wouldn't care about the shotty heater or the rickety pull out couch....

Because as I sat around that small card table with Bella and Mrs. Faye, I recognized the first moment of true happiness I had experienced in months. I was utterly content with the world. Nothing could touch me.

I think it was probably this feeling that gave me the courage to ask to spend the day with Bella.

I wish that courage would return to me now. Here I was, sitting in my rental car on the corner of Bella's street - _anxious as hell_. I told her I would meet her here around eleven. It was now ten forty five.

I pictured my father, Carlisle, and my mother, Esme. Theirs was a love I envied. I had had many relationships, but none were lasting. None were real. I thought of the right things to do, the chivalrous things my dad had been so quick to teach myself and my brother Emmet.

Living in the fast lane never seemed to work out for me. So now, as I watched Bella appear outside the complex, I had the overwhelming determination to do this the _right _way.

I hopped out of the car and jogged over to meet her. She turned to see me and her eyes lit. She was gorgeous. She wore denim jeans that hugged her body in all the right places, a jacket to keep her warm and a scarf knotted around her neck. Her deep brown locks fell in perfect waves down her back. Her hands were stuffed in her jacket pocket. I was delighted to see her blush at the sight of me.

"Hey," she said softly, cheeks still glowing pink. I smiled down at her and we started to walk to my car. I opened the door for her as she hopped in and I jogged to my side of the car, jumping in beside her. It was quiet for a moment.

"Are you as nervous as I am?" Bella asked, breaking the silence and looking at me under beautiful, long eye lashes.

Both of us let out a laugh of relief. We could not erase our smiles.

"Absolutely." I replied.

**Stay tuned. I'm posting another chapter today! And it's gonna be much better I promise! Next chapter is a major turning point....things should get much much better from here on out. :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks for being so patient! I made this chapter a bit longer than usual to make up for the time it took me to post.**

**Edward and Bella date? Hmmm...I'm thinkin meadow......**

**BPOV**

Mr brain was in a million different places at once. I hadn't been on a date in about a year. I had gotten up earlier then I probably needed to. But Edward was going to be here at eleven and I wasn't about to waste any time.

As I took my seven minute shower, dressed and combed my hair I was mulling over all the things I was supposed to remember. Things like, remembering to smile, when to talk and when not to talk, to be open but not too open, to be funny but not obnoxious, to be flirty but not slutty....

_Flirting_. Had I forgotten how? God I hoped not.

I ate a quick breakfast of tea and toast before I locked up my apartment and went to see Mrs. Faye.

"Bella!" I smiled warmly at her. She always greeted me like I was the only person on the planet. Mrs. Faye was busy reading a book, her reading glasses making her eyes look three times their size. Annie was on the couch, flipping through magazines. She nodded in my direction, acknowledging me but never looking away from her magazine.

I couldn't help but feel slightly wonderful knowing that the face she was probably staring at would be waiting for me outside today.

I gave Mrs. Faye a big hug and started to clean up. Her kitchen was littered with dirty dishes and cigarette butts. I was trying hard to hold my tongue while I wiped down the counter and threw away Annie's makeshift ashtrays.

"Where are you off to today Bella?" asked Mrs. Faye. "You look beautiful!"

"Thanks." I said. "I"m actually going to see Edward." I was careful not to mention his last name. "Remember you met him yesterday?"

"Of course!" she said. "You'll have a wonderful time dear, I just know it. It's about time you got out there instead of worrying about little old me."

I hugged Mrs. Faye and kissed her goodbye. I walked out of the kitchen and past Annie on the couch. My skin was burning. If I found Mrs. Faye alone in the lobby when I got back..._so help me_....

"Baby Bella's got a date?" Annie sneered at me. _Bitch_.

"I do actually," I retorted. "So I would appreciate it if you actually stayed with Mrs. Faye till eight like you're supposed to."

Her eyes widened. To her I was quiet little Bella, stuck in a book. Usually I didn't have the courage to speak up, but the more I found Mrs. Faye alone, the more I knew I needed to. Somehow in the past few days I had found my courage. It didn't hurt that _Edward Cullen_ was interested in "quiet little Bella." I smiled and gave her a kurt nod as I marched out the door, feeling oddly confident.

As soon as I saw him jogging towards me up the sidewalk, my newborn confidence shrank. He was just so _perfect_. His face was absolutely beautiful, his skin flawless. His cheeks were pink, I couldn't tell if it was because he saw me or because of the slight chill in the air. But I didn't care because his green eyes were resting only on _me_.

"Hey" I breathed. His grin became even wider.

Like a true gentlemen, he opened the car door for me. It made me think of my mother, Renee, and her endless slew of boyfriends. There was a difference between the truly chivalrous and the arrogant macho men. There was the guy that would open doors and pay for your ticket because it proved his own masculinity. But then there was Edward, who did it because it was right, and because he cared more about me than how he looked. It still blew my mind that he wanted to spend time with _me_.

He jumped into the drivers seat and revved the engine, the silver Volvo humming to life. It was silent in the car. I finally just let it out.

"Are you as nervous as I am?" I asked hesitantly. I laughed as I heard him sigh loudly in relief and chuckle along with me. He looked me in the eyes and as we pulled away from the curb I heard him say, "Absolutely."

The old brick buildings started to blur by. Simply by being beside him again, I could feel myself start to calm down as I had that night talking on the couch, or during those few hours on the elevator.

"So where are we headed?" I asked.

"Someplace I hope you'll love." He said smiling at me. "I hope you don't mind, its a bit of a drive." We turned onto a back road taking us away from downtown Forks. Buildings started to melt away and turned into long stretches of tree line. Once again we fell into conversation just as easily as we had the previous nights. His wit and charm were just as mesmerizing as the night before. I felt so_ safe_ with him. Before I knew it, the car had stopped and we were in front of a line of trees and the beginning of a trail.

Edward reached into the backseat and pulled out a back pack.

"Just some lunch for when we get there." he explained. _The boy had packed a picnic._ I was grinning like an idiot.

"Are you always this full of surprises, Edward Cullen?" I laughed as we both got out of the car.

"Only when I'm around you, Bella Swan." he replied. My heart was in my throat. Edward didn't miss a beat. "Are you warm enough?" he said. "It's just a little farther on foot." I nodded, thrilled that he remembered how much I loved the fall. I had told him that night on the couch when I had to explain not owning a car. I knew that where ever we were going, it would be perfect for both of us. No one would be after him up here.

I felt my hand tingle as he reached for it. It was chilly outside, but I was warmed by his touch as well as the sun peeking out behind the clouds overhead. Not only did this beautiful being bring a picnic...he brought the sunshine....to _Forks_. How did this happen to me?

He helped me keep my balance over knotted roots and stones, catching me if I happened to trip...and I definitely did. I explained to him the uncoordinated gene I received from my mother. Somehow she had grown out of it and I hadn't. He laughed at me, putting his hand around my waist to help me over a giant puddle.

"We made it." he said. I followed his gaze, looking ahead at the most beautiful meadow I had ever seen. I was speechless.

The sun had abandoned it's cloud cover and was now shining down on tall green grass. The colors of the surrounding trees were brilliant oranges and golds, crimsons and speckled browns. It was breathtaking.

I felt Edward squeeze my hand. He looked at me with a question in his eyes as he took in my expression.

"It's just - I - I've lived in Forks almost all my life and I've never seen this." I explained. "It's gorgeous, Edward." He smiled triumphantly, letting go of my hand to unfold a flannel blanket and take off his backpack.

"My dad and my brother Emmet and I used to come here while we were staying at the house. It was like our own private little get away."

He unpacked the thermos and the food and poured me a cup of hot chocolate. He sat down close to me on the blanket, our bodies almost touching.

"I can certainly understand the need to getaway." I said, taking a deep relaxing breath.

"I see I'm not the only one who needs to." he replied, reading my face. He got quiet for a moment and we were staring at each other again, our eyes unable to stray from each others. "The first time you saw me, Bella, I was running. I feel like I've been doing that for too long." I could tell he was being careful, he didn't want to scare me. But he looked at me lovingly and said, "I don't know why, but with you I just feel..._safe_."

My cheeks felt warm again. I was sitting with my knees brought up to my chest and Edward sat beside me, his body turned opposite mine so he could face me. I found the courage to look at him again and said, "I feel exactly the same way."

Edward was beaming.

The afternoon was a perfect one. I had never felt so completely free with myself as I did around him. He told me about his adventures here with his dad and his brother when they were younger. He showed me the scar on his knee from where he fell during one of his summers here at La Push Beach as a kid. He listened intently as I told him about my old house is Arizona. He laughed at my jokes and was constantly smiling.

It couldn't have been more perfect. And then....

It started to rain.

Big, fat droplets came splattering down. I looked at the horizon spotting the storm clouds rolling in. We jumped to our feet, threw the backpack together and started to race through the woods down to the car, laughing the entire time as we got completely soaked. I couldn't even worry about the rain, or think about what it was doing to my hair and my clothes. All that mattered was that Edward's hand was wrapped firmly around mine.

Just as we were about to break into the clearing where the car was parked, Edward came to a sudden stop. We were several feet away from the edge of the woods. He pulled me slightly behind him, shielding me.

"What is it?" I whispered.

"Look there..." he pointed. I squinted out to the clearing. Then I saw them. Parked behind Edward's silver volvo was a black SUV and smaller blue honda. They boxed in the Volvo, trapping it in its parking space. The owners of the cars were outside talking in the rain. One of them stopped to snap a picture of Edward's car. I immediately recognized him. He had been trailing Edward just the other day. I had seen his face amidst the mob of paparazzi. Edward cursed under his breath.

"What should we do?" I asked, suddenly afraid. I could feel how tense Edward was.

"Come on," he said. "Follow me." With that he pulled me gently and quietly back up the trail until we were lost in the trees, far away from the awaiting paparazzi. Edward took me past the meadow, finding a different trail and taking it.

"Where are we going?" I asked as we tried to hurry through the rain.

"It won't be much farther." he promised. I was soaked to the bone. The daylight was changing, it was almost five o'clock. Up ahead I could see the trees start to thin. As we got closer I saw a thin gravel road winding through the woods. Before I knew it we were on it. Edward was muttering under his breath. My heart was sinking as I watched his mood change entirely. _No wonder he was running away. I would too._

His whole body was rigid as he walked, he was looking over his shoulder repeatedly. I stopped my brisk pace beside him, squeezing his hand. He turned around immediately to look at me.

"I'm so sorry, Bella...damnet I knew this would happen..." he was mumbling. "I never meant for that to -"

"_Edward_." I said softly. At the sound of my voice, his face softened. The rain had lessened now, but it fell ever so softly on our heads. He looked even more handsome in the rain. Water dripping down his face and playing in his hair. His forehead was creased in worry. Before I could stop myself, my hands reached out to smooth away his concern, coming to rest on each side of his face.

"_It's ok_." I said, wishing to give him courage with my smile. My thumb caressed his cheek and my eyes locked with his. "Your _safe_. Remember?"

Now that I was touching him, now that our faces were so close, now that I could feel his arms around me...I couldn't stop myself. I stood on my tip toes and placed my lips softly against his. His lips were so warm and full, he kissed me so gently at first. My hands tangled in his hair and his kiss became more passionate and deep, taking my breath away.

I could have died happily, right there in his arms.

When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against mine, eyes closed, his smile growing wider by the second. "_Safe_." he whispered, letting out a shaky breath of relief.

He grasped my hand, bringing it to his lips for just a moment and softly touching my cheek. With that we turned and walked up the road. Right up to the front door of the Cullen house.

**Merry Christmas fellow Twilighters! R&R!**


	10. Chapter 10

**EPOV**

When I spotted those _vultures_ around my car, I began to panic. _They had followed me_. I stood protectively in front of Bella as my mind raced, looking for an escape. I winced as I imagined them finding her here with me and I feared for her. I didn't want her to have a life like mine...stripped of privacy and personal freedoms, constantly under a microscope.

I had been perfectly blissful all afternoon beside this girl. I was beginning to truly know her. She was letting me inside her head, sharing pieces of her life with me. And now, I was constantly craving more, addicted to her very presence.

As we stood hiding at the edge of the woods, reality came crashing down on me. I was being so _selfish_. It wasn't until now that I had allowed myself to stop and think. This indescribable connection, this magnetic pull between us... it may cost me nothing. But it could cost Bella _everything_. I looked down into her sweet, chocolate brown eyes and saw in them nothing but trust. Guilt overwhelmed me.

The flash of a camera caught brought me quickly to the present as a camera man shot a picture of my rental car. My mind was in overdrive. My number one priority now was to get Bella out of here, to keep her safe.

"What should we do?" she whispered, her eyes filled with concern. I could see then in her eyes that she was afraid _for me_. I would never get used to Bella's selflessness. My heart ached as I looked at her, knowing I had put her in harms way. I needed to get her out of here.

"Come on," I answered. "Follow me."

We took off into the woods, my hand never letting go of hers. Lost in the rain and in my own frustration we trudged further through the wet forest. My body started to stiffen as I walked, my mind refusing to wrap around the fact that this... thing...this beautiful, unexpected feeling I had for Bella...I would have to swallow it and let her go just to keep her safe.

I was consumed with anger, sadness and frustration. _It was so unfair._ Every fiber of my being was rebelling against this cruel reality. Letting go was never something I was good at.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked, worried.

"It won't be much farther." I promised. I could see the road ahead now. I knew we were close. I had wanted to bring her to the house earlier, but I had decided against it. I didn't want her to get the wrong impression of me. But now, we didn't have much of a choice. Both of us were soaked to the bone. We needed _warm_, we needed _dry_, we needed a place to hide. I found Emmet's old trail from the meadow to the house and took it.

I checked over my shoulder, cursing to myself. The mood of the day had changed so drastically in minutes. I was missing my spot on the flannel blanket beside Bella in the meadow. Neither of us had a care in the world this afternoon. For a minute, both of us had been free. There was no Hollywood, there was no paparazzi. There was no work for Bella, no one who needed her help and attention. There was only us.

My feet hit the gravel road and I pulled Bella along in the direction of the house. Suddenly I felt her come to a halt behind me. I turned to face her, and before she could even speak, apologies tumbled from my mouth. I wished I could tell her, I wished I could make her understand the complexity of the emotions running through me.

"_Edward_."

At the sound of her voice I felt _peace_. It lasted only for a moment, but it surrounded me completely. It diminished my ability to worry. It captured me and held me prisoner.

Bella came closer to me, closer than we had ever been. Her hands caressed my face, erasing my worries and resting on my cheeks.

"_Its ok_." she whispered. She _sparkled_ in the rain. Her wet hair fell around her perfect face, her brown eyes a haven in the storm.

"You're _safe_. Remember?"

And with those words, she closed the gap between us, bringing her lips to rest on mine. _God, Bella._ I was immersed in her kiss. The gentleness of her mouth, the sweetness of her taste on my lips. The passion that both of us had held back for each other had manifested itself in this moment. All of our walls were gone. How had I become so lucky?

As we pulled away from each other, and I rested my head against hers, I knew I couldn't let her go. _I didn't have the strength_. I was in too deep.

"_Safe._" I repeated, feeling the impact of her words and of her touch. She was glowing.

Kissing her hand gently, we turned towards the house. Our stride was no longer hurried or frantic. She had put me at ease.

Though I knew there were many obstacles still awaiting us, I could feel nothing but hope as my lips tingled in remembrance of hers. I knew I was selfish. I knew this would be a challenge. But Bella's hand in mine did not allow room for worry. And her kiss had sealed my fate. There was no erasing her from my life now. I couldn't bear it. And from the way she held my hand - urgently, afraid I would disappear if she let me go - I knew she couldn't bear it either.

Coming to the front door of the house, I felt Bella tremble beside me with the cold and rain. I quickly unlocked the door and brought her inside. An automatic relief washed over me. We truly were safe now. Protected by these walls of my childhood and the legal gifts of private property laws. I let out a long breath of relief as we slipped off our wet shoes.

"Edward," Bella gasped. "This place...it's _beautiful._"

I watched her carefully, observing her face as she walked slowly around the living room. I followed her silently, watching her look at old family photos hanging on the walls. I had only ever brought one girl to this house. Tanya had been the longest relationship I'd ever been in. I remembered her reaction to this house after living in LA for so long. She'd been polite with my family, but her sincerity was shallow. She engaged my mother in conversation by asking about the brand names of the furniture and the decor. Bella, on the other hand, went straight to these old pictures, eager to know my history instead.

I flipped on lights and got the heater going. I heard her giggle behind me.

"No kicking and banging?" she laughed. I laughed and smiled softly as joined her again in front of the wall of photographs, slipping my hand around hers with the need to touch her overwhelming me again. I peeked at her as she kept her eyes forward on the picture frames, noticing her smile at my touch.

"Is this you?" she asked, pointing at a picture of me with my brother Emmett and my sister Alice. I nodded. I was about twelve in this photo. We were on the beach. Emmet had a bear grip on me and Alice stood beside us giggling. She had on my mother's white, wide brimmed summer hat. Even then she was concerned with fashion.

I showed Bella quickly around the house, knowing we both needed to get dry. I led her upstairs and carefully into my room. I was suddenly nervous. I didn't want her to think I expected anything from her. That didn't stop me from wanting to make love to her right then and there. But I was trying really hard to do this the right way. For her.

"Here's the bathroom...There's towels in this cabinet" I said to her, pulling down thick terry cloth towels and wrapping one around her. She looked up at me lovingly and our eyes lingered on each others. I touched her cheek lightly. Her nose was pink with the cold and wet. Her clothes clung to her body, tempting me by further revealing her shape. She was incredibly sexy.

I wanted to _kiss_ her. I wanted her in my arms. I wanted to feel her skin on mine.

Thunder cracked above the house, shaking me from my trance. Bella jumped, startled, then started to laugh, embarrassed.

I reached into my drawers and pulled out some old clothes.

"All I have here at the house are summer clothes," I explained as I handed her one of my T-shirts and a pair of basketball shorts. "But there's plenty of blankets downstairs."

"Okay," she said warmly. "I'll meet you down there."

I changed into my dry clothes and raced downstairs to wait for her, starting up the fireplace in the living room. I put on a pot of coffee and looked out the kitchen window into the woods. The rain was still coming down hard. _Good old Forks_.

I heard the stairs squeak and turned around to see Bella, swimming in my clothes and yet...looking as though they belonged on her. She joined me in the kitchen smiled thankfully as I poured her a hot cup of coffee.

Wrapped in blankets we sat down in front of the fire. Now we were closer than we had been on our blanket in the meadow, the hesitance to be physically close had diminished.

"What are you going to do about your car?" she asked, taking a sip of coffee.

"Probably call the rental place and have them pick it up. I still can't believe those guys found us."

"It was kind of exciting really," Bella said with a soft laugh. I knew she was trying to make me feel better. I could barely smile back as I imagined what would have happened if they had found us. Bella read my face immediately.

"What is it?" she asked gently.

"I feel so incredibly stupid." I admitted. "I didn't think first. They would have been all over you, Bella. All _over_ you. One shot is all it takes and the world suddenly takes hold of everything. No privacy, no secrets, no escape from the media...."

She listened to me intently, scanning my face, eyes laced with concern for me. _For me_. I reached up to touch her sweet face, watching in delight as my fingertips set her cheek aflame.

"I couldn't let them do that to you, Bella. Just being around me is dangerous for you." I explained. I saw a flicker of panic in her eyes. I realized that to her, my words were leading to a goodbye. A goodbye neither of us were ready for.

I laughed, trying to break the tension in the air. "Maybe you _are_ a magnet for bad luck. Look what I've done in only three days." She did not laugh, but her gaze never left my face.

My breath hitched in my throat as she moved closer to me, her face inches from mine.

"I don't know how I could _ever_ consider you bad luck, Edward Cullen." Her eyes searched mine . Those big, brown eyes hypnotizing me. "It's too soon to explain how I feel about you Edward, I still can't figure it out myself." She smiled and reached up to cup my face in her hand.

"All I know is that I _want_ to figure it out. _With you_." she breathed. "Please...don't disappear yet."

My heart swelled in my chest, trying to burst from my rib cage. My hand reached out to rest on the soft curve of her neck, our faces slowly closing the distance between us. Her lips were warm and so soft, gently touching mine. We kissed slowly, sensually, the passion building gradually. As our lips danced, my tongue traced her bottom lip, begging to kiss her deeper, and truer. I wrapped my arms around her, needing to feel her close to me, to feel her warmth. One of her hands tangled itself in my hair, the other rested over my heart. The heart that was racing, threatening to pound its way out of my chest.

_Bella..._Her name was pulsing through me. In this moment there was nothing in the world but _her_.

**Hope everybody had a happy holiday! Will update again soon. In the mean time, check out the song Better Man by James Morrison. **_**So**_** Edward. R&R :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**BPOV**

I could kiss Edward forever. I really could. There was nothing in the world like kissing him. Any fear or doubt, any worries that could possibly enter my mind were instantly left in a fog as soon as his lips touched mine. All I could feel was electricity igniting this powerful passion within me. A passion I had never experienced. I couldn't get enough of him.

I had panicked as he expressed his guilt over the lifestyle that could so drastically effect me. His words were filled with goodbyes. How could this end without us knowing - _truly_ knowing- where it could go? I worried about him. I felt the sorrow and the injustice of it all. I could see in his eyes that this wasn't the first time his status in the media had ruined something genuine and good for him.

I was determined then to keep him here, even if for just a while longer. I didn't want to look back on this in wonder. My kiss was a plea. I was begging him not to disappear as quickly as he had come into my life. I had to know if this was real. If this could last. If this could be_ it_.

Because right now, there was nothing in the world but Edward. That had to mean _something_.

I pulled away for a moment to scan his face. He looked upon me with nothing but adoration.

But soon, as we both floated down to reality, his eyes became torn once again.

"I don't want to disappear, Bella God, especially not after this..." he spoke softly. "But I don't think I could forgive myself if anything happened to you." He looked at me as though in pain. His green eyes piercing right through me.

My whole body was on edge, every nerve, every muscle stiffening with desperation. _He couldn't leave._ Suddenly, I almost wanted to cry. I could feel my eyes become glassy and I blinked a few times, determined not to become an silly, emotional mess. I was half in shock that I was having this reaction at all. These three days...something had _happened_. And I wasn't even close to being ready to let it go.

I was bracing myself for him to tell me he couldn't see me anymore. I started to blink again, feeling my throat start to hurt from trying not to cry. I broke my gaze from his, and stared at the fireplace, waiting to hear the words.

But Edward Cullen _was_ full of surprises. I felt his hand under my chin, gently turning my face towards his until our noses were touching and his forehead rested on mine.

"And I _know_ I couldn't forgive myself," he whispered. "If I walked away from this. If I walked away from you, Bella. As selfish as I may be, I don't think I can."

My muscles relaxed instantly, I let out a slow breath of relief, closing my eyes and smiling. The tension in both our bodies had disappeared, leaving us in a comfortable mess of blankets and limbs in front of the fire place.

I leaned my back gently against his chest, finding myself enfolded in his strong arms, his body wrapped protectively around me. And I didn't want to move. Ever.

**Early November**

Time passes so quickly. Even now as I sit in the airport parking lot, I think back on that night and grip Edward's hand even tighter. I remembered staying up for hours into the night full of hope. We had talked about how we could make this work. How we could figure out ways to see each other without being exposed.

I saw him every single day. Soaking up my little moments with him between work, and Mrs. Faye, dealing with Annie, visiting Charlie and making my way out to the Cullen house as often as I possibly could. It was a busy month, but there was nothing in the world I would have changed about it.

The meadow had become our spot. Over the course of his month here, we met there frequently. Sometimes he would sneak up to my apartment to visit when he was feeling especially daring. It didn't matter where we were as long as we were together. When the weather was nice by the shore, we would sail out together in the Cullen's sail boat, or build bonfires on the beach, drinking wine until we were both reduced to a giggling heap of kisses and longing embraces. We watched old movies and listened to music. Edward played piano for me while I made dinner in his kitchen. Everything about him fit me. When I wasn't around him, I wasn't me. I wasn't completely whole.

And now, my heart was aching and my throat was thick with unwanted goodbyes. We sat in the third of his line of rental cars, parked in the airport parking garage. I was dropping him off here so that the mob of paparazzi crowding the airport terminal wouldn't find us and I could have my proper goodbye. I had been dreading this since the moment I met him. He had pushed his month long vacation as long as he could, and now his publicist was dragging him back to work. He wouldn't be able to return until after Christmas.

I wasn't ready for him to leave. Not at all. There was still so much for me to share with him. I wanted him to meet my father. I wanted to show him where I grew up. I wanted to make love to him for the first time. I wanted to keep him here always. It seems we were both selfish human beings, unable to let each other go, even if it _was_ the wiser course of action.

"I hate this. I hate saying goodbye." I muttered. I felt a tear drop and rushed to wipe it away. Edward beat me to it, his hand warm against my cheek.

"I hate it too." he said with a sigh. "I'm not ready to leave."

"And I'm not ready to watch you go." I replied. He lovingly cupped my face in his hands, his green eyes penetrating mine.

"I'll be back before you know it, Bella. I promise you." He was trying to put on a positive face, but I could see the same pain I was feeling reflected in his eyes.

"It seems so far away..." I whimpered, my voice broken with tears. I was suddenly overcome with doubt as I thought of the life he was returning to in L.A. It was _much_ more glamorous than the life I led. Maybe he would be glad to have his old life back. Maybe he would find someone else....someone beautiful and rich. Someone he didn't have to hide with. "How do you know you'll even _want_ to come back by then?"

He studied me, sweeping a strand of hair behind my ear. He held both my hands in his, eyes locked with mine, capturing my full attention.

"Because Bella," he said. "I'm in love with you."

I felt myself gasp slightly. This was the first time he had ever said it. Amidst endless hours with him all through October I had felt these words. I had yearned to tell him, yet I was afraid. We both had been aware of this feeling between us. He had shown me love in all the most beautiful ways. The way he held me, kissed me, called me to make sure I made it home ok, wrapped me in blankets and carried me to bed when I fell asleep by his fireplace. It wasn't until now he had finally spoken the words out loud. He couldn't have chosen a better moment. I needed to hear him say it now more than ever, before he left Forks and didn't return until _January_.

His eyes were triumphant. His face was beaming as the words fell from his lips.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to tell you that." he said, with a grin stretching from ear to ear. The tears that fell from my eyes now were tears of joy. His thumb caressed my cheek, wiping them away. "I am _completely_, and _utterly_ in love with you." He said it again and I could see him reveling at the sound of the words.

"Edward," I threw my arms around him, needing his closeness like I needed oxygen. "I have loved you since the day I _met_ you." I brought my lips to his, intoxicated by this overwhelming love, swelling in my chest. We kissed with a new fierceness, the physical contact empowered by our confessions of love. It wasn't until minutes later we came up for air.

"How am I supposed to let you go now?" I said with a half hearted laugh. I heard plane engines roaring overhead and checked the clock. He had to leave.

"I will be counting the minutes until I get you back in my arms, Isabella Swan." He kissed me again as he opened the passenger door and hopped out, grabbing his bags. He walked around to my driver's side and leaned in the window. "I _love_ you."

"I love you too."

With one more kiss, I was watching him walk away. The bittersweetness of the day was overwhelming me. I cried all the way to the Rental place where I returned the car and called for a cab home.

I came back to Moss Apartments and went to visit Mrs. Faye. More and more she was losing her ability to remain in the present and tonight she wasn't much for conversation. I put her to bed and walked down the hall. I opened the door to my empty apartment, wincing at how painfully mediocre everything suddenly looked to me without Edward. I took a long shower, not even flinching when the hot water fizzled out and turned to cold.

Slipping into my pajamas and into my bed, I stared at the ceiling. Swallowing the emptiness and allowing myself to replay his words in my head. He loved me. _He loved me_. As I repeated the words to myself I knew, this was the only thing that could get me through the weeks ahead. _He loved me._

**Hey guys. Sorry for the delay. Another chapter is well on its way! I'm sorry this chapter ended on sort of a sad note, but I promise you its necessary for the story to keep rolling and for the plot to pick up some speed. I hope I'm doing this ok. Please please review! I'm updating the best I can and your reviews certainly encourage me to speed up the process. Thanks so much!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Bear with me : / This chapter is pretty much groundwork. Next chapter will have all the fluffy goodness you've been waiting for.**

**EPOV**

"Edward...Edward are you listening to me?"

"Yes, Alice. What is it?" I turned to her, trying to hide my annoyance. Christmas shopping with Alice was a painful event for everyone in the family _but_ her. But I hated to break her Christmas spirit.

"Do you think Dad will like the blue or the red?" she asked, holding up two different dress shirts.

"Blue." I answered simply. Emmett had brought his girlfriend Rosalie home for Christmas. While everyone was happy to see him with his first really serious girlfriend, I knew she was his ticket to freedom when Alice recruited us for shopping. I watched through the glass window display as they held hands and walked the strip casually, cups of coffee in their hands. I thought of Bella. As usual, I could think of nothing but her.

I hadn't expected the past month to effect me so much, but _everything _was new to me with Bella. I felt as though I was living life half asleep. My parents had noticed. I was hesitant to spill too much about Bella, but Esme could get anything out of me. When she asked what had me so down, I barely had to explain before she was smiling sweetly at me and saying, "Edward, you are most _definitely_ in love."

Jasper and I were stuck holding bags upon bags of Alice's Christmas gifts. It was lucky he was there to keep me company. His laid back mood was contagious, and extremely helpful when dealing with his high strung wife. In the time I had been home, I noticed more and more the way he truly loved her.

"So, Edward." Jasper looked at me as we followed Alice through racks of clothes and shelves of expensive trinkets. "When do we get to meet this mystery girl?"

I had confided little to Alice and Jasper about Bella when I returned to L.A. I knew Emmett would tease me endlessly if he found out too much. And call me superstitious, but I was desperate not to jinx anything.

"Soon, I hope." I replied. I smiled, imagining her here with me. Alice would adore her.

"How long has it been since you've seen her now?"

"Just over a month." My mind wandered to the parking garage in early November. Since I left Forks, Bella was in everything I did. There wasn't a moment that went by that I didn't think of her. I called her in between photo shoots and movie auditions, whenever I could, just to hear her voice. I would go to parties with Alice and Jasper at expensive hotels or clubs and sit on expensive leather couches...wishing for nothing more than to be sitting on Bella's old pull out. Wishing to be next to her. I slept more now that I was home, hoping that when I closed my eyes I would see her in my dreams.

I looked up to see Jasper winking at Alice.

"What are you guys up to Alice?" I asked suspiciously. She smiled her sweet, innocent smile.

"Nothing, Edward." she giggled. I rolled my eyes at her. Alice always had something up her sleeve. But today I didn't have the energy to try and find out. "What's with you anyway? You've been so out of it since you've been home."

"His heart's somewhere else, Alice." Jasper answered for me, grinning at his wife.

"You really like this girl, huh?"

I couldn't answer her. The word 'like' didn't apply to Bella. I couldn't describe in words the way she made me feel. I guess I didn't have to.

Alice gasped, reading my face and my silence.

"You _love_ her!" she beamed at me. "You love her don't you, Edward!"

I didn't try to fight her.

_____________________________________________________________________

Larry Krutch was my publicist. He was a tall, thin, lanky guy who was always dressed to the nines. He used more product in his hair in one day then I did in an entire lifetime. His nose was beak like and his dark little eyes stared at me from under thin black rimmed glasses. He was the depiction of a Hollywood leech. It was the week before Christmas and Larry and I were out to a lunch meeting. I had just auditioned for the latest in a line of movies that had sent me scripts. Larry was anxious to discuss my "future plans."

"I need you to be ready by 7:30pm on Christmas day so I can have Joe pick you up and take you to the airport. So enjoy your family time before hand. You've got a photo shoot and another audition in Chicago you can't be late for...." he rambled.

I sipped my coffee and patiently listened. In my head I wasn't thinking about the plans he had created for me. I was thinking about how Bella would fit into them. I knew I had to tell Larry - discreetly - that I had a relationship that I needed to make space for in my life. There was no other option. Larry was still talking.

"Now...assuming you land this role with the Carson crew's movie in Chicago, your filming will start in mid January. It should last up to 3-4 months, followed by the press junkets and movie promos...." he explained, tapping his blackberry. "So this audition is critical for the next couple months. You understand, Edward?"

"Yes, yes I understand." I answered. "Larry? Assuming this all happens, how much down time do you think I will have?"

"Well, I can't promise anything, Edward..." he froze, studying me. "Why...?"

I knew he could see my next sentences coming before they even hit the air.

"Well I've met someone." I explained. "I can't give you details, I don't want this going public. But I do need to take necessary measures to make room in my schedule for this. It's extremely important, Larry."

Larry's face twisted to an expression of annoyance.

"Edward, I _highly_ discourage this. How long has this been going on without my knowledge? Who is she? Is she someone well known? Are you back with Tanya?" he was flustered, stammering through sentences and trying to find a solution in his head. "If it's Tanya, maybe we could spin this to look - "

I needed him to understand how serious I was. I felt my voice raise slightly.

"Larry, no. It's not Tanya. She's not a celebrity and I want her to be able to keep her privacy. That is _critical_ to me. I've been seeing her since the end of September."

"Let me get this straight, Edward." he said. "You want me to keep this under wraps when you're the most talked about heart throb in the media right now?"

"Yes, Larry. I do." I said firmly. There was no bending on this. Larry huffed loudly. I could see the frustration written all over him. If he wasn't a cut throat prick I would have felt bad for him. But I had been his stock and trade for long enough to know he owed me this. He knew it too.

His knuckles were white around his blackberry. He let loose a defeated sigh and looked up at me.

"I'll do my best, Cullen." He had on his plastic smile. "I'll try and get you the free time you need. But I still need you at work. That sound alright, Ed?"

I was surprised he was even offering me this much. I reached across the table and shook his hand. I knew it would still be difficult, but this was a significant weight lifted from my shoulders. As soon as I got to my car I called Bella.

"_Really, Edward? But how-_" I drank in the sound of her voice.

"I know it will still be a hassle, but this way I can still see you." I explained. "I can't stand being away from you, Bella. I'll take what I can get from Krutch."

"_I just don't want this to ruin your career. I don't wanna be 'that girl' who makes you choose_." I could hear the love and concern in her voice.

"Trust me, it's gonna work out. I can feel it." It was true. I had never felt more hopeful about this. I dared to believe this could really work.

Christmas Eve rolled around faster than I expected it to. It was mid afternoon and Esme and Alice had us wrapping presents and decorating the house for Alice's annual Christmas bash. I was dreading the party. Our house would be filled with all of Alice's A-list friends. It happened every year. People made their appearances, drank way too much, and didn't leave until the early hours of the morning.

I left Emmett to hang tinsel, getting him back for copping out on Christmas shopping with Alice. I found my way to the piano and sat down at my baby grand. I let myself relax and play a few tunes, some of Esme's favorite Christmas songs.

It felt so good to just play. I had forgotten how much I loved this. I thought back to that day in the elevator...

"_You always have a choice, Edward. Always_."

I smiled to myself. All I had to do was get through Christmas and New Years and then I could finally return to Forks. My mind wandered to Bella, wondering what she was doing right now. Maybe she was with Charlie, or Mrs. Faye. I hoped she wasn't alone.

I envisioned her perfectly in my mind. The shape of her face. The color of her eyes. The curves of her body...the perfect shape of her hip...

Someone behind me cleared their throat.

I turned to see my family standing in the doorway, all of them smirking at me.

"What are you looking at?" I asked, embarrassed.

"Can I tell him, Mom?" Alice begged. "Pleeeeeeeaseeee."

Esme sighed, giving in and handing Alice a blue envelope with a ribbon tied around it. Alice skipped her way over to me and placed it in my hand.

"What is this?"

"Open it!" she was practically singing. I untied the ribbon and opened the envelope to find a single plane ticket. A ticket...to_ Washington_. I looked up at my parents, shock slapped across my face. Even Emmett was smiling. _Alice has the biggest mouth_.

"It's from all of us, Edward. Merry Christmas." my mother smiled.

"That's right." chimed Alice. "Your bag is already packed and Dad's taking you to the airport." I looked up to see my father jingling his car keys and winking at me.

"But - what about Christmas with you guys? Alice, your party - " I stammered.

"Oh please, Edward. I've had enough of your moping around the house. I know you don't want to go. I've made you come every year even though I know you hate it. I think you can skip just this once." said Alice.

"But tomorrow, Larry has me going to Chicago and I -"

"Son," I felt my father's hand on my shoulder. "This kind of stuff doesn't happen every day. _Don't let it go_."

I didn't need to hear another word. My plane was leaving in an hour.

**R&R :) Next chapter is going to be flufftastttic... Oh and just a side note...keep an eye out for Larry Krutch...you haven't seen the last of him.**


	13. Chapter 13

**BPOV**

I stood at the entrance to Moss Apartments, waving goodbye to Charlie and Sue as the cruiser pulled away from the curb. Snow was falling outside and the street lights flickered. When dad's tail lights disappeared I let myself inside and started up the stairs, dragging a bag of gifts behind me. Charlie had been too generous this year. But spending Christmas Eve with my dad was something I looked forward to every year.

It was around ten at night. I put an ear to Mrs. Faye's door. The silence I heard reassured me she was asleep in bed. Smiling to myself, I continued on to my apartment and let myself inside.

I was actually quite proud of my little apartment during Christmas time. I had my christmas lights lining my windows and illuminating the apartment. The kids had made me paper snowflakes that now hung from my ceiling over my bed. It was simple and beautiful. I loved it. I thought of Edward, wishing he could see how my 'hole-in-the-wall' apartment had transformed. Granted, I still had to jump my heater to get it to work...but still, it was quite the improvement.

I checked my cell phone. No calls. I had been anxious to hear his voice all day long. I tried calling in the late afternoon but got his voice mail. It was strange not to hear from him. Especially on Christmas eve. But I remembered him telling me about Alice's Christmas party and figured he would call in the morning. Still, my heart sank.

I set down my bag and unloaded gifts from Charlie and Sue. I even had a package mailed from Renee. Charlie had given me the annual bottle of pepper spray, along with some new paint brushes and the collected works of some of my favorite poets. Sue had given me an electric blanket - which I immediately plugged in and placed on the couch, letting it warm up as I changed into my pajamas.

Renee had sent me a new set. I was delighted to put away my tattered shirts and old sweat pants and slip into soft red pajama pants and a long sleeved thermal. I looked in the mirror and smiled. For once I didn't look like a raggedy anne doll.

After brushing my teeth and letting my hair down, I pulled out the couch and curled up in my electric blanket. What a relief to finally have some decent warmth in this place. The room itself was freezing as usual. Often when I went to bed, I imagined Edward beside me and for a moment, I could pretend I was warm.

I looked at my cell phone, sitting idly on my nightstand. How I _lived _for his phone calls. The past month had been hard. Work was taking its toll on me. I was working especially hard to make ends meet this month. With more crime happening around the Rec center, I had lost of few of my regulars. They of course had been so grateful and sweet, thanking me for all I had done. I didn't blame them for their choice. This part of town wasn't as safe as it used to be. That was life.

I ended up picking up a part time job as a waitress at a diner around the corner. I was desperate for the extra money. I hadn't told Edward. There was no need for him to worry. He had his career to worry about and I was convinced I could take care of myself.

As I stared up at the snowflakes hanging from the ceiling, I was trying to convince myself again. It wasn't working so well. I needed him. When I closed my eyes at night I would pretend he was next to me. When I woke up in the morning, I would imagine him there beside me. When I went to work I wondered what he was doing. If he was ok. If he missed me. Every time my phone rang, my heart would _fly_.

I jumped suddenly as the door buzzer went off. Who would be buzzing me to get into the building at this time of night? Frustrated, I lifted myself out of my warm bed and pressed down the call button. Maybe Barty was drunk again.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"_Bella_," came a familiar velvet voice. My jaw dropped.

"Edward?!"

I heard him laughing through the speakers. "_Bella, I -_"

I didn't need to hear another word. I stopped only to fix my hair in the mirror and then I _flew_ out the door. Racing down the stairs I could hardly contain my heart rate. _He was here_. He was here! I stumbled as I hit level ground. Frantically finding my footing, I made it to the front door and wrenched it open.

My hand came to my mouth as I gasped. _There he was_. Just as beautiful as ever, standing on the stoop with his bags in the snow. _There he was._ With his breathtaking, crooked grin. Snapping to attention, I grabbed his hand, pulling him in out of the cold.

"Wh- What are you doing here?" I asked, smiling so wide my face hurt, still breathless. In one smooth motion, he dropped his bags to the floor, wrapped his arms around me and _kissed me senseless_. If it weren't for his strong arms gripping my lower back, I would have been a puddle on the floor. I was so happy I wanted to cry. _ Here he was_, his lips on mine, his hand touching my face and neck, his arm encircling me completely. I was reeling in this moment. I threw my arms around his neck and pressed myself closer to him feeling the hardness of his chest and the beat of his racing heart.

We pulled away when we remembered the need for oxygen. Both of us were breathing erratically, staring at each other so intensely. Our eyes were wide with joy. It was like seeing him for the first time. _There was no way I was going to sleep tonight_.

As I helped Edward drag his bags towards the elevator, he explained the gift his family had given him for Christmas. As soon as the rusty old doors closed and the elevator began to move, I wrapped my body around his once again and whispered in his ear.

"Remind me to send them a thank you card."

Our lips crashed together. Our mouths exploring each others wildly, as if for the first time. I felt Edward moan softly into my mouth as he lifted me up, wrapping my legs around his waist and pressing my back to the wall. His hands began to roam up my sides. I reveled in the perfect pressure behind his hands as they traveled up my body. He paused, pulling way and searching my eyes.

"Bella..." I answered his hesitance with an encouraging kiss, my tongue dancing with his.

The ding of the elevator shook us from our reverie as we reached my floor. We were trying to strangle our laughter as we raced down the hallway to my door, both of us shaking with smiles.

Safe inside, his bags hit the floor and I brought his face to mine once again.

"I can't believe you're actually _here_..." I said between kisses. His nose was pink with the cold. He was overwhelmingly handsome as he paused to look down at my face. My heart was glowing at the way he was looking at me. His eyes looked me over as if I were an angel, as if I were the only woman in the world. He pulled me too him, hugging me against his chest and kissing my hair.

"I can't tell you how much I've missed you, Bella..."

I pulled back slowly, letting go of him. He looked at me, confused at the abrupt ending to our physical contact.

As I looked into his beautiful green eyes, I knew exactly what I wanted. I felt nothing but love for this man in front of me. And now that he was here..._really here_...I knew what I wanted.

Slowly, I reached up and unzipped his jacket, gently pushing it off his shoulders until it hit the floor. He smiled at me, still perplexed.

"Then don't tell me, Edward. _Show me_."

I could see the surprise in his eyes flicker only for a moment before turning into a smoldering smile. He reached for my hand, pulling me to him until our lips were only centimeters away. His hand reached up to stroke my cheek.

"You're sure?" he whispered. I could only nod yes, I could barely remember to breathe.

He finally closed the gap between us, his lips covering mine in a slow, longing kiss. I felt his hands trail from my cheek down to my neck. He was taking his time, driving me crazy with want. Yet, I couldn't urge him to move any faster than he was. He had me bewitched. I was intoxicated by every lingering touch.

I hadn't realized we were moving until I felt the back of my knees touch the bed. I let myself relax, falling back onto the warm blankets, guided by his strong arms. Edward's body was on top of me. He was careful not to let his full weight rest on me, his body a perfect pressure against mine as he continued to kiss me even deeper.

My hands fumbled to find the hem of his shirt in the near darkness. The christmas lights were the only light in the room, making beautiful patterns on Edward's bare skin as I pulled off his shirt. His body was just as beautiful as his face. Skin flawless. Perfectly proportioned. Muscles moving underneath his alabaster skin.

My thermal shirt lifted slightly as I threw his shirt on the floor, revealing a sliver of skin. Edward's hands found my exposed stomach and traced circles on it, making me shiver at his touch. Leaning down ever so gently, he left soft, open mouthed kisses on my abdomen. His mouth followed his hands as he slowly lifted my shirt higher and higher until I lay exposed before him.

He allowed me no time to be self conscious before he kissed me again saying, "Bella, you're _perfect._" He kissed his way up my neck to the sensitive spot behind my ear as he whispered seductively. "_I love everything about you_."

"_Edward..._" I breathed his name, quivering as his mouth left a trail down my neck all the way to my breasts where he lavished me with attention. Goosebumps covered my entire body as a moan escaped my mouth.

In one graceful movement, he flipped us over. I was glad for the sudden leverage. I hovered over him, able to give him my full attention. I heard his breath hitch in his throat as I kissed his neck and my hands simultaneously fell on the waistband of his jeans.

I lost track of all time and space, surrendering to this current of passion between us. With his skin on mine, my mind was lost in an ecstasy I had never truly experienced before. Second, minutes, hours, held no significance here. There was nothing but us. We abandoned the rest of clothes, seeking refuge under the warmth of the blankets and the heat of each other's bodies. I reveled in the sound of my name on his lips, feeling powerful as my hands roamed his naked body.

"_God, _Bella_.._."

The feel of his hands on me had me spinning. He knew just where to touch me, just how to drive me absolutely insane with desire - with need. I was aching for him.

"Please, Edward. I need you..." I begged in a whisper. "Make love to me."

There was no teasing. There was only love in his eyes as our bodies aligned themselves and then became one. He fit me so perfectly. It was as if our bodies had been made to correspond. The twinkling christmas lights danced across our skin as we found our rhythm. I could feel every nerve ending, my entire body coming to life where we were connected. Again, time was lost. His lips never once left my skin or my lips as we moved together. I could feel myself getting closer and closer to the edge.

"Let go, Bella. Let go for me." he whispered.

It wasn't hard to give him what he wanted. Crying out his name I felt the waves of pleasure crash over me. I heard my name leave his lips as he too let go and followed me over the edge.

As I lay there that night, tucked perfectly beside him and surrounded by his strong arms...I knew there wasn't a single part of me that didn't belong to him. Mind, body and soul...I was his. We stared at each other for a long time, unable to erase the reverent smiles on our faces.

"I love you." I whispered, reaching up and caressing his sweet face.

"As I love you, Bella." he answered. "Merry Christmas."

Sleep came for us, sweeping away the day and leaving us perfectly entangled under the electric blanket. I found myself dreaming vividly in time to the beat of his heart. Even lost in my subconscious, the sound of it left me comforted...knowing he would still be there when I awoke.

**Hope it was the fluff you were looking for. :) Please please review. **


	14. Chapter 14

**EPOV**

The sun trickled through Bella's window and onto her perfect skin, causing every inch of her to glow. The sunlight was a rare commodity in Forks, but it had chosen a perfect day to appear. Christmas morning.

I let my eyes drink in the beauty beside me. I listened to the sound of her even breath and felt the gentle rhythm of her heart beat pressed against me. Her long silky hair fell in a beautiful mess about her shoulders. My heart skipped a beat when I heard her mumble my name and clutch tighter to me in her sleep.

This was Heaven.

Outside I could see snow falling outside and hear the cars in the street. Even the ordinary things had become moments I cherished when I was beside Bella. She was changing my world completely. I breathed deliberately in and out, letting myself just feel everything about this single moment in time.

I never wanted to forget this.

My mind wandered to the night before. To the way Bella had said my name. To the way she had needed me and I her. To the way I felt completely whole as our bodies had molded together in perfect harmony. I knew from our long conversations and endless hours of talking that both of us weren't unfamiliar with sex. But it was clear that this was a first. It was the first time either of us had ever really made love. I marveled at how different it felt to truly be in love with someone.

I felt Bella stir beside me and glanced down to see if she was awake.

Sure enough, those mesmerizing brown eyes were fixed on mine. Her expression was one of pure happiness.

"You're still here." she grinned wildly.

"Where else would I be?" I laughed. She sat up, holding the sheets to her chest with one hand, and running her fingers lovingly through my hair with the other.

"I just can't believe you showed up last night. On Christmas eve. To be with _me_." She ducked her head for a moment, a blush rising in her cheeks. "Definitely the best Christmas present I've ever gotten."

I sat up to look her in the eye, my fingertips brushing her cheek. "You are, by far, the greatest gift I have _ever_ received, Bella Swan." I kissed her softly. "I can't believe you're mine."

Her smile made my heart _burst_.

I watched as she leaned her body over me and the side of the bed to grab my shirt off the floor. The sheets tugged, caught beneath us, exposing more and more of her flesh to me as she found what she was looking for.

My breath caught in my throat as she let the sheet fall completely, moving to put my shirt on. Her body was perfection. It was even more tantalizing to me now than the night before. _Could I love her anymore?_

Her eyes never left mine as she buttoned up the shirt, a seductive smile gracing her lips as she watched me. When she reached the higher buttons I felt myself almost whimper as her skin disappeared beneath that damned fabric. She must have noticed because she laughed and unbuttoned the top again, leaving plenty of alabaster skin for me to rest my eyes on. She leaned down gracefully and placed kisses on my bare chest.

"How long can I keep you?" she asked playfully between kisses.

_Forever_.

My mind shot to Larry Krutch. I had to get on a plane tonight. I checked the clock. It was around 10:30am. I roughly calculated the time I had left with Bella as I factored in the travel schedule. Of course I could never get enough time with Bella. But as I looked at her beautiful face I knew I couldn't waste this day. I couldn't do it. Chicago would have to wait.

I realized she was still waiting for my answer. Smiling brightly at her, I reached for my phone on her night stand and dialed Larry Krutch's number. Bella looked at me excitedly, anticipating exactly what I was about to do. I smiled back at her, grinning widely. She knew I was hers for the day before the second ring.

Immediately she was showering me with more kisses and giggling with joy. I was also overcome with happiness and had to try my best to concentrate when Larry answered...that was very hard to do with Bella running her hands over my chest and placing warm, wet kisses on my neck.

"Edward?"

"Hi, Larry." I answered. "Merry Christmas."

"Ah yes, Merry Christmas to you too. Hope you're getting ready for your flight tonight."

"Well, see thats actually why I'm calling. I wont be able to make it to the airport tonight."

"What!? What do you mean! Joe is picking you up remember?" I could hear his panic on the phone but could barely register his voice as Bella's tongue met the sensitive spot behind my ear.

"I-I'm in Washington, Larry."

"WHAT!? Edward you _can't_ be serious. I understood when you needed some alone time in Forks back in September, but you need to be back at work now. This is important!"

"I understand Larry, and I am very sorry about this. But the trip here was a gift from my family. A very gracious one at that. I couldn't say no." Bella giggled softly against my neck.

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone. Bella was now straddling my waist and looking down at me with a sparkle in her eyes. Her small, delicate hands were popping open the buttons of my shirt at a painfully slow pace.

I didn't wait for Larry to respond.

"Enjoy the day with your family, Larry. I'm sure they will love to know that they have an entire Christmas with you. When I get back we'll work things out, I know I have more scripts to read through back at my apartment. Merry Christmas."

I hurriedly hung up the phone and wrapped my arms around Bella, feeling her body hum with laughter as she squealed with delight. I wasn't going _anywher_e.

______________________________________________________________________

**Larry Krutch POV**

As I heard the phone go dead, I slammed it to the counter top. My wife looked up at me, alarmed.

"Larry...it's Christmas. Please, put the phone away. Just for one day." she pleaded with me.

But I had no room fro her complaints. I ignored her and walked into my home office. Edward Cullen was costing me time, patience and money. This would _not_ do.

I knew he was with _her_. Whoever the hell she was. Even if her hushed laughter had escaped my ears, I could still hear it in his voice. He sounded like a love-struck idiot.

Huffing, I paced my office. Edward Cullen was paying my bills. The less he worked, the less money came rolling in to me. I looked around at my beautiful loft apartment, luxuriously decorated and designed. I wasn't going this give this up. There was so much more I wanted. So much more.

The casino was calling my name again. Losing a couple grand last weekend had put a damper on my holiday spirit. My wife had constantly scolded me about my gambling. But that was an easy problem to fix when I lied and told her I had stopped going.

I wasn't going to fall out of this lifestyle I had built for myself, even if I had cheated here and there to get to it. I went from a PR man to Edward Cullen's publicist. I went from shitty complexes to studio apartments in New York City. I had a maid for Christssake! Money in my bank account was important in order to keep this status. I sure as hell wasn't going to lose all of this because _Edward Cullen_ had decided he was in_ love_.

It was a risk I wasn't willing to take.

That's _exactly_ why I decided that this was a game I had to fix in my favor.

That's _exactly_ why I decided that this relationship had to be destroyed. Now.

That's _exactly _why I graciously dealt with the Carson crew in Chicago over the phone, explaining Edward's absence.

And that's _exactly_ why I leafed through the Cullen's contact book and found Tanya Denali's number.

**Hey guys. I'm sorry this is a short one but I needed to update! I owe it to you! I have been away with the family for some holiday happenings and was dying to get back to this story! Its almost 4am but I couldn't **_**not**_** post. You guys have been far too patient and kind to me. Next chapter will be significantly longer seeing as the plot is about to get a **_**whole**_** lot thicker. muahahaha**

**R&R :) **


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey everybody. Alright, so after looking at the reviews and getting a few weird PMs, there are a few things I should probably clarify.**

**1) I'm not interested in writing thoroughly predictable stories. Though the story may seem "oh-so-typical" thus far, thats exactly where I want this to go before things start to take a turn. I'm interested in real, unconventional love. I think I've done fairly well with the real part... but I'm just getting started with the unconventional. I have barely begun to put my spin into this story so please, just keep reading before telling me I'm "unoriginal." It makes me want to stop writing all together.**

**2) Larry Krutch is a character I have hardly even scratched the surface of. So if you feel the need to jump to conclusions about a character I have hardly revealed, then go ahead. Just don't do it in a discouraging review or pm before I have even finished the story. If you are still disappointed after its all over then go ahead and rip it apart by all means. I could care less. All I'm asking for is a little patience. I can take criticism easily, but when it's premature I'll defend myself. I'm sure anyone here who has written a fanfic can relate.**

**So to those of you who have been sticking with me and giving me real constructive criticism - thank you. I appreciate it more than you know and I do my best to improve with your help. This story has already been planned out so everything that I write is there for a **_**reason**_**. I can't wait for you to see what's coming next! Peace, Love and Edward Cullen, baby.**

**BPOV**

I shivered in the cold January wind as I marched through the snow to the Rec center. Getting out of bed had been especially difficult as the harsh winter settled in on Forks. The only thing that made it remotely easy to drag myself out of bed in the morning was knowing that Edward wouldn't be beside me. If he wasn't there, I had no reason to stay.

January was reaching its end and things had become increasingly bleak in Forks. When I felt the weight of it pressing down on me, I simply thought back to Christmas day. A day of love making, of warmth, of pure happiness. Even though Edward had to leave the very next morning, my heart had been full to the brim. Saying goodbye hurt both of us, but I could see a new hope in his eyes. Nothing brought me greater joy and reassurance.

I kept my head low against the icy wind as I passed three men on the corner. The smoke from their cigarettes made thick hazy patterns in the wind. I had seen them around before and made sure to keep my distance. I recognized one of them as Roy, Annie's skinny, pale, twitchy boyfriend. He shook constantly. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was long and thin. When the weather was nicer and he came to visit Annie, I could see the track marks on his arms under his t-shirt. He was the typical junkie.

Roy nodded to me as I passed them and turned towards the front door of the Rec. He knew who I was by now, but I was sure he didn't like me. Once in a while I would catch him with Annie outside of Mrs. Faye's room. He would push her roughly against the walls whenever he kissed her and always had a tight grip on her wrists. Annie seemed to love it. But to me, it seemed to hostile and strange. I thought of the way Edward held me and touched me, always treating me like I was the most important being in the world, like I was something to be treasured instead of _used_. Anything else seemed so foreign and wrong to me.

Nodding politely in return, I grabbed the handle of the heavy front door and wrenched it open, getting inside as fast as I could.

"Morning, Bella." Rita smiled at me from the front desk. She was a sweet woman, always greeting people with a smile and a warm welcome. However, lately, the smile on her face rarely reached her eyes. The Rec was starting to fall under. She and the rest of the staff were fighting to keep the place alive. But day after day we lost more kids. The dance class had only 8 children left. The kickball team wasn't big enough to play anymore. The game rooms were usually close to empty. And my art class had dwindled down to 6. Not to mention the building was falling apart. Pipes leaked and sometimes even burst. The basement was overrun with mold and asbestos.

This side of Forks was falling fast. And as I said good morning to Rita I sensed a fresh wound was in the making. She was even more solemn today than usual. She reached into a stack of papers and pulled a note out for me. It was a thank you note from the Jenkins' family. Aiden was going to attend a different school district and wouldn't be returning to the Rec.

"I'm sorry, Bells." she said. "We've lost another one. This part of town just isn't safe anymore. Nobody wants their children around drug dealers and thieves."

"Thieves?" I had been aware of the drug trafficking that was slowly consuming the streets outside the Rec, but I wasn't aware of any robberies.

"Stan's corner store was robbed last night." Rita replied sadly. I gasped. "And to make matters worse..."

She pulled out the cash drawer. It was empty. The lock had been shot off, stray bullet holes graced the side of the metal box.

"...Our fundraising money has been stolen too."

I immediately felt sick to my stomach. My head was literally swimming with thought. I clutched the front desk to keep myself from falling. I could see in Rita's eyes that this was the last straw. She was giving up. We couldn't fight this anymore. Her eyes were brimming with tears. I threw my arms around her as she wept into my jacket.

"I've been working her for over 15 years." she cried. "This place has _saved_ kids. It has always been a safe haven. And now...it's being swallowed up by this damn town and I can't do anything about it..."

I was heartbroken. This was my life. We had all fought so hard to keep the Rec afloat. That fundraising money was the fruits of our labor. In minutes it was _gone_. I couldn't wrap my head around the injustice of it all. _How could this happen?_

"How long, Rita?" I asked softly, gently rubbing her back.

"We close in two weeks."

______________________________________________________________________

On the way home that day I stopped by the diner to let my boss know I'd be able to start full time in two weeks. He was a short, round man named Joe, who had been very gracious to me when I started to work there. His sister was Noah's mother. She had sent him a sparkling letter of recommendation for me after leaving the Rec, knowing that there was plenty of struggle ahead for the staff there.

With a heavy heart, I trudged through the snow back to the apartment building. My mind mulled over every possible solution I could think of. Who could I write to? What state rep would give the Rec some money to clean up and stay in business? Where could we fundraise without being stolen from?

I must have worked myself up a bit too much, because I soon felt my stomach turn and my mind fog with dizziness, just as I had earlier that day at work. When it passed I started to cry. This was all proving to be too much for me. It was so _unfair_.

I decided to take the elevator up to my floor, hoping I wouldn't get dizzy again. I tried concentrating on something else, anything else, so I wouldn't get worked up a third time. My mind focused on Edward. I smiled to myself as the elevator moved beneath me. I wanted to call him. I wanted to tell him what was happening. But something in me was telling me not to.

As much as I knew that Edward and I made each other completely and totally happy, I couldn't help but feel as though I was holding him back. Maybe it was because he was gone so much that I allowed myself to doubt, but this feeling was always present in the back of my mind. I thought about his life in L.A. About how he had to work _so hard_ to keep me safe. He had made so many sacrifices to keep me out of the public eye, to give me normalcy and yet at the same time...to love me _unconditionally_.

I couldn't help but feel like I was making his life hard for him. But when he heard my worried voice over the phone, he would erase my fears with just the sound of my name on his lips. "Bella, I_ love_ you."

He made me forget the reality of our circumstances by loving me so completely and so tenderly. I felt selfish sometimes. But Edward was constantly assuring me that it was worth it. That nothing made him happier. As I stared at the elevator floor, my heart ached for him.

_Maybe I should call_...

I went to reach for my cell phone but thought twice. Edward was in the middle of shooting for a new film in Chicago. Mr. Krutch had been so wonderful to him when he returned to L.A. He had even worked out a deal with the crew in Chicago, allowing Edward to audition late. Edward, of course, landed the role. I decided I would call later to check in, not wanting to ruin any filming with the sound of my phone call.

The elevator dinged loudly, announcing my arrival on the fifth floor. I found my keys and quietly made my way to my apartment. Without even pulling out the bed, I immediately collapsed on the couch and fell asleep, overwhelmed and exhausted with the stress of the day. Sleep was the only way to escape it. I dreamt of Edward's arms around me.

"_You're safe, remember?" _he whispered to me in my dreams.

______________________________________________________________________

"I'm so sorry, Bells." said Charlie. He sat across from me at the diner. I had just gotten out of work and he had come to visit for a cup of coffee and bite to eat.

"It's okay, Dad." I tried to assure him. "Things will get better. They always do."

The two remaining weeks of open doors at the Rec center had flown by too quickly. It was February now and the Rec was just an empty building on the corner of Bakers Street.

"I know, honey. I know they will." Charlie held my hand and gave it a soft squeeze. "But if you need anything you have to tell me. You've always been stubborn as your mother. If you need help, don't you hesitate to ask. Especially now."

I smiled warmly up at my father. He was such a good man. We ate a light dinner and caught up a bit. He and Sue were doing well. She took such great care of him. His eyes sparkled as he spoke of her.

"I hope one day, Bella, you'll find someone to love you like that." Charlie said. It was a strange, sentimental admission coming from Chief Swan, but I could see that he meant it. "Someone to take care of you."

My thoughts immediately flew to Edward. He had been working so hard lately. Shooting the movie was taking it out of him. His phone calls were usually late in the evening or early in the morning. I could hear his exhaustion over the phone and I fought hard to swallow the guilt that overwhelmed me. When he promised he would call, he kept his promise, no matter how tired he was. I was still in awe that he loved me so devotedly. I looked at my father and felt overwhelmed. I wanted to tell him so badly about Edward. To tell him I wasn't alone. As I rationalized in my head, I realized I could tell him bits and pieces. I just couldn't say anything along the lines of... "Hey Dad, I've secretly been dating _Edward Cullen_ since September and I'm madly in love with him."

Instead I simply said, "Well, Dad, I _have_ been seeing someone lately." Charlie immediately looked up from his coffee mug, raising an eyebrow at me. "His name is Edward."

"When do I get to meet this guy?" he asked. "Is he good to you? Cuz if he's not I'll - "

"Dad," I laughed, silencing his worries. I imagined Edward's handsome face in my head as I explained. "He is the most... _wonderful_ man I have ever met." I said the words softly, reverently. Charlie could see in me how sincere I was and a grin crept across his face.

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you were in love, Bells."

I took a sip of coffee, feeling myself blush furiously.

"I am, Dad." I answered. "I am."

Charlie smiled widely at me and sat back in his chair, relaxing. I could see he was happy for me. I knew he recognized in me the same emotion he had for Sue. I let myself relax as well, thrilled to have at least one person know the truth. I was at ease knowing that person was my father, the one I trusted most.

The past few weeks had been filled with stress. Worry upon worry had piled themselves on my shoulders. And as much as I knew I should have, I didn't tell Edward. I couldn't. When he asked how things were over the phone, I had assured him they were the same as usual. I was banking on things turning around before he could find out the truth. So, I let it all out over dinner with Charlie. Relieved that one person would know. One person wouldn't tell Edward. Relieved that finally I could get it all out of my system. It was all becoming too much to keep inside my brain anymore.

I sat with my father for a long time, feeling so grateful for his presence in my life. When he drove me home, I felt lighter. I felt as though I had found some kind of temporary balance. I hugged him fiercely before I said goodbye and climbed the stairs to my apartment.

I was surprised to see Roy and Annie outside Mrs. Faye's door. He usually didn't visit this late at night and if he did, they were usually sucking face outside the apartment. I pretended not to notice as I unlocked my door and hurried inside. Instead of their usual make out session, the two were talking in low, hushed voices. I couldn't make out what they were saying, but Roy was angry. He was talking through his teeth.

I crossed my fingers, hoping Annie was breaking it off with him. As much as she was a terrible nurse, I felt sorry for her. The way Roy treated her was awful, whether she noticed it or not. And of course, I didn't want him hanging around Mrs. Faye anymore. I didn't trust him.

It got quiet in the hallway again and I rolled my eyes when I heard the usual lip smacking resume. Some things never change.

The next morning was my day off. I had been working 12 hour shifts 7 days a week as soon as the Rec closed in order to make rent and still have enough money for groceries. Joe caught me in the middle of a dizzy spell one morning and told me to take a day for myself. I didn't try to fight him. So today I took some time to clean up the apartment, do laundry, visit Mrs. Faye and work on a few small paintings.

I let myself focus on the artwork in the afternoon, getting lost in it completely. I heard Louis Armstrong playing through the walls from Mrs. Faye's apartment and smiled to myself as I cleaned my brushes. _La Vie en Rose_ floated through the thin layers of drywall and filled my apartment with soft, sweet jazz. I closed my eyes and thought of Edward, remembering the sound of his voice this morning over the phone, and how cute he was when he was sleepy.

The sound of the door buzzer shook me from my thoughts. I got up and pressed down the call button.

"Hello?"

"Hello there," came a smooth, cheerful voice. "Is this Bella Swan?"

"Yes it is, can I help you?"

"Yes, I believe you can." the voice said politely. "If you would buzz me up I would love to speak with you, Miss Swan."

"May I ask who this is?" I couldn't place this voice. They sounded nice enough, but I certainly didn't recognize whoever was down at the front doors waiting to come up and see me.

"Ah, I'm sorry I've forgotten to introduce myself." the voice chuckled softly. "My name is Larry Krutch."

**This chapter is probably more fluffless than I know you would prefer, however...this chapter and next two are extremely important to the plot. Stick it out because this is about to turn into a bumpy ride. I promise you won't be sorry. Love always finds a way. I will be updating very quickly. Expect another chapter later today!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Larry POV**

I felt the dice cupped perfectly in my hands and I was on top of the _world_. Somewhere in the back of my head I could hear my wife's voice telling me to walk away from the tables, but I didn't listen. I was in too deep now. _Just one more roll. Just one more roll_... I couldn't give this up.

My wife Karen was a good person. And good people were the easiest to lie to. I laughed to myself as I took a sip of my white russian. It was just so goddamn easy.

It was just as easy to find out where this mystery girl lived too. When Edward got back from his little Christmas stunt, I was the picture of understanding and kindness. Rescheduling his audition, always greeting him with my best polite face, my best "nice" face. He made a simple mistake in the wake of my positive, trustworthy attitude. He slipped her _name_.

He didn't even realize he had done it. He was on the phone with her at the time and his head was in a million different places of course. I didn't give him any hint that I had picked up on it. I simply gave him a pat on the back and helped him sift through his mail like the good little publicist I needed him to believe I was.

I really should have been an actor. Sometimes I thought I was even better than Edward himself. I could have been wonderful if I had had the looks. But that didn't matter now because I had his trust and his money in my pocket along with my beloved dice in my hand.

Trust was a simple thing to gain from good people. Like I said, they are the easiest people in the world to lie to. _Easy_ when I fabricated my reference sheet and resume to get the job with the Cullens' all those years ago in order to get out of working with has -beens and child stars. _Easy_ when I made up a silly excuse to get Chicago to move Edward's audition. _Easy_ when I told my wife I wasn't going to gamble anymore.

And when I wasn't dealing with good people, and my lies didn't work....money always did. Like when I paid a friend to go and find Bella Swan. He was a private investigator who had been out of a job for a while. He was easy to bribe. It was so simple really. You find a person's weakness and then you can walk all over them.

And thats exactly what I planned to do to Bella Swan. Even though Edward had returned, I couldn't afford to have him pull another stunt like that. Not to mention he was exhausting himself by trying to keep up with this girl. He came in to work late several times. Edward wasn't usually one to oversleep. I knew it was because he had been on the phone with her yet again. The pale purple circles under his eyes gave him away. Not a good look for America's pretty boy.

I stumbled away from the club that night and found my way to a taxi. I had lost at least two hundred dollars, but the alcohol in my system was keeping me from grieving over it. Sitting in the back seat I took out the envelope the investigator sent me. Inside was a picture of Bella. She was quite pretty...in every ordinary way at least. He had jotted some notes down about a Recreation Center and a diner. The man was good at his job, observing her and starting to put her character together. Bella Swan was a humble, hardworking girl. I grinned wickedly.

_Good people. Ha ha...so easy._ I had a plane to catch.

______________________________________________________________________

As I looked into Bella Swan's big, brown, innocent doe eyes, I silently cheered to myself. This would be even easier than I thought. That confidence grew immediately as she warmly shook my hand and invited me in.

"Please come in, Mr. Krutch." she said. "It's so nice to finally meet you, Edward has told me so much about you."

"Thank you very much." I said, my voice thick with goodness and light and rainbows and ponies. "I hope whatever he told you was good." I chuckled like an idiot.

I watched as she frantically tidied up, shifting blankets on her tiny couch and washing paint off of her hands. "Oh I've heard nothing but good things about you." she said from the kitchen. "Edward and I both owe you so much."

I was busy taking in her apartment. I had never seen anything so pitiful.

"I just put on a pot of coffee, would you like some?" she asked. Her eyes were excited. She was happy to see me?

"Sure, that would be wonderful."

She brought out two mugs of coffee and we took a seat on her ratty old couch. I was about to speak when she started to ramble, "How is Edward doing? Is he okay? I can't thank you enough for being so wonderful to him when he got back to L.A. I feel like I owe you an apology for keeping him. I'm truly sorry if I ruined anything for you or for Edward."

Her eyes were sincere. I could see her fear behind them. But the fear wasn't of me. She was afraid for Edward. I couldn't believe how beautifully this was playing out in my hands. _There it was. Her weakness_. Just as I suspected.

"Well," I started slowly. "It was understandable, Bella. It's water under the bridge."

I gave her a warm, reassuring smile and she immediately relaxed a little.

"But I have come here with some concerns about Edward." I watched her reaction as she stiffened and the fear returned to her eyes. Just like I wanted.

"Is he okay?"

"He's alright, yes." I replied. "But I am concerned about him."

"Why, what's wrong?" she asked, searching my eyes. I could see her selflessness in that very moment. It was exactly what I needed to use to my advantage.

"Well, he hasn't been himself lately, and I'm wondering if you could help me figure out why." I said lightly. "He shows up late for work, he's constantly exhausted...." I decided to exaggerate a little. "He hasn't been eating like he used to. His mind is always somewhere else. It's affecting his career." And my wallet.

Bella's brow furrowed in worry and another emotion I couldn't place. Was it _guilt_?

"He wasn't always like this Bella." I said softly, my voice and my face reassuring her that I was on her side. That I was the good guy. But that I needed answers. "I'm trying to understand what the source of all of this is. I hate myself for saying it, but the only thing that has changed in his life recently....is you."

The girl's eyes fell to her coffee mug. I could see tears brimming on her eye lids.

"I knew this would happen..." she said in almost a whisper. There it was, the reaction I was looking for. All of her self doubt would end this relationship for me. All I had to do was provoke it. "It's my fault Larry, it really is. He's been working so hard to keep me out of the public eye. Between his job and trying to stay in touch with me, it is all probably running him ragged...I can't believe I -" She started to cry.

I put my hero face on again. I still needed her to believe in my "goodness" I still needed her to trust me.

"I want the both of you to be happy, Bella. I really do. I've been trying my best to preserve this relationship for the both of you, but it is getting harder and harder. And it's taking its toll on Edward even though I know he tries to hide it from you."

She looked up at me, the hurt etched across her features, broken by tears. "It's worse than he tells me?"

"Yes it is. His family is concerned for him as well." I lied. "Thats why I am here. They asked me to come and see you. They also asked that my visit here be kept from Edward as not to hurt him." I knew I had won as I watched the guilt thicken and cloud her eyes completely.

"His family?" she gasped. The tears continued. I could see her thoughts written all over her face. She was easy to defeat when it came to Edward. I knew that I could use her love for him to manipulate her as easily as I pleased. It was pathetic really.

**BPOV**

_His family_? I cringed as I imagined them and what they must think of me. I was ruining their son's life. I was ruining his career, just as I had been afraid of. And Edward was hiding it from me.

I was felt sick to my stomach. Edward and I were so similar in that we were hiding things from each other that would make us both worry or hurt. I couldn't tell him about the Rec or about the diner, and he couldn't tell me that our relationship was straining him so. His _family_ felt the need to intervene. _What had I done_?

I was a horrible person.

I looked up at Larry. He had been very kind. As much as it hurt to hear what he said, I knew it wasn't his intention to cause pain. He was concerned for Edward, he was doing his job. I could hate him for telling me this, but in my heart I knew it was all true.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I know how hard this is to hear." Larry said. "But I think it is in both of your best interests to end this. It is obviously hurting both of you. I may be Edward's publicist, but I am concerned for you as well. I don't want you to get hurt or caught up in the media."

His eyes seemed genuine enough. I was still reeling at the fact he was here. That Edward had hidden so much of his struggle from me that his publicist felt the need to fly here and beg me to help him.

"This time in Edward's life is crucial to his success. Not just in Hollywood but as a person. He's young and he's still learning the business. There are so many opportunities waiting for him. I'm afraid he is going to miss them."

"Me too." I replied. It had been my fear from the beginning that I would cause this. I couldn't let Edward do this to himself. Not for me.

"Bella, I can't make either of you end this. It is still your choice. I'm just telling you what I believe is best. If you would like to continue seeing him, I cannot stop you. I just needed you to understand what's happening." Larry said.

He still held an extremely kind attitude towards me. I guess you can't kill the messenger.

"I understand." I answered. "But you're right. I can't do this anymore."

He nodded in silent agreement.

"I think a clean break would be for the best." he said sadly. "It will be easier for both of you."

I knew he was right. I had to do this quick like a band aid. I already knew my heart would never be the same. It would never heal back just right after saying good bye to him. But I knew the old adage very well....if you love them, let them go.

I felt so stupid. I had felt this all along. As much as Edward had tried to put me at ease, I knew this day would come. I just wasn't prepared for it. At all. Nothing could make this feel okay.

Larry was extremely kind to me as he left the apartment. He thanked me for my 'selflessness,' gave me his number and told me that if I needed anything I should give him a call. I let myself fall apart as he closed the door behind him.

My tears flowed freely and sobs shook my body as I slid to the floor. I felt the weight of hopelessness settle upon me. I felt like I was losing absolutely everything and I could do nothing but bear it.

A good ten minutes had passed when I started to pull myself together. I had to make the phone call. I had to end this.

I blew my nose and splashed my face with cold water in the bathroom, trying to stop the water works. I couldn't sound like a mess over the phone. I had to be strong. I was so tired of it. But I had to do this. For Edward.

I packed my overnight bag, and gave Charlie a call, knowing that I didn't want to be here alone tonight. He was surprised by my call, but more than happy to have me visit. I hadn't been home in a while. He promised to pick me up in a few hours.

When I had all my things together I sat down on the couch and breathed deeply. The cell phone burned in my hand. My head was screaming at me. _ Do it now. Clean break. Its the right thing to do, Bella. It's going to fucking hurt, but it's what's right._

My heart was a mess. No direction or guidance came from it. All I felt was pain.

I picked up the phone and dialed his number. My heart was racing. I felt like I was going to be sick. He picked up on the second ring. I froze at the sound of his voice.

"Bella?" his velvet voice purred sleepily in my ears. I had woken him up. Immediately I felt my throat swell and my eyes start to water.

"H-hey," I managed to spit out. "I'm sorry, did I wake you?"

"No, I'm up." he lied. I heard him laugh softly and shift in his bed. It felt so good to hear his voice. My heart shattered as I realized I wouldn't hear it anymore. It didn't belong to me anymore.

"Edward, I need to talk to you." I finally stammered.

"Are you alright, Bella? Did something happen?" His voice became more alert and laced with worry. I heard the sheets shift again like he was sitting up.

How the hell do you tell someone you can't be with them anymore? How do you shut this feeling off? How do you love someone and then tell them you can't make it work? Do you lie? Do you pretend? There was no way to do this without the hurt. Without the inevitable pain.

_Clean break_. I heard Larry's voice in my head. I knew it was best. I hated myself for what I was about to say. I hoped that Edward would hate me too. It would be easier if he hated me.

"Edward, I can't see you anymore."

"What? Bella we can -"

"No, we can't work it out." I said it firmly. "I can't take it anymore."

"Bella," I heard the panic in his voice and I wanted to die. My head started to spin. "I know the distance is hard, believe me, I feel it just as much as you do. But I -"

I sucked in a breath and felt my heart burst into a million tiny pieces as I let myself say it. It was the only way he would let go.

"I don't love you anymore, Edward." I strangled a sob in my throat, praying he wouldn't hear it. I knew he wouldn't give up on this until I said those words. He had to hear it from me.

"Wh-what?"

I sucked in a broken breath, the tears streaming now. I had to say the vile words a second time. Lies. _ Lies_.

"I don't love you."

"But, Bella...." he asked in a breathy whisper. I could hear the pain in his voice. "Why?"

"We can't keep pretending this is going to work. It's too much Edward. Too much." I wanted to throw up as I spit out another lie. A hurtful, despicable lie. "How can I love someone who is never here?"

I wanted to die. I wanted to die. I wanted to _die_.

I heard his breathing change over the phone. I had hurt him. I had hit below the belt. He was quiet for a moment and I could not bear his silence. _Just hate me Edward. It's easier this way. Just hate me._

"Edward, I wish you the best of luck." I hated myself. "I really do. I hope you find what you're looking for in someone else. Someone you don't have to hide."

"Bella, please wait...I can't -"

"I have to go." I choked out. "Goodbye, Edward." I had to stop myself from saying 'I love you.'

Before I could hear him protest, I hung up the phone and threw it away from me, watching it skitter across the couch cushions. I ran to the bathroom and proceeded to empty my stomach into the toilet. This was hell. This was_ living hell_.

Feeling disgusting after lying to the only man I had ever truly loved, _and_ after getting sick...I took off my clothes and hopped into the shower, not even waiting for it to warm up. I couldn't feel it anyway. I couldn't feel anything. I ran the shower so long it turned my fingers to prunes. I let myself become completely numb. I kept telling myself that this was right. That I had done the right thing. That Edward could live his life now. That I was no good for him anyway.

I knew in my head that it was for the best. He had made so many sacrifices for me, it was time I made one for him. It was destroying me. But I imagined him happy, successful, living life to his full potential and the sharp pain dulled to an unavoidable aching in my chest.

I walked out of the bathroom and stepped into some clean clothes. I went to the mirror and applied a light layer of make up, even though it did little to hide my puffy, red rimmed eyes. I left my phone at the apartment, knowing that if Edward called me, I was powerless, I would pick up in a heart beat. And I couldn't let myself do that.

Locking the door behind me, I let Charlie take me home.

He knew not to ask me any questions yet. He let me sit in a comfortable silence, simply holding my hand. He knew that whatever had happened, I would tell him in due time. But for right now I just needed his quiet, loving presence.

When we got the house, Sue gave me a bear hug, following Charlie's lead and letting me be. She brought me upstairs to my old room where she had made up my bed and plugged in some old christmas lights. The room had some storage boxes in it and Charlie's treadmill, but Sue had made a nice quiet space for me. Without more than a few words, they left me to settle in. I kicked my shoes off and buried myself under the covers of my old bed. It felt like home, it smelled like childhood, it made me feel safe.

I laid there for what seemed like hours. The light in the room dimmed and became dark as night settled outside. I almost didn't hear it when Sue entered the room and sat on the edge of my bed.

She reached up and stroked my hair. She really was every bit of the mother I never had. I loved Renee with all my heart, but _I_ took care of _her_. As Sue kissed my forehead and lovingly tucked me in, I was overwhelmed. I felt like a child again and I reached up and wrapped my arms around her, sobbing into her fleece sweater as she rocked me back and forth.

It all came spilling out. Every last detail. I told her about Edward, about Christmas, about Larry, about the phone call. She listened intently, letting me speak. It was if she knew exactly what I needed. I swear she was an angel. She let me ramble, gently rubbing my back as she rocked me and telling me it was going to be okay.

When I was done, Sue helped me to the bathroom as I got sick again, holding my hair back the entire time. I hadn't realized how much I needed someone to take care of me. She went to the kitchen and brought up some water and aspirin, along with a warm washcloth to put on my head.

"Bella, how long have been this sick?" she asked, concerned.

"I'm not sick, I just get worked up. It's been happening for the past month or so now. the stress just gets to me I think." I was hicupping, the sobs starting to pass and my breathing coming back to normal. She felt my forehead. I had no fever, I was perfectly fine. But the look of concern didn't leave her face.

She reached up and started to stroke my hair again. "Do you get sick every time?"

"Not always. I usually just get dizzy and tired."

"Hmmm."

Her silence bothered me now. "Do you think something is wrong with me?" I asked nervously.

"No, Bella honey. That's not it..." I could see the wheels turning in her head and the worry etched in her expression growing more and more apparent. She wasn't telling me something.

"What is it, Sue?"

She sighed heavily, sorrowfully before turning to look me in the eyes. She spoke carefully, not wanting to send me even farther over the edge.

"I don't think you're sick, Bella....I think you might be pregnant."

**Sorry for the cliffie. Please review! I'm on a roll now so the next chapters should be posted fairly quickly. I know this chapter was sad, but it is always darkest before the dawn right? So keep reading :)**


	17. Chapter 17

**EPOV**

I rolled over in my comfortable sheets when I heard the sound of my phone buzzing on my night stand._ Bella_.

Instantly, I wiped the sleep from my eyes and grabbed the phone, answering on the second ring.

"Bella?"

"_H-hey" _she stammered. _ "I'm sorry, did I wake you?"_

I smiled at the sound of her voice, rolling over on my side and lying. "No, I'm up."

"_Edward, I need to talk to you."_ Her voice was strained. Something wasn't right. I couldn't hear very well over the phone but it sounded like she was crying. I sat up straight in bed.

"Are you alright, Bella? Did something happen?"

I listened intently. Bella was quiet for a moment, I could hear her trying to get her breathing under control. She was upset. I could hear it, I could_ feel_ it, and she was hiding it.

"_Edward, I can't see you anymore."_ she finally said. My heart froze with panic.

"What? Bella we can -"

"_No, we can't work it out."_ she finished for me. _"I can't take it anymore."_

I was _full out_ panicking now. I had hoped that it would never come to this. I was so sure that we could do this. I knew it was hard for both of us, I just never expected Bella to give up. I was desperate to change her mind. Desperate to hold onto her.

"Bella, I know the distance is hard, believe me, I feel it just as much as you do. But I-"

"_I don't love you anymore, Edward."_

I couldn't _breathe_. I couldn't _think_. I couldn't _move_. It couldn't be true...could it?"

"Wh-what?" I stuttered. I heard her choke back a sob and find her voice again.

"_I don't love you."_

My chest hurt as the words hit me a second time, affirming the reality that was crashing down on me. _She didn't love me_. I was so stricken with shock I could barely speak.

"But, Bella..." I managed to say. "Why?"

How could this be it? How could this _possibly_ be the end? How does one go from napping on a Friday afternoon to losing the love of their life in an _instant_?

"_We can't keep pretending this is going to work. It's too much Edward. Too much."_ Her voice shook with hopelessness and tears. _"How can I love someone who is never here?"_

Her words hit me like a train. They literally knocked the breath from my lungs. I was unable to utter a word as my panic became sharp, unyielding pain. I could hear her struggling to keep it together over the phone.

"_Edward, I wish you the best of luck."_ I could hear that she was sincere and I was enveloped in a sorrow that had paralyzed me. _"I really do. I hope you find what you're looking for in someone else. Someone you don't have to hide."_

The panic returned as I recognized her words meant a goodbye was fast approaching.

_No, no no ...NO!_

"Bella, please wait...I can't-"

"I have to go" she sputtered, inhaling sharply to hold back tears. "Goodbye, Edward."

And that was it. Her voice was cut off by her abrupt hang up. I sat on my bed, unmoving, absolutely bewildered by what had just occurred. This couldn't be real. this couldn't be happening. I lifted my arms, interlocking my hands on top of my head, trying to expand my lungs enough to breath. I couldn't get enough air.

For the life of me, I couldn't figure out what the hell to do. My gut told me to get my ass on a plane and fly down there, hear these words in person, try damn hard to change her mind.

I was a _failure_. I had done everything in my power to protect her and instead I had driven her away. I had destroyed the one thing I truly wanted. Even as she broke me with her words, I still couldn't stand to hear her cry. Even as she pushed me away, I wanted to comfort her, to hold her.

Everything about that phone call was wrong. Her tears, her strained voice, those words. That wasn't the Bella I knew. Something must have happened to change her mind. Or maybe she was just fed up with my absence. I was so utterly in shock, my brain could hardly function.

Finally finding my ability to move, I grabbed my cell phone and called her. No answer. I tried again. Still nothing. I called her at least five times before falling back on the bed in a huff. The rug had been pulled out from beneath my feet and I was spiraling out of control. I couldn't feel or think. _I was lost without her. _ Lost without her loving me.

"_I don't love you anymore, Edward."_

I winced as I replayed her words in my head over and over again. I felt powerless. I couldn't even move. I watched with unblinking eyes as the afternoon light from my window moved across the floor and eventually turned to darkness.

I tried calling again and again. Nothing. This _was_ real.

Morning came. Sleep never did.

______________________________________________________________________

Weeks passed and shooting for the film continued. I worked through them listlessly, living a half life. I never let go of my phone, praying and hoping beyond all hope that she would call me back. I had left voicemail after voicemail, begging her to call. I wanted more than anything to get on a plane and scoop her up in my arms again. But as I imagined it, I heard those words....

"_I don't love you anymore, Edward."_

This was what she wanted. I had to respect that, but I couldn't understand. I was so torn and Larry was keeping me so busy I could hardly think.

How was living like this the right thing? Even if it meant she was safe. Even if it was what she wanted. Why did I feel like this was still all wrong? There were missing pieces that I couldn't place. So I kept calling.

The filming in Chicago was going well. It was my first action romance movie. I worked hard to keep in physical shape. I memorized my lines faster than my co stars. The crew was pleased with me. I was doing well. Life had been so full, but so perfect at the same time, knowing that Bella was there. Even if she was miles from my arms, she was loving me, supporting me. I had felt like I could do anything.

And now I felt nothing.

"Edward!" someone called my name on the set. I turned to see Tanya Denali walking towards me, her long legs moving gracefully as she approached.

I had grown accustomed to seeing her around the past month. She was working on the set as well, on set design and production. Our relationship ended ages ago, but she was still a good friend of the family's and a good friend of mine.

"Hey Tanya" I answered, rising to my feet to say hello.

"Hey!" she smiled widely, flashing me a bleached white smile. "Some of the crew are going out to grab some lunch, you want to come with?"

I grabbed my coat. This was a routine of ours. Since the movie had started we would all go out and grab lunch together. Everyone became pretty close on the set. Not to mention, Tanya and I found ourselves catching up quite a bit.

It was clear to both of us that there was nothing between us romantically. But I had forgotten how good of a friend she could be when she tried. Alice had always adored her. We walked to her car and drove up to the usual corner bistro.

"You alright, Eddie?" she asked after we ordered.

"Yeah, fine." I assured her, taking a long swig of my drink.

"I don't believe you." She had known me for too long. I avoided her eyes and didn't respond. "Break up?" she asked.

That was a little _too_ accurate.

"How did you...?"

"Larry." she answered. "He was worried about you. Wanted me to check up on you."

My eyes widened, alarmed that Larry had told _anyone_ about Bella.

"Don't worry." she offered in reaction to my expression. "Your secret is safe with me."

She swirled her straw around the ice cubes in her glass. I watched her expression. She wanted to say something but she was holding back. On the one hand I appreciated it, on the other, I was curious to know what she was thinking. I was also very curious as to what Larry had told her. Instead of interrogating me she simply asked, "You ok?"

I nodded half heartedly at her. It was a strange moment. When I looked at Tanya I could see I was missing something, but she was careful not to bring up the subject again.

That evening I came back to my apartment and called Bella again. There was still no answer. My heart sank. I needed to _do_ something. I needed to go and find her. Even if it was only for her to tell me she didn't love me again. Even if she really didn't want me, I had to try. I had to hear her say the words.

But was that what she wanted? Was that the best thing to do?

I got up and grabbed my phone, planning to call Alice and Jasper's house. Maybe Alice would know what to do.

Before I could even dial their number, the door bell rang. I opened it to see Larry Krutch standing there with a wide grin on my door step. Tanya was beside him, both were dressed to the nines.

"Where are you guys going?" I asked as I noticed their apparel.

"We're taking you out!" Tanya said gleefully.

"We thought you could use some cheering up, Edward." Larry explained. I noticed his wife, Karen, standing behind him. She smiled meekly at me.

"Sorry, guys..." I said. "I just don't think I'm up for that yet. It's been a long day and I...."

"Live in the _now_, Ed." Larry said, patting my shoulder firmly. "No time like the present to pick yourself up and dust yourself off."

Though I should have felt thankful for all he had done for me, all I wanted to do was strangle him. I could see I wasn't going to get anywhere by protesting. When Larry wanted something, he got it.

He all but shoved me in the shower as Tanya went through my closet and found suitable clothes. I could hear his high pitched laugh over the running water. I needed a drink.

**Larry POV**

Edward was taking the break up much worse than I had expected. The energy, the life in his eyes had been depleted. He had been nothing but a zombie for the past couple days. I couldn't have that. Especially not while he was working. It made me look bad.

I was determined to take him out tonight. Tanya would accompany us as his date of course. How could he resist her with her skimpy black dress and kitten heels? I would have him back on his feet and better than ever in no time.

While the shower was running, the ladies waited outside and I put Edward's clothes on the bed. My eyes caught something small and shiny on his night stand. His cell phone. It was starting to vibrate wildly on his nightstand. I found my way over to the side of his bed and picked it up, examining the caller ID.

It was _Bella._ I cursed under my breath. It seems this would take me longer than I expected. I quickly deleted the voice message from his inbox and her number from under his missed calls. I sensed someone in the room and looked up to see Tanya. I pointed to the phone and said,

"You keep an eye on his phone tonight. Don't let him make any calls. Be subtle."

She nodded but looked uneasy. The water stopped running behind me, I didn't have time to try and figure out Denali's problem. I placed the cell back on the night stand and left the room while Edward dressed.

We decided on a smaller club on the north end of the strip. I could tell Edward's head was in an entirely different place altogether. Bella had been more to him than I initially expected. I nodded at Tanya, gesturing towards the bottle of champagne that sat across from her in the limo.

"Anybody up for a drink?" she asked, taking my cue and popping the top. Edward was the first in line. I smiled as he downed the glass. This night would prove to be very interesting.

**EPOV**

The music in the club was pounding in my ears. I had had a couple drinks and was feeling a slight buzz from the night life. Tanya sat beside me, rattling on about some club she had been to with Alice. I simply nodded my head when she spoke, not even attempting to listen to what she had to say. I checked my phone. Still no calls. I started to dial Bella's number.

"Dance with me!" Tanya yelled suddenly over the music. Grabbing my hand she dragged me to the dance floor, grinding her hips against me. I let my phone slip back into my pocket and tried to just let myself relax, sinking into the rhythm of the bass shaking the floor beneath my feet.

Tanya was a gorgeous woman. Any man in my place at this very moment would be drooling as she pressed her body up against me, moving her hips against mine. But even though I was getting increasingly drunk, I could still feel how wrong this was. Her curves were not Bella's curves. She didn't fit me the way Bella had. Her movements were all harsh and grinding, while Bella...well she was just..._beautiful_ in whatever she did. Whether she was sleeping next to me, or hiking up to the meadow with me, sitting on the boat beside me down by La Push....

I marched to the bar and did another round of shots.

I spotted Larry and Karen making their exit, waving goodnight as they left. I could tell Karen didn't enjoy the club scene as much as Larry did. I had to agree with her. As I watched them leave, I wished I could follow. However, Tanya had other plans. She was _all over_ the place. If we weren't dancing, we were drinking.

Around two am we stumbled out of the club and into a taxi. Tanya's incessant giggling filled my ears as the city lights started to whizz by the car window. I hadn't been this drunk in a very long time but I was slowly coming down to earth. I suddenly felt a hand on my thigh. And all at once, Tanya was kissing my neck roughly, moaning into my skin. I began to protest when I noticed something fall out of her handbag.

It was my cell phone. I grasped her shoulders and pulled away from her wandering mouth.

"Tanya," I asked, searching her eyes. "What are you doing with my phone?"

I may have been drunk, but I clearly remembered putting it in my pocket. She had to have swiped it from me somehow. I looked into her eyes, seeing that uneasiness once again. She had things to tell me, but she was holding back.

"Tanya..."

"Larry...he...well I -"

"You have to tell me." I said, looking her in the eyes. "I don't know what you're keeping from me, but you have to tell me."

Tanya shifted away from me, unwrapping her legs from mine and fixing her dress. She handed me my phone and stared out the window.

"She called, Edward."

"What!?" I glanced down at my phone, there was no sign of a missed call or voicemail.

"Larry deleted it while you were in the shower." Tanya was looking away from me, her face hard and her eyes distant.

"Tanya...what is going on?"

She turned to face me slowly. Her expression broke as she started to cry.

"I'm so sorry Edward, I never should have...."

"Never should have what?" She continued to sputter. "Tell me what's going on!"

She took a deep breath and started. "Larry gave me a call back in December. It was Christmas day actually."

My mind went immediately to Bella and her perfect skin, exciting my every cell. That was almost three months ago now.

"He had booked me a job working on your movie here in Chicago. Said he needed to speak with me." Her hands fidgeted with the hem of her dress. "When I met with him he told me about your Bella. Told me your career was in trouble and he needed another pair of eyes on you."

I looked at her, confused. "At first, I thought it was nothing. And it gave me a chance to be close to you again. Larry would pay me to make sure you came out to lunch with all of us, or to give him updates on how you were on the set. I think he secretly hoped we would get back together, but when I let him know it wasn't happening, he took it to the next level."

My stomach was in knots. What had Larry _done_?

"You know a couple weeks ago, when he went to Seattle for a business meeting?"

I nodded, remembering his shiny new attitude when he had returned from that trip.

"He didn't go to Seattle, Edward. He went to _Forks_."

My eyes widened in horror as I realized what that meant.

"He found Bella. He had hired a private investigator to find her and when he did, Larry went down there himself. He _manipulated_ her into breaking up with you."

Even as anger raged through my veins, my heart was alive with hope. I_ knew _it was all wrong. I _knew_ there was missing pieces. I _knew_ she still loved me. My head was spinning.

"Why would he do this?"

"Larry's been a gambler for years now, Edward. Where do you think spends all your money?" Tanya explained. "He lost big recently. I mean _big_. He saw Bella as a means to an end. The less you worked, the less he made, the less he could gamble. It's sick."

I looked at Tanya. She was disgusted with Larry, as was I. But I could see shame on her face. And guilt.

"And you..."

"I was the hired distraction." she explained. "I jumped at the chance to win you back, Edward. But it wasn't working. I didn't realize how much you loved her. I'm so sorry, Eddie. I'm _so_ sorry." she started to cry again. I instantly felt sympathy for her.

"But you told me the _truth_." I said. "That's what matters."

She wiped her eyes and looked up at me. "I don't want to be the one to destroy what you have with Bella. I can't do it."

I owed Tanya so much. It a moment of pure gratitude, I wrapped my arms around her in a bear hug, thanking her. When the taxi reached my building, I kissed her cheek goodbye and flew upstairs. Slamming the door shut behind me, I dialed Bella's number, anger flaring as I thought of Larry erasing her voicemail.

It rang several times, I almost thought she wouldn't answer...it _was_ kind of late. Just as I was about to give up, I heard someone pick up the phone.

"Bella? Bella it's me..." I started.

I could hear a lot of noise in the background...many voices, static...and sirens. _Sirens_? The speakers scratched loudly as someone finally answered.

"Hello?"

It was a man. His voice was rough and low. His greeting was frantic.

"Who is this?" he asked quickly. I could hear his rapid breathing on he other end of the line.

"This is, uh...Edward." I answered, completely perplexed by this stranger answering Bella's phone. I heard the man sigh loudly, still taking short, quick breaths, as if he had just run a marathon. The sound of the sirens still sang through the phone.

"Edward, this is Charlie Swan." he panted. My body immediately went rigid. "Son, I don't know where you are right now, but you need to get your ass down to Forks as soon as you can."

**Next chapter is on its way :) But I need some sleep, its about 2am here. I'll update before midnight tonight. Promise!**


	18. Chapter 18

**BPOV**

Well, the pee stick said it all. All three of them. I was without a doubt, pregnant with Edward Cullen's baby.

Sue has insisted I stay for the weekend, driving me to work when I needed to be at the diner and coming home on a sunday morning with the pregnancy tests. By now, Charlie knew everything. He and Sue didn't keep secrets from each other. In any other circumstance I would want to keep this from them. I would want to keep them from worrying. But with everything that had happened in the last month, I _needed_ them.

Charlie was angry. At first I thought he was angry with me, which I could understand. But then I realized he was angry with _Edward_. I begged him not to be angry with Edward, told him it was my fault and my choice. Edward had no idea.

When all three tests had given me that little plus sign, I sat on my bed in my old room, unable to move. I went through the entire range of emotions. Looking at the wall paper from my child hood, I was terrified of raising a child..._.alone_. I was almost 23 years old and I could barely make ends meet for _myself_.

My heart was broken as I thought of Edward. The lies I had uttered on the phone still haunting me. _I did love him_. I loved him with every_ fiber of my being_. There would never be another love like his. Never. _ He was it_.

The hollow ache burned in my chest as I came to that realization. I would be alone for the rest of my life. I could _never_ love someone the way I loved Edward.

But I could love his child just as much. As I thought of the being inside of me I felt the corners of my mouth move upwards in a small smile. Whoever he or she was...they were a piece of him. I would forever carry a piece of Edward with me. At least I had that.

I wept as I imagined the years with him that would never be. I wept for the child within me who would never know his sweet embrace or his crooked grin. He would have been a wonderful father. I thought of Edward now, wondering what he must be doing. Wondering if things were fixing themselves, if he was okay. He couldn't know. If a relationship with me had threatened his well being so much, imagine what a child would do to his career, to his life...to our lives. Larry was right, the clean break had probably been the best way.

But _God_, did it _hurt_.

I cried for hours, out of frustration and hurt, out of love, out of heartbreak. Out of hormones. I went to the mirror to examine myself. I wasn't fat yet. But there was a thickness to my middle that I hadn't noticed before. I marveled at the amazing thing that is the female body. Able to withstand, to endure, create.

Feeling empowered by my god given abilities I said to myself then as I wiped my tears that I would do the same thing. _Withstand, endure, create_. I was no stranger to struggle. I knew I could do this. I just needed to figure things out and get my feet planted in the ground.

But I still could not shake this feeling of being utterly alone.

____________________________________________________________________

The next few weeks ran their course. Sue lent me her truck so I could travel back and forth from Moss Apartments back to Dad's house. They wanted to keep me close, make sure I wasn't alone, make sure I was eating right. I knew as I looked at my bills that I would have to move in with them soon. But I couldn't bear to think of what would happen if I left Mrs. Faye.

She was getting more and more lost in the past. It hurt me to see her worry over those green glass earrings we could never find. Annie didn't even bother looking. She sat on the couch and ignored me when I entered the room. Her gum cracked loudly as she flipped through magazines and smoked her cigarettes. She didn't even bother leaving anymore. Mrs. Faye's apartment was her own personal ash tray.

As the days went on, my energy levels went down. I was so tired all the time. I took naps during my breaks at work. I came back to my apartment only to sleep. Weekends I would spend with Charlie and Sue, who were a great comfort to me.

"Bella," Sue said one day. "I've set up a couple doctors appointments for you next week."

"Thank you," I said. "I appreciate it."

I obviously had no idea what I was doing. Apparently there were a whole bunch of things I should or shouldn't be doing. Being pregnant brought on a whole new list of rules.

"I think..." Sue started hesitantly. "I think you should tell Edward."

"It would ruin his life, Sue."

"Well if you ask me, I'd say _Larry_ has you believing that. And you let your self doubt rule you."

"Wh-what?"

"Bella," Sue said, taking my hands staring into my eyes. "You let yourself think you aren't worth it. But _you are_."

I looked down at the floral tablecloth. Even if I wasn't ordinary, even if I was worth his time, how could he forgive me now?

"Think about it." Sue said, walking back into the kitchen. "He deserves to know."

That night I went back to my apartment, Sue's words echoing in my head. She was right. He had a right to know. But I was so torn. How could he ever forgive me for saying those horrible lies on the phone?

I hadn't touched my cell much in the past couple of weeks. Edward had called over and over and I hadn't responded. Every time I had wanted to, Larry's words burned in my brain. _Clean break. For the best_.

I dropped my keys and came in the door. It was late evening. I thought about what he was doing, where he was....should I call? What do I say?

I went to the bathroom...the need to pee had increased significantly as of late. All the while I was mulling over the words in my head. How the hell do I do this? I got up and washed my hands, stopping to look at myself in the full length mirror.

Though I wasn't huge yet, I was certainly beginning to show. It wasn't hard seeing as I was so thin before, to notice a small bump appearing. I looked at the calender. We were well into March now. I was almost three months along.

I had to call. I knew I had to.

I picked up my cell phone and dialed his number, my heart in my throat. I was terrified that he would pick up, and even more terrified that he wouldn't.

The phone rang and rang. _ Nothing_. My heart skipped a beat at the sound of his voice on the answering machine.

"_Hey this is Edward, I'm not here right now so leave a message at the beep._"

Beep.

"H-hey Edward...It's Bella." I stammered. "Listen I know you haven't heard from me in a while now and I know this is probably stupid of me to call. But I really need to talk to you about something. It's really important, so just give me a call when you get this."

I quickly hung up the phone and flopped down on to the couch, exhaling loudly. Was this truly the right thing to do? What would he say? Would he be angry?

I thought back to that horrible phone call and remembered just wanting him to hate me, to make it easier. But now I was terrified that he actually might.

I pulled out my sleeper couch and set up my bed. Checking my phone constantly. Nothing.

I put on some flannel pajamas, kicked, smacked and bopped the heater to life, and then finally laid in bed. I anxiously stared at my phone as the hours passed. Pretty soon, I was out like a light.

But not for long.

I awoke to the sound of a loud smash, coming from Mrs. Faye's apartment. I sat up slowly and stretched. This happened sometimes. Mrs. Faye would have to get up to use the bathroom and just about wreck the place on her way there. She needed some help.

I slowly got out of bed and grabbed my spare key to her door. Putting on my slippers, I made my way down the hallway to her door, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. As I got closer I saw that the door was already open. My stomach twisted in knots. _What the hell.._.?

I jumped as I heard another crash and a slamming drawer, followed by Mrs. Faye's whimpers. Carefully I pushed the door farther open and entered the apartment. Mrs. Faye was still in bed, but she was leaning over, looking into the kitchen and crying. I ran to her side.

"Mrs. Faye what -"

Then I turned to the kitchen and I saw. It was Annie, stuffing her purse and slamming drawers.

"Annie! What are you -"

She spun around, eyes wide with shock as she saw me, dropping her purse to the floor in surprise. Everything hit the tile floor all at once. Mrs. Faye's pearls, her savings jar full of quarters and dollar bills. Something rolled to my feet and I bent down to pick it up.

_It was a green glass earring_. My jaw fell open.

I found its match on the floor and picked them both up. They were absolutely exquisite. I was shaking with anger as I closed my fist protectively around them and looked up at Annie - a deer caught in headlights.

Before I could open my mouth, I heard the toilet flush in the bathroom. I jumped as the door opened and Roy came waltzing out, stopping short at the sight of me. I froze when I saw the butt of a gun sticking out of his jeans.

"Annie, what the hell is she doin' here!?" He immediately reached for the gun, pulling it out so quickly I could hardly move. It was pointed directly at me.

"Don't be stupid, Roy!" Annie shouted. "Lets just get the rest of this stuff and get out of here!"

Roy didn't move. His eyes were dangerous. I stepped in front of Mrs. Faye.

"Annie, finish up. _Now_." he said menacingly.

Annie walked over to the nightstand in from of me and opened the drawer, finding more of Mrs. Faye's antique jewelry and stuffing it in her purse.

"Annie, how _could_ you?" I whispered angrily through my teeth. She stood up and turned to me, her face only inches away.

"I love Ray, Bella." she said softly, urgently. "But he ain't the same when he doesn't have his fix." She lifted her shirt sleeve to reveal a deep bruise on her wrist, turning her body so that Ray wouldn't see. "Lately he doesn't have the money to get one. So I'm going to take care of him."

She gestured to her purse full of loot. "Stay_ out _of it." she growled.

"Ray let's go. She grabbed his arm and headed for the door, stopping suddenly just before she walked out. She turned slowly and looked down at my closed fist.

"Give me the earrings." she commanded. I was boiling with rage. Mrs. Faye whimpered behind me.

"I think you've taken enough, Annie." I said firmly, anger shaking in my voice.

"Give. Me. The earrings." her voice was low and threatening. I didn't budge.

In one quick movement, she grabbed Roy's gun and flew over to me, pointing it in my face and screaming, "GIVE ME THE EARRINGS!"

She grabbed my fist, trying to pry open my fingers and I struggled against her, lost in a fight of limbs and fists. We threw each other forcefully around the apartment, scratching and shoving. I was trying desperately to hold on to those earrings. My mind didn't even register the gun until two shots rang out loudly, pounding my ear drums with sound.

All was still.

Everything following that moment seemed to turn in slow motion. I went from feeling nothing, to feeling immense pain in my right shoulder. I went from standing to falling to the cold floor.

I could see Annie's face twist in horror as she turned and ran to the door, tugging Ray along with her.

I could hear Mrs. Faye screaming and crying for help. I couldn't believe what was happening. The wind had been knocked from my chest. My hand instantly went to the source of the pain, immediately becoming covered in thick, warm blood.

Time meant nothing as I slipped in and out of consciousness. I could hear sirens and voices....so many voices. I could feel hands on me. I could hear my father.

_My father._

My eyes fluttered as I fought against the fog that was consuming my mind, struggling to see him. I was afraid of the darkness that was coming for me. And the blood..._so_ much blood.

"Dad..."

"I'm here honey, I'm here." I felt his hand stroking my hair. I opened my eyes enough to see his worried face hovering over me, along with a paramedic who was leaning over and ripping open the top of my shirt to get to the wounds. My arms curled instinctively around my swollen middle.

My world was spinning in and out of control. Edward's face appeared in my mind as my eyes rolled into the back of my head.

"Edward..."

This couldn't be it. This couldn't happen without him knowing the truth. I _loved _him. I missed him. I never meant to hurt him. I felt myself repeating his name over and over again. I needed him here.

Many pairs of hands lifted me up and onto soft sheets. Where am I going?

Everything I could hear or see was a muddled mess. I couldn't understand anyone, I was losing consciousness. Finally, I let myself close my eyes, unable to fight to stay awake anymore.

**Charlie POV**

I had been sound asleep next to Sue when I got the call.

Jumping out of bed I threw my clothes on and raced to the cruiser, frantically speeding across town. _My baby. My girl._

The paramedics had arrived before I did. I shoved my way past them, flashing my badge at anyone who tried to stop me.

A sob escaped my mouth as my eyes found her in a pool of blood on the floor, surrounded by paramedics. _My baby. My girl._

I shoved my way through the crowd of people and knelt beside her. Her eyes were fluttering wildly as she tried to stay away.

"Dad..."

"I'm here, honey. I'm here." I assured her, stroking her hair. Her shirt was soaked in blood and she had her arms wrapped protectively around her middle. _My grandbaby_. Even soaked in her own blood she was till worried about someone else. My heart broke as the paramedic ripped off her right sleeve and the top of her shirt, revealing two bullet wounds.

"The bullets made it through because of the close range..." he started to explain to me. I was trying hard to listen. The two gunshots were located close to each other. One just on the inside of her right shoulder and the other on her upper chest. "She's lost a lot of blood, we have to get her to the hospital quickly. I need a read on the baby's heart beat."

"Edward..." Bella was muttering over and over again.

I didn't know what to do with myself. The paramedic read me like a book.

"Chief Swan, she's going to need some clothes, an over night bag. Why don't you go gather up some things and meet us down at the ambulance. Hurry."

I ran to her apartment, found her bag and started throwing clothes inside. I wrapped up the electric blanket Sue had given her, grabbed her toothbrush and threw it in. I was about to head out the door when I heard her phone buzzing loudly on her night stand.

I picked it up in a panic.

"Bella? Bella it's me..." a young man's voice started.

"Hello? Who is this?" I had a pretty good idea who this might be.

"This is uh...Edward." came the voice. I sighed, loudly, still trying to catch my breath. I wasn't happy with anything concerning Bella's current situation, whether or not it was his fault. All I knew was that my daughter needed him. Now. _My baby, my girl_.

"Edward, this is Charlie Swan." I said hurriedly, making my way out the door and following the paramedics down the stairs, carrying my angel on a stretcher, a breathing mask strapped around her face. Her eyes were closed. "Son, I don't know where you are right now, but you need to get your ass down to Forks as soon as you can."

"Wh-what happened?"

"St. Anne's hospital, you understand?"

"Yes, Sir. I'm on my way." He said urgently.

I hung up the phone and hopped into the back of the ambulance. It was almost 3am. My mind was racing..._what the hell happened?_ The frantic movements of medics and officers weren't explaining anything.

This moment had been a thing of my nightmares ever since Bella moved downtown. It wasn't my district, which made me more uneasy. But Bella had been so sure. She flourished there, fulfilled by her work and her life. She was _happy_. It was all a father could want for his daughter. I had long feared this day, praying every night that it would never come. The world is a cruel place.

Bella stirred in her unconsciousness, her fists balled tightly. She was in _pain_. I rested my hand on hers, trying to relax her tense hands. They opened slowly to reveal a pair of green glass earrings.

**Thank you all so much for your reviews! You have been nothing but encouragement and inspiration. I'll be writing more tonight so stay tuned for an update sometime later. I hope this chapter will hold you over until then. Much love ~hippie.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Hey guys! I know I've been an awful person with these mean old cliff hangers. So how about a reunion? Sound good? **

**oh PS. I have to apologize about the last chapter. I noticed as I re read it that I somehow changed Roy's name to Ray about half way through. Good lord. I need to stop staying up so late to write these chapters! Sorry about that my loves. Hope this chapter makes up for it :)**

**EPOV**

"St. Anne's hospital, you understand?" Charlie's breath was picking up pace again. He was running.

_Hospital_? Oh God....._Bella_.

"Yes, Sir, I'm on my way." The line went dead.

My heart rate hit the roof. Panic over took me. Snapping into action I dialed Alice's number, swiftly grabbing my bag and stuffing clothes inside. I had to go. _ Now_.

_Pick up, Alice. Pick up_.

She didn't answer. I called again. There was no way I could drive. Chicago to Washington was almost 13 hours without stops by car. That was out of the question. I needed a plane. A _fast_ plane. I needed to be there _now_.

"Edward? What the hell -?" Alice finally answered, her voice thick with sleep and frustration.

"Alice, I-"

"This better be pretty _damn_ good, Edward. Its almost 3 am."

"Alice, I need your help." My voice was urgent, almost shaking.

"Wh-what's wrong?"

"I need to get to Forks. _ Now_. Bella's in trouble. Do you have someone in Chicago...?"

Alice had a never ending network of people spanning across the _globe_ to work with once her company had sprung up from the ground and gone international. At first I was annoyed at the multitude of people who associated themselves with the Cullen family when I _barely _knew them. But I had never been more grateful than now that her friends spread so vastly across the country.

I continued slamming clothes into a duffel bag and leafed through my wallet. My thoughts were only of Bella as I heard Alice wake Jasper and get out of bed. _What could have happened_? Charlie didn't explain and the tone in his voice over the phone left me no room to ask. Whatever had occurred, it had_ just _happened. All I knew was that Bella _needed _me. I pictured her apartment building and the desolate side of town she lived in. Her surroundings had always made me nervous, but her spirit was never broken by the town she lived in. I thought back to that day in the elevator... remembering how fragile she had looked to me. And Charlie Swan was_ running_. Whatever this was...it was _bad_.

"Alice -"

"I'm making the call, Edward. Chase will be there in 20 minutes."

"Thank you Alice."

"Edward Cullen, you better call me when you get there. I want to know what's happening."

"I'll let you know when I find out."

Hanging up the phone, I grabbed my keys and my bag and bolted out of my apartment. I ran to the lobby, waiting anxiously for Chase to arrive. 20 minutes seems to pass at an hour's pace. Finally I saw him pull up to the curb.

Chase was a long time friend of Alice. He was a few years older than me with shaggy brown hair and round pudgy cheeks, a small patch of hair on his chin. He adored Alice. She had a way of befriending anyone she met. Chase had become part of her network in Chicago as her company began to boom.

The son of a wealthy business man, Chase had bought his share of toys. From jet ski's to snowmobiles...he had the works. But when he was old enough to fly, his jet became his baby.

I raced out of the building and wrenched open the passenger side door, slamming it shut behind me.

"Well hello there, Edward!" said Chase with annoying cheerfulness. "Long time no see!"

I had to compose myself before I spoke. He was doing me a great favor, I had to stop myself from snapping at him for his time consuming small talk.

"Good to see you too Chase. Thank you so much for coming. This was an unexpected emergency...."

"Well no problem, man. Anything for the Cullens." he said with a grin, pulling away from the curb and speeding up.

I thanked God that he finally sensed my urgency and raced us to the air strip. We wasted no time climbing up into the jet and strapping ourselves in. I was a mess of nerves. Even though Chase was doing his best to hurry, it would never be fast enough. As he prepared for take off I turned to him and asked,

"How long with this take do you think?"

"Well a commercial flight would take about an hour and forty five minutes. But in this baby, I'll have you there in an hour and fifteen." he smiled proudly.

And hour and fifteen minutes. It was worlds better than an hour and forty five, but it still felt like eternity to me as we flew.

I tried desperately to calm myself down as the minutes passed, a sea of city lights beneath us. It was no use. _St. Anne's Hospital. _ Hospitals were for people who are sick, or injured....or_ dying_. I winced and forced the thought from my mind. No. _ No_. She had been manipulated out of my life for too long already. I was just getting her back. She couldn't leave me now. Fate wouldn't be that cruel....would it?

My jaw was taught. I was fighting to stay in control. To stay focused. _I had to get to her_. I was thankful that Chase was too tired to be talkative. The early hour would be helpful when we landed as well. No one would be awake to bombard me at the air strip or get in my way when I drove to the hospital.

After what seemed like an eternal wait, Chase landed the plane in record time. Making it in an hour and _ten_ minutes. I felt like I had counted every one. I could barely utter a thanks as I got a cab from the airport parking lot and sent the driver speeding to St. Anne's, leaving Chase and his plane behind.

St. Anne's was the largest hospital in Forks. As we approached, I took in the multitude of windows gracing the face of the building, wondering which room was Bella's and how I would find her... how many flights of stairs...how many steps...time was a precious thing. But it didn't matter. I would race against time. I would walk through_ fire_ for her. I left the taxi driver a large tip, not wanting to take the time to get change. Slinging my bag over my shoulder, I sprinted into the lobby, breathless as I came to an abrupt halt at the front desk.

Everything was quiet around me. This wing of the hospital was fairly quiet as people slept in the waiting room or tip toed passed hospital room doors. Everything felt and smelled sterile and plastic. The space held the weight of hopelessness.

"Can I help you, young man?" The voice of an older woman grasped my attention. She was impossibly old to still be working. Her face was carved with laugh lines and her drooping eyes were kind as she looked at me.

"Yes," I choked out, still trying to catch my breath. "I need to find Bella Swan."

"Well alright dear, just you wait a moment. I'll find her room number for you."

I almost groaned out loud as the elderly woman leafed through a giant cabinet of file folders....as _slowly_ as she could. I was anxiously shuffling my feet, waiting to take off as soon as she gave me the room number. I looked like a relay runner, waiting for the baton.

"Edward?" I whirled around at the sound of my name to see a middle aged woman with dark hair and a kind face. She still had pajama pants on, a policeman's jacket slung over her shoulders to keep her warm. She approached me carefully, sticking out her hand to shake mine. I searched her eyes frantically, wondering if she knew Bella, or if she just recognized my face from a magazine.

"I'm Sue," she said. "I'm Bella's step mother."

I breathed a sigh of relief. The floodgates in my mind opened wide and questions came pouring out of my mouth.

"Where is she? Is she ok? Is she hurt? Is she hurt bad?" I was looking over her shoulder, anxious to move past her to where ever they were keeping Bella. I was pacing back and forth in front of her, going out of my mind.

She placed a hand on my arm, bring me to a sudden stop.

"Edward, why don't you come and sit with us. We're still waiting for word from the doctors. I'm sure Charlie can explain better than I can."

I followed her as she walked to the east side of the building, bring me to a corner to find the man I assumed was Charlie, sitting on the edge of his seat with his head in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other.

"Charlie," Sue said softly, resting a hand on his shoulder. I could see both of them were exhausted. "He's here."

Charlie rose from his seat to greet me. I dropped my bag to the floor and offered him my hand. He shook it firmly and looked me over with furrowed eye brows.

"Glad you're here, son." he said finally. "I know Bella will be glad too."

"What happened? Can I see her? I _need_ to _see her._" I begged, still feeling out of breath even as my heart beat was slowly regulating itself. I didn't have enough air in my lungs.

"We can't see her yet, we're waiting for more word." he took a deep breath and looked me in the eyes, starting hesitantly.

"Bella was shot this morning around 2:30 in Mrs. Faye's apartment."

I swear my heart stopped_. Shot_? The air escaped my mouth in one loud huff that felt like a choking sob. My hand went to my head as I started to pace again in front of them. Moving was the only thing keeping me from falling apart. I listened in utter despair as Charlie continued.

"There is evidence of a burglary and a small skirmish, but whoever it was, they had a head start out the door. She took two shots to her upper right chest and shoulder. Mrs. Faye was too distraught to tell us too much...her mind is going in and out. Bella is the only one who knows the story, but she hasn't been conscious long enough to tell us what happened."

"Wh-what did they....H-how....She-" I couldn't form _words_.

Charlie and Sue were looking at each other. The expression in their eyes making it clear that they were hiding something from me. Sue finally spoke up.

"Edward...has Bella gotten in contact with you at all recently?"

"She tried too earlier tonight...My phone was...Larry he..." _God_ there was so much to explain. Sue looked at Charlie, communicating with her eyes a message I didn't understand. She started to gently rub my back and guided me to a chair. I could see now why Bella spoke so highly of her. She reminded me of my own loving mother.

"It's okay Edward." she said softly, gesturing to Charlie to take a seat as well. "Just try to relax, alright? The doctor should be out soon to give us an update. All we know so far is that they have been trying to stabilize her and stop the bleeding as best they can."

Minutes seemed like hours. I was ready to rip my hair out waiting for the damned doctor. I could feel both Charlie and Sue's eyes on me as I sat before them....a fidgety, stressed out, _wreck_. Charlie was not much better than me. We were silent as our worries consumed us.

I called Alice and let her know I made it to the hospital, asking her to pass on the word to our parents. When I explained what I knew, she freaked out. It took everything I had to try and calm her down when I myself was far from serene.

I hung up the phone only after having to convince her not to fly to Forks. I took a deep breath, shifting in my chair again. Sue was dozing in her chair, curled up in Charlie's coat. He looked down lovingly at her, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear before his eyes came to rest on mine. He was silent for a moment, as if searching for the right thing to say.

"Bella loves you, you know." he said simply. He sniffed loudly and looked at his boots. "She didn't mean what she said."

I looked up at him with wide eyes.

"I know it's none of my business," he continued. "But I know she'd want me to tell you...in case she didn't get the chance."

My chest was filled with an aching that kept me from _breathing_. "It's been tearin' her apart, Edward. And I don't like seein' my girl this way."

"Larry he -" I started. I wished I could explain. I wished I could tell him what I felt for his daughter. She was it. She was the one. Loving her was the reason for my _existence_.

"I know." he said, raising a hand to stop me. "A lot has happened. And there are new problems for you to face now... I just hope you two can fix this." He looked down at Sue, his eyes soft. "Life is far too short to live without the one you love."

Before I could speak, a tall, thin man in a white coat entered the waiting room. The three of us were on our feet in an instant. I felt ill with unease. My eyes focused intently on the doctor, who recognized me immediately.

"Well," he said with a smile. "It isn't everyday we get a celebrity visit, Mr. Cullen. My daughter is a huge fan..."

I hated doctors like this. The arrogant sons-of-bitchs who thought that the world revolved around them. Everyone capitulating to his pace. He had everyone waiting for his answers, playing with us while he took his time. I stared angrily at him, my muscles tense. His smile immediately fell from his face and his eyes returned to the clip board in front of him.

"Why don't you folks follow me back to Bella's room. She's stable and comfortable now, though not conscious yet. Her pain medication should be doing its work."

He turned and led us down the hall to the farthest room. I was suddenly terrified. _What had happened to my Bella_? I held my breath with anxiety as we entered the small room.

As my eyes found her, I felt as though I had been punched in the gut. "_Bella._.." my voice shook.

There she was. I had never seen her so fragile....so _broken_. The paper gown did little to hide the enormous bandages across her shoulder and chest. She laid under pale blue hospital blankets, looking peaceful yet so tired. So worn. Her brown locks were splayed across the pillow. Her face was frighteningly pale, breathing tubes adorning her nose. Her arms were black and blue at the elbow where several IVs were placed.

_My Bella_.

I could hear the doctor start to speak again, addressing the three of us, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from her small form in the enormous bed. My eyes ran over her figure, up the IV tubes to the machines she was hooked up to.

I stopped suddenly when I saw it. The heart monitor was registering not one....but _two_ heartbeats.

My breath caught in my throat and my eyes fell on her middle. Sure enough, I could see her small, swollen stomach. It was a small bump, but it was there just the same. I could feel Sue and Charlie's eyes on me as I tuned in and heard the doctor speak.

"The good news is that Mom and baby are both okay."

_Mom and baby_..._my baby_. My eyes became blurry with water.

"The close range of the bullets is what did the most damage. But luckily, both made clean entries and exits without shattering and damaging surrounding organs. The blood loss was what was the most significant. We have her on some pain medication and are providing oxygen to prevent hypoxia."

Charlie tore his eyes away from his daughter and asked what was to happen next.

"Well, we're going to keep her here for a bit to keep monitoring the healing progression and keep an eye on the baby. Both of their heart rates are steady and strong right now." He gave Charlie a warm pat on the back. "I can assure you, with some time and recovery, Bella will be good as new."

I felt myself release a breath I had forgotten I was holding. I jumped to attention as Bella stirred. She let out a soft moan, feeling the pain all over her body I'm sure.

"Well, it looks like she's coming too. I'll give you guys some time with her and let the officers take her statements later when she's up to it." the doctor said. Charlie thanked him sincerely and shook his hand before he left.

My eyes hadn't left that small, swollen bump beneath the blue hospital sheets. I listened as the heart monitor beeped, watching the thin lines on the screen rise and fall. I was frozen in place, paralyzed with so many emotions. Worry, fear, happiness, shock...pure _love._ Her eyes were starting to flutter and her head lolled to the side as she fought to find consciousness.

"Bella?" Charlie whispered, leaning down by her side. I stood behind him, unmoving. Every cell in my body ached to pull Bella into my arms and take her pain away. But her father came first, turning his back to me and motioning to me to stay where I was. He needed to see his daughter. "Bella, honey can you hear me?"

I felt myself instantly relax as those beautiful brown eyes opened and looked up at her father. Charlie's voice was choked with tears of relief as he held his daughter's hand, bringing it gently to his mouth and kissing it.

"Dad..." she mumbled in a medicated slur. Her face scrunched up as her eyes adjusted to hospital light. She lifted her head off the bed, wincing in pain as she assessed her condition. "Dad...the baby..." She began to panic, her arms wrapping protectively around her middle.

"Shh shh," Charlie whispered. "The baby is fine, Bells. Everything is okay. You're both safe."

Sue reached down and stroked Bella's hair, glancing at me with a concerned smile. She knew I was in shock. Bella was becoming more and more lucid. She followed Sue's gaze until finally her eyes fell on me.

She gasped, choking back a sob as she saw me, the tears instantly flowing down her cheeks. I too could feel tears falling from my eyes. I couldn't last another_ second _away from her. I was at her side before she could blink. Her head fell back on the pillow as she looked up at me, the pain in her eyes more unbearable than the sight of her lying in a hospital bed.

Sue pulled a reluctant Charlie from Bella's side. "I'll be outside kiddo." he said.

Bella never tore her eyes from mine. She looked up at me as though I were an angel. I sat down on the edge of her bed, facing her. My hand found hers, lifting it to my cheek, feeling her touch against my face. She began to cry harder as soon as we touched and I froze, thinking I had hurt her. She read me like a book, shaking her head at me and pulling our clasped hands to her heart.

"Edward..." she whispered incredulously. I kissed her forehead softly, closing my eyes at the sound of my name on her lips. This moment was so bittersweet...but all I knew what that she was here. She was real. She was alive. The baby...._our baby_ was alive.

At the touch of my lips to her skin, she began to sputter and ramble. I almost smiled at her stammering, its familiarity more beautiful to me than anything in the world.

"I'm s-so sorry," she cried, sobs shaking her frail body. "I_ love_ you Edward, I never meant...there's so much to say...so much to explain..."

Her hand rested on her stomach. She sniffled loudly, suddenly unable to continue when I ever so gently, placed my hand over hers, feeling for the first time where she carried my child.

"Edward...I-"

I silenced her with my lips, unable to stop myself from kissing her. I kissed her so softly, as if she might break. The simple touch alone was enough to electrify me. Her tear filled eyes gazed up at me as I pulled away, filled with so many emotions, so many words.

"I know..." I whispered. "There_ is_ so much to say...but there's time for that. Time for us." My finger traced her cheek softly. I gingerly laid down beside her, careful to rest to her left side and not her right. With the utmost care, I encircled her with my arms, immediately feeling whole again.

"_Rest_, Bella." She looked up at me, with exhausted, loving eyes. _"Let me hold you._"

She settled into my arms. Simultaneously, both our hands came to rest on her abdomen. We smiled at each other. And incredible feeling of joy washed over me.

"I_ love _you, Isabella."

The sound of her deep, even breaths put me immediately at ease. I watched the hearts belonging to the loves of my life beat steadily across the monitor.

_**yayyyy for love. Please, please review. So many of you have this on story alert and I'm dying to know what you think of it. I will update as soon as I can. :)**_


	20. Chapter 20

**Hey everybody! Sorry about the delay. I just started my second semester and it's been kind of crazy lately. But don't worry! I'm still doing my best to keep posting. But R&R if you can because the more reviews I get, the more I'll want to continue the story. Thanks for being so absolutely wonderful thus far :)**

**BPOV**

I was lost in the dark for what seemed like an eternity. I could feel the pain ripping through my right side, I could feel hands on me, I could feel needles and latex gloves. Time meant nothing to me here in my own head. I was losing the fight to stay awake. There was just so much_ blood_.

Lost in my own oblivion, I let myself dream. I let myself imagine Edward beside me in our own little house by the beach. Our baby in his arms. His breathtaking crooked grin. I let myself imagine what it would have been like to have it _all_.

As I saw it all unfold before me in my mind, I never wanted to wake up.

Eventually the static chaos around me fizzled out into a silence interrupted only by the beeps of machines and the rustle of sheets. I was starting to swim my way to the surface.

I let go of the beautiful dream. Reluctantly trying to force myself awake. _ My baby._ _Edward's baby_. I had to know what happened. I was panicking here in the dark. I focused all of my energy towards getting back to reality, as painful as it may have been.

My eyes rolled in my head and I started to hear murmuring voices around me. Even though I couldn't understand, I could feel the familiarity in the voice. I felt relief when I understood I would wake up to see someone I knew.

"Bella?" My eyes fluttered at the sound of my father's voice. "Bella, honey can you hear me?"

The little girl inside of me cried out to him. My father, my protector. I felt so _weak_. Finally, I opened my eyes, blinking to try and clear the haze. As my they came into

focus I could see the worried face of my father before me. His eyes were streaming tears and his hand was around mine.

"Dad..."

I studied my surroundings for a spilt second, registering the machines, the harsh fluorescent lights and the pale blue hospital sheets. I lifted my head slightly to see how bad the damage was. Instantly, I felt the medicated ache tear through my right side. My eyes came to rest on my swollen belly. The terrifying reality came crashing down on me. My _baby_...

"Dad...the baby..." The sound of my weak, panicked, exhausted voice surprised me.

"Shh, shhh" Dad crooned. "The baby is fine, Bells. Everything is okay. You're both safe."

Immediately, I relaxed. _Thank God_. I smiled up at Sue, who was lovingly stroking my hair. I caught her glancing over to something behind Charlie. I followed her gaze, expecting to see a doctor or a nurse.

But there he was.

I could not contain the sob that escaped my throat when I laid my eyes on him. I knew he was real. I knew this wasn't a dream. The Edward in my dreams was full of happiness and light. The one standing just out of my reach, though just as beautiful, looked absolutely pale with worry and panic. His eyes connected with mine and it felt as though my heart was mending itself with his very gaze. I couldn't control my tears. And when the light fell on his face, I could see that he too had no such control.

He raced to my side and took my hand, pressing it against his tear stained cheek and closing his eyes at the feel of our connection. It felt so good to touch him again. The past months had been utter torture. I couldn't stop crying.

He looked up at me worriedly as I whimpered. I could tell he was afraid he had hurt me. His eyes looked me over like I was a piece of glass, cracked and ready to break. I had barely heard Charlie leave the room. I couldn't tear my eyes away from Edward. I was still in utter disbelief that he was _here. With me_. I pulled our enfolded hands to my chest, reassuring him that I needed his touch. I never wanted to let him go.

"Edward..."

He pressed his lips to my forehead_ so_ gently. I watched his eyes flit to the heart monitor for just a brief moment and then come back to me, taking me in. Then I realized he_ knew_. I looked down at my swelling torso. There was so much to explain. I started sputtering, needing him to hear my truth - my love. Needing him to hear my apologies. I was trembling as I rambled, absolutely overcome with emotion.

And then...his hand rested softly on mine, right over our baby. _Our_ baby. And I couldn't speak.

I couldn't tell what he was thinking. _ God,_ there was so much to say. So much to explain to him. Was he upset?

"Edward...I-"

I could utter no more as he brought his lips to meet mine. He kissed me so softly, so reverently...I thought my heart would beat its way out of my chest with joy.

"I know," he whispered. "There _is_ so much to say...But there's time for that. Time for us."

The rhythm in my chest became uneven yet again as I watched him lower himself down into bed beside me. He was so careful, so delicate with me...but I could see he needed his arms around me as much as I did.

"_Rest,_ Bella." I could only look up at him, unable to form words. I was simply reveling in this moment. I couldn't think about tomorrow or the next day...I knew there were trials ahead of us and so many things I had to tell him. But I could only feel his arms around me now. "_Let me hold you_." his voice sang.

Together, we placed one hand on the small bump that was my stomach. I grinned up at Edward, relieved to see the same joy in me reflected in his expression. He was _happy_.

I felt the darkness returning again. But this time, I was not afraid. Nothing could harm me while Edward held me....held _us_....in his arms. In no time at all, I was fast asleep.

____________________________________________________________________

The exhaustion of the entire ordeal must have really over taken me...because when I woke up, I had barely moved an _inch_. I was usually a restless sleeper, shifting and talking in my sleep. But I opened my eyes to find myself exactly how I had fallen asleep.

My stillness scared Edward. I woke up to see his handsome face watching me intently with concern and fear. He looked completely spent. Taking a deep breath I wiped the sleep from my eyes using my left hand. I tried to shift in the bed just slightly, but the weight I had to put on my right side left me biting my lip in attempt to keeping from crying out. My right arm felt like painful, dead weight, numb with medication.

Edward immediately started to fuss over me. He was in agony, not knowing how to help me. He got up out of bed, ready to go get a nurse. But I shuddered at the thought of more needles, more medication, more poking and prodding. I grabbed his hand, stopping him.

"It's okay...Will you help me sit up?" I asked, shocked again by how frail and weak my own voice sounded.

He found the button that raised the large hospital bed beneath me. As the bed raised, it pulled at my gown, tugging on the bandages. I winced as I reached out to Edward, his arms steadying me as I used my left arm to pull myself forward and adjust my body.

He adjusted my pillows and made sure I was comfortable again before pulling up a stool to sit down beside my bed. I looked at the clock. It was almost 3 in the afternoon. I brought my hand up to touch Edward's handsome face.

"Did you sleep at all? You look exhausted."

He caught my hand against his cheek, turning his head to kiss my palm.

"It's not so easy for me to sleep when you are like this." he said quietly. He started to fret, his eyes glancing to my middle and then back up to me. "You were so _still_. It frightened me. I couldn't tear my eyes away from the heart monitor."

He paused for a moment, his fingertips drawing circles on the back of my hand. He told me Charlie and Sue had gone home for a shower and some clean clothes. They would be back in the evening with more clothes for me as well.

I took a moment to remember the brief words spoken before I had fallen asleep. There was so much to say. I still was having trouble believing that he was here. That he told me he_ loved _me. After everything that I had said, everything I had kept from him.

"Edward..." I started slowly. "you...you're not angry with me?"

His eyes widened in shock. "Bella...how could I be _angry_ with you?"

I cursed my hormones as I started to cry.

"The things I said...on the phone...." I swallowed more tears. "And the baby...I never wanted to hurt you...I wanted to tell you...so many times, I wanted to tell you....but Larry..."

Edward moved to sit on the side of my bed now, facing me. His hands cupped my chin gently as he brought my eyes to look at his.

"What did he say to you, Bella?" The seriousness in his voice took me by surprise. I could see anger in his eyes. I took a deep breath.

"He told me you were exhausted. That our relationship was straining you more than you were telling me. That your family had asked him to come to me." I saw the shock on his face and I didn't know what to think. He was probably upset that Larry had told me the things he had been trying so hard to hide from me. That his secret was out.

"I didn't want to hurt you anymore, Edward. I didn't want to ruin your career by trying to keep you in a relationship that was running you into the ground. I couldn't bear it." I explained, desperate to fill the silence. "That's why when I found out I was..pregnant...I didn't know what to do. I thought...I thought it would ruin your _life_."

Those last words came out as a painful whisper. Edward's expression became so broken with hurt. I didn't know what to do. My heart ached as I thought of my words on the phone, the lies I told him. I cried even harder as I remembered it. I grabbed his hand, bringing it to my heart.

"But Edward, you have to know that I _do_ love you. _So much_. I_ never _stopped loving you. What I said on the phone...I didn't mean it. It was a lie. A _terrible,_ despicable lie."

His arms were around me in an instant. I was waiting for him to be upset with me, to push me away. But he kept his hold on me, gingerly avoiding my bandages. He kissed my forehead as he held me and let me cry. I felt like such an emotional basket case. But he was here, and he was_ holding_ me.

He pulled away, his hands encircling my face and his eyes searching mine. He opened his mouth to speak.

"Bella...Larry, he-"

Suddenly, we heard the sounds of commotion in the hallway outside my door. Loud voices echoed outside accompanied by the sound of many pairs of feet. Edward perked up as he heard them get closer.

"Is that...?" He turned and went to the door, peeking outside. The door flung open and a small, pixie looking girl threw her arms around Edward. Filing in behind her were more people. I thought back to the pictures I had seen at the Cullen house and started to recognize the faces of Alice, Emmett, Carlisle and Esme Cullen. With them was a gorgeous blonde woman and a man I didn't recognize. I could tell Edward was completely surprised. And_ I _was _immediately_ afraid.

"What are you guys doing here?" Edward asked, still bewildered.

"You haven't called or given us any news since early this morning!" Alice cried. Esme placed her hand lovingly on Edward's shoulder.

"We were worried." she said softly. "And Alice isn't one to be left hanging, you know that."

Esme turned to look at me. I felt my cheeks burn as I looked down timidly at my hands. She must hate me. They had wanted me out of their son's life for good, and now...Well, now things were much, much different. I placed a hand protectively on my belly, afraid of what was to happen next, feeling the need to protect _both_ of us.

I gulped loudly and looked up to see her staring at me with nothing but love and affection. Edward watched lovingly as his mother came to my bed side, everyone else was frozen in place, staring at me.

As she reached the bed, Esme scooped up my hand in hers and stroked my hair.

"Hello, Bella." she said softly, her voice so sweet and soothing. "I'm Esme, I'm Edward's mother."

"H-hello..." I stuttered, taken completely by surprise at her kindness. Hadn't she just hired Larry to come and rip Edward and I apart? I stared into her eyes, trying to detect a false front...but could find none. She was genuinely concerned for me. _What was I missing?_

With as much grace and care as her son, she embraced me. I felt my eyes fill with tears and my lower lip start to tremble. Instantly, I knew she would become very close to my heart.

"_It's okay_..." she crooned. Soon her husband appeared at her side, his warm smile just as genuine as hers.

"It's so nice to finally meet you, Bella." he said as he introduced himself and his family. Something about his voice and his presence put me at ease. Alice and Emmett introduced Rosalie and Jasper, who both had nothing but smiles for me. These were _kind_ people. These were the kind of people I could _love_. I looked up at Edward, utterly confused, but unable to hide my smile.

Then I noticed. All eyes were on the heart monitor and Esme's hand was resting on my swollen torso. I looked up at her, paralyzed by fear, unable to speak.

Before I could begin to stutter my way through an explanation, the door burst open. The one and only Larry Krutch entered my room. Edward flew to his feet, his fists balled at his side. Carlisle was quick to grab his son's wrist, holding him firmly where he stood. Alice reached down and held my hand as Jasper and Emmet stood protectively between me and Krutch.

I looked at Edward who was absolutely fuming. Larry froze as he saw the Cullens standing around me. I watched his panic transform to a cool, collected facade as he tried to compose himself.

"Bella!" he said, his voice thick with false kindness. "So nice to finally meet you!" He said, his eyes _begging_ me to play along. I looked at Edward's expression again, as well as his family's and I did not answer him. "So sorry to hear about your accident...I heard through the grapevine that you might be here, Eddie."

"You mean Tanya? Or perhaps you remembered your way back to Forks from _previous_ visits?" Edward replied. Larry's face turned to ash.

My hands curled tighter around Alice, who looked down and me and smiled brightly. She made me feel safe...just like Edward always had. I barely knew the Cullen family, but my trust was immediately in their hands. It wasn't hard to figure out that Larry was obviously on the wrong side of the Cullens' and I was stuck in the middle.

The caring gentleman I had foolishly mistook him for was long gone now as he looked at all of us with a smile on his face and _hate_ in his eyes. As I saw Edward's anger, I _knew_. How blind I was!

It was _Larry_. The Cullens never wanted me to disappear. _Larry_ did.

"Well," Larry said briskly. He sounded like a circus clown, the cheer in his voice was so over the top. "Edward, I came down because _you_ were missing from the shoot today. I can't have people wondering where you are, you know." he laughed uncomfortably. The plastic smile faded when none of the Cullens responded. He hadn't expected to see them here. It had thrown him off his game. "This movie is a huge opportunity for you."

_How had I not seen through this? _I remembered Sue that morning at home, telling me I had been ruled by my self doubt. That I _was_ worth it. I had been so worried that I would be the source of Edward's career problems, all Larry had to do was affirm my fear. Larry had seen my weakness and exploited it. How had I been so _stupid_?

"Larry..." Edward said in a low, menacing voice.

Larry looked at me on the bed. The expression on his face was pure evil. His face was a mask of polite concern, but his eyes were shooting daggers.

"Hope to see you up and about again soon, Miss Swan." he sneered. "But Edward has somewhere to be." He raised his eyebrows at me wickedly as if to say, _I thought we had a deal_.

"I'm. Not. Going. _Anywhere_." Edward growled. Carlisle had one hand on his shoulder. I could feel the tension between the family and the skinny publicist before me. Anger and annoyance flashed across Larry's face. He lost his mask and lashed out, pointing his finger in Edward's face.

"You _will_ go back, Edward. You _owe _me." he spat.

Carlisle let go of his son as Edward brought himself to his full height, staring down at Larry, who began to shrink before him.

"I owe you _nothing_. Take your things and leave." he commanded through his teeth. The authority in his voice was frightening. His family stood firmly behind him.

"Edward..." Larry started.

"_I said leave_."

Larry let out a loud huff, turning angrily towards the door and pacing in front of it, itching to have the last word.

"You _need_ me, Edward! Look at the career I've helped you build! If it weren't for that _bitch_, I'd-"

Edward stalked towards Larry, closing the gap between them in three strides and slamming his fist across Larry's jaw. I jumped as I heard his knuckles connect with Larry's flesh and watched his body hit the ground as he was knocked out _cold_.

It was as if he fell in slow motion. And as he fell to the floor, we watched in silence as a pair of dice rolled from his pocket.

Time sped up again as two nurses entered the room, fussing over the unconscious man on the floor. The Cullens knit an even tighter circle around me. Alice pulled Edward back towards the bed and shut the curtains around us. Emmett gave Edward a playful punch on the shoulder as Edward flexed his hand, his knuckles sore.

"Didn't think you had it in you! K.O. on the first punch!" he laughed. Edward could barely smile. His eyes found mine. I was speechless.

"Larry lied to you, Bella." He came to sit facing me on my bed. I nodded in understanding now. But I felt my eyes well up again. I had been _so foolish_. Edward had told me once that I had to be careful who I trusted. I knew he was right...but old habits die hard. This one had cost me precious time with the one I loved.

"I didn't think...I didn't know..."

Esme put her hand on mine. "It's alright, Bella."

I looked at the family surrounding me and I felt nothing but love radiating from each of them.

"Don't you worry about anything but taking care of my grand baby." said Esme lovingly, a twinkle in her eye. The way she looked at me, it was as if we could see the truth in each other. We had barely met, but there was trust between us. And love.

The evening came and Charlie and Sue returned, becoming instant friends with the Cullen family. The afternoon had been an eventful one, followed by the re hashing of stories about Larry, about the shooting, I learned more about the family and felt safe with them. They didn't judge me at all. They only loved me.

When it grew dark out, the Cullens decided to make a quick get away to their house by the shore, telling Edward and I to come and stay when we felt up to it. Alice promised to be back to visit me tomorrow to help me pack up and get me home. All afternoon she had been completely adorable. Braiding my hair as we talked to the family asking me so many questions. I was feeling stronger by the hour, though completely sore and aching, love had truly been an effective healing power.

Edward didn't go with his family, he refused to leave my side. Charlie and Sue stayed to make sure I was eating enough and being taken well care of. But how could my father complain with someone as devoted as Edward beside me? Sue winked at me knowingly and convinced Dad I would be fine for the night. I loved that woman.

When we were finally alone, Edward carefully hopped into bed beside me again. His hands traced my cheek as he looked over every inch of me. We memorized each others faces, still completely happy that this was real, that we were back together...and that we had never loved each other more.

I was emotionally and physically exhausted. That afternoon I had laid everything out on the table. I couldn't keep anything from Edward, not after being away from him so long. I could no longer "suffer in silence" as my dad called it. I explained to him what had run through my head when Larry came to speak with me. I told him that I had kept things from him too, to keep him from worrying, and that was part of why I so easily fell for the lie. Everything came gushing out of me...the Rec Center, the diner. There were no secrets between us now. My heart felt lighter and my body felt more at ease. Even the doctor had been worried that stress could effect me and the baby, insisting that I do nothing but rest for now. At those words, Edward had run to grab extra pillows, going out of his way to make sure I was comfortable.

And now it was night time and the hospital wing was fairly quiet. The emotions, the stress, the worry...it was all gone now. Edward had erased them from my mind simply by wrapping his arms around me. We still had many obstacles ahead of us. But at the moment, I felt untouchable.

"Is there anything you need?" he asked softly, kissing my forehead. "I'd be happy to get it for you."

"Well at the moment, there's not really anything I _need._" I said, looking up at him playfully. He bent his head low to kiss me deeply, taking the breath from my lungs. His lips moved over mine so perfectly, molding themselves to my every move. He pulled away to look at me with a sparkle in those green eyes. It was the first time today I had seen them without worry or fear or sadness. We had made it through quite a storm. Edward brought me nothing but blue skies for miles with his perfectly crooked grin.

"Anything you _want_?" he asked with a laugh.

"A shower." I grinned.

We both laughed, the vibrations of the joyful sound in our bodies humming against each other. Slowly, I sat up on my own, still feeling the ache in my right shoulder and my upper chest. Edward watched me with wide eyes, his hand supporting my back as I moved.

I should have been focused on trying to keep from moving too much, but my brain could only handle one thing at a time. And right now, it was the feel of Edward's hand on my bare back, exposed by the flimsy hospital robes. His touch never failed to set me on fire. Even in times like these.

He watched me curiously, waiting to see what I would do.

"Will you help me?" I asked meekly, gesturing to the bathroom doors. I desperately wanted a shower. Edward got up and came to my side of the bed, helping me put on the sling the nurses had left for me that I hadn't bothered to use. I guess I _had_ always been a stubborn child.

I could see Edward was nervous and unsure. I wanted him to relax. I wasn't about to go sky diving, I just wanted a _shower_. I slowly swung my legs over the edge of the bed. I wanted to show him I was getting stronger, that I was okay. His arms were out in front of me, waiting to catch me if I fell. But I used my left hand to help myself down out of bed and I put my feet onto the cold tile floor. I smiled proudly as I looked up at Edward and saw that he was impressed.

It didn't keep him from holding me around the waist with one hand and supporting my elbow with the other all the way to the bathroom. I was happy to find that Sue had brought me shampoo and soap. Edward closed the door behind us and turned to me. I could see so much love in his eyes I thought I might burst. But he was scared too. He didn't want to hurt me.

I turned around slowly and felt his fingers tremble slightly as they untied the back of my robe and carefully lowered the thin fabric until it was past my bandages and on the floor. I smiled as I heard him suck in his breath when I turned around to face him. His eyes drank in my body, new with the emerging curves of pregnancy. They narrowed just slightly when they came to rest on my bandages.

"I'll try not get them wet," I assured him, the nurse would be back to change them anyway in about an hour. He finally tore his eyes away from me and started the shower, opening the sliding glass door for me and helping me in.

I did my best to keep my right shoulder out of the hot water as it rolled down my body. I let out a sigh of relief. When my hair was completely wet, I slide the door open just slight and stuck my left hand out for soap, peeking at Edward. He was sitting on top the toilet lid, staring at me through the glass doors. He jumped to attention when he heard me laugh at him and squirted about a quarters worth of shampoo into my open palm. Even in (or out of) a ridiculous hospital gown, I reveled in the fact that I drove him just as crazy as he drove me.

When I had finished, I turned off the water and slid the steam covered door open to find Edward waiting for me with a large, white, terry towel in his open arms. I stepped into his embrace as he wrapped the towel around me and gently started to dry me off. His eyes never left mine as he knelt to dry my legs and worked his way up my body. He stopped when his eyes became level with my torso, placing a careful, warm hand over my belly and leaving small kisses across its surface.

I could get used to this.

When he was certain had dried every inch of my wet skin, he wrapped the towel around me again from behind. My back leaned into his chest as we caught our reflection in the foggy mirror, smiling at each other in the glass pane. He peppered soft kisses on my neck and smiled back at me in the mirror. His arms encircled me and came to rest around my belly. He was holding _both_ of us.

The future was an uncertain thing and the world had definitely proved itself to be just as unpredictable. But I knew in that moment, in that small fragment of time...that as long as Edward was beside me...I had no fear or doubt. Only infinite, unconditional, unyielding _love_.

**Will continue when I can! This isn't the last chapter but I am going to start wrapping this story up. Thank you so much you guys! R&R pretty please. **


	21. Chapter 21

**Sorry for the delay, my schedule is absolutely **_**insane.**_** Thanks so much for sticking with me :)**

**EPOV**

My eyes fell over Bella's beautiful skin under the pale light from the window beside our bed. _Our bed._ Even though I had spent my summers as a boy in this bed, it didn't belong to me anymore. It wasn't really mine without her in it. Her body was stretched out elegantly beneath cotton sheets and my old fleece blanket. She fit so _perfectly_ here in the house, in my arms. This place just wasn't the same without her here.

Esme had lovingly convinced Charlie to let Bella stay with us. He admitted her room had become some what of a storage space and she needed some room to recover. Though I could see the hesitance in his eyes, all of us were in agreement that she would _not_ be returning to her apartment.

Bella had been reluctant to agree to this until she knew that Mrs. Faye was being well taken care of. In the weeks following the incident, Annie and Roy had been caught on the outskirts of town. With further investigation, and with the help of Bella's police statement, Annie lost her nursing license and was taken to jail along with Roy for a list of various felonies. Mrs. Faye was offered a beautiful room at St. Rose nursing home by a local outreach program.

Bella had insisted on seeing the home for herself before letting Mrs. Faye move in. It only made sense that she had trouble trusting nurses. I thought back to her smile as Charlie brought her back home from their visit that day. Her eyes were glassy with emotion...relief, happiness, and a little nostalgia. I felt these things _for _her. Finally, my girl would be given the chance to take of _herself _for once. And Mrs. Faye was safe and happy in her new home.

My family was falling madly in love with Bella every day she spent with us. And I could see by the look in Bella's eyes that the feeling was mutual. Esme took meticulous care of Bella's wounds. I'm convinced that's why she was healing so fast. The bullet holes had become small, raised, pink scars on Bella's chest and back. I shuddered when I thought of what _could_ have happened. I could have _lost_ her for good. I could have lost my _daughter_. Everything I had dreamed of with her...a life, a family, a future. It could have disappeared in an _instant_.

With that thought, the need to touch her overwhelmed me. I shifted my body closer to her in bed until my chest was pressed perfectly against her back and my arms rested over her waist, hands around her swollen torso. I smiled into her hair, breathing her in. Moments like these with Bella made me feel whole. I usually had to pry Alice away from Bella's side if I wanted any alone time with her. The two had become inseparable friends, not to mention, Emmett was constantly making her laugh. Getting him, a bear of a brother, to buzz off wasn't always the easiest thing to do. Especially when he enjoyed telling Bella all of my most embarrassing boyhood moments.

Bella stirred in her sleep and rolled over, her belly perfectly round...I always wanted to touch it, to know the being inside of her was safe there, under my hands. She came to rest on her other side, now facing me. Her eye lids fluttered slightly as she mumbled to herself. I smiled, happy to hear her slurred speech as she dreamt. It put me at ease. That first night in the hospital, she was _so still_. Too still. It was the most intense, stressful night of my life.

Suddenly, Bella's eyes shot open, her whole body flinching. Her deep brown eyes held no fear as I searched them frantically for explanation. She sat up straight in bed and I mirrored her actions just as quickly.

"Bella...?" I pushed her curtain of brown curls aside from her face. She had both hands on her stomach, her eyes were wide with shock, and a strange grin growing on her face. I thought maybe she had had a nightmare or a bizarre dream. Sometimes she would wake up from especially vivid ones dazed and confused. Nothing scared me more than a 6 months pregnant Bella jumping awake in the middle of the night. But something was different this time...

"Edward -" before she could finish she flinched again. Her hand flew to her mouth and she started to giggle, turning to look at me with a light in her eyes. "Give me your hand."

Her small, warm hands wrapped around mine and brought them to rest on her belly. My heart beat faster with anticipation. I had seen Bella make this face several times in the past couple weeks and somehow I had always missed it, my hands never reaching her belly in time to feel it. I had been waiting anxiously to finally catch it. It was another reason I couldn't keep my hands off of Bella.

Sure enough, I felt a soft flutter underneath my hands. I looked at Bella, my expression matching hers. Our eyes were wide with joy and amazement. Slowly, she laid down again, her hand over mine against her abdomen. She was beaming up at me with a smile that could have killed me.

"She's hyper tonight." Bella said softly. I leaned down to press my lips on her round middle, feeling the pressure of my daughter moving beneath my hands. I laid down beside Bella, kissing her gently, feeling her fingers running through my unruly hair.

"I'm so glad I finally got to _feel _that." still in awe.

There was a long pause between us. It was comfortable, but I could tell Bella wasn't telling me something. My eyes traveled over her face, trying to read her thoughts.

"What is it, Bella?" I whispered.

"I just...I just think it's time, Edward."

I sighed, my head falling gently in the crook of her neck. We had had this discussion several times over the past couple months. I remembered the first time she brought it up.

"_Edward, I think...I think we shouldn't have to hide anymore." she said meekly. I paused, registering what exactly she meant._

"_Going public, Bella? Do you realize what that means? No privacy - ever again. For us, for our baby..." As I thought of all the possibilities, I felt my voice raise just slightly. I was starting to panic as I imagined paparazzi chasing Bella with a baby in her arms, flashing cameras, men hounding her._

_I felt Bella's hands on my face as she brought my eyes to meet hers._

"_You think I haven't thought about it?" she said as she pushed the hair from my forehead lovingly. "I'm not afraid of it, Edward."_

_I looked up at her, searching her eyes. She was sure. There was no doubt or fear in those beautiful brown pools. She smiled at me, her grin giving me strength. She kissed me, running her index finger down my cheek as she pulled away to look into my eyes again._

"_If there is anything I've learned this year," she said. "it's that life is short. Too short, Edward. Too short to lose time with you. Too short to spend it trying to hide or sneak around. Is it so wrong that I want the world to know I belong to you?"_

_My heart melted. I opened my mouth to speak, but she silenced me with a finger to my lips._

"_I know it may not always be easy and that there will be obstacles to face, rumors to ignore and paparazzi to run from. But I want to run with you. Let me run with you."_

_I wrapped my arms around her, still so in awe that this woman loved me so much, so selflessly. But the thought of her and eventually our daughter being bombarded with this crazy lifestyle...it was hard for me to swallow. _

"_Just give me some time." I promised her._

"Bella...I..."

I watched as she rolled her head on the pillow, her eyes looking away from me. It broke my heart to see her turn from me that way.

"I just want to protect you, Bella. I never want _anything_ to happen to you...to our baby...I just..."

Bella turned to look at me, but still would not speak. She nodded her head in understanding, smiling at me sadly, trying to reassure me she was okay with my decision. But I knew her too well. Before I could fuss about it she wrapped her arms around my neck, hugging me close to her. She was a pro at making me forget about any worries or fears. Just by touching me, the world fell away.

"Soon." I promised. I felt her smile against my neck.

"Kiss me..." she breathed, her lips brushing my ear lobe as she whispered.

_God_, I love her.

Her lips were warm and soft, dancing with mine as I held her impossibly tighter to my body. I could _never_ get enough of this woman. My tongue begged for entrance, begged to taste her. She did not deny me.

I felt her hands roam over my shoulders and down my bare back. Her lips lingered longer, her kiss became deeper, her breath came faster. Her warm, wet mouth traveled up my neck, making my blood run faster. This dance was a familiar one...I knew what she wanted.

I felt Bella wrap her legs around me and let out an adorable giggle as I kissed her neck. My teeth found the thin strap of her tank top and dragged it slowly down her shoulders.

Our soft laughter continued as we wriggled out of our pajamas. There was nothing sweeter than being completely bare beside her, skin to skin. I had learned how to be careful in the last few months as Bella got bigger and bigger. With some practice we had learned how to move like water, how to function and connect. I was initially afraid of what might happen to the baby, but the doctor assured us we were okay. Thank _God. _

Because now that Bella and I were together again...there was _no way_ I could keep from touching her.

Bella moaned beneath me as my hands traced her curves, running over her hips, up to her breasts, to her collarbone. My mouth following their trail. Her back arched against me as my mouth back to her breasts, adorning them with kisses.

"_Edward..._"

_Say my name again._.. I made my way back to her mouth. I kissed her hard, willing all of my love to manifest itself in this kiss before I slowly entered her.

"_Edward.._.!" she gasped beneath me. As I started to move inside her, I saw her lust filled eyes light up with playfulness. Before I knew it I was on my back.

My breath hitched in my throat as I looked up at the beautiful, sexy woman before me. Her new curves were the gift of the child inside her, _my child_ inside her, and nothing could be more _stunning._

We fell into an easy rhythm. Bella's eyes were shining brightly at me under eye lids heavy with want and love. She bent down, peppering my chest with open, wet kisses. Time disappeared.

I sat up slowly as we moved, needing my arms around her. Our embrace never broke as we moved faster, the room falling away until there was nothing but us. My lips never left her skin as she moaned in my arms.

"_Bella_..." I breathed, unable to control the noises coming from my throat. I was so close, _so close_.

I felt her walls close around me as she climaxed... and I was _gone_.

I buried my face in her neck as we caught our breath, feeling her kiss my forehead as we eased down into the sheets.

Cool cotton covered me as Bella dragged the sheets up my body, her eyes never leaving mine as she moved.

Can a person die from happiness?

I rolled onto my side to face her. Her eyes were closed but she was smiling, squeezing my hand. I knew then that she was right. We shouldn't have to hide. _God,_ I wanted the world to know she was _mine_. That I was _hers._ I wanted to walk outside on the street with her beside me, holding my hand. I didn't want to waste time looking over my shoulder when I could be looking at _her_.

"Bella," I whispered. Her smile widened.

"Yes?"

"I wanna take you out on a date." Her eyes opened, looking at me curiously. "A real date."

"A real date?" she was grinning with excitement.

"Tomorrow night, I'm going to take you out." I kissed her nose. "But we still have to be careful okay? I don't know if..."

"_Edward_."

She kissed me sweetly.

"You're safe, remember?"

**More on the way. Again, sorry for making you all wait. Please, please forgive me. The more reviews I get the sooner I will update. I just need to know if people are still into this story. much love**


	22. Chapter 22

**Thank you guys so much for your reviews! Made my day :)**

**BPOV**

Esme placed a steaming, delicious stack of pancakes before me on the kitchen table. Breakfast had become my favorite meal since the Cullens came to Forks. I grinned widely up at her as I grabbed my fork and dug in. I heard Emmett snickering at me from across the table.

"You look like you've never seen food before, Bells." he chuckled. I gave him a toothy, childish smile as I took another bite.

I really loved Emmett. He and Alice were like the siblings I never had. The whole family, they were just a dream come true.

Alice practically danced her way downstairs, talking on her headset. The home office at the house was incredible. Alice could conference with people half way around the world without a problem. Staying here in Forks hadn't affected her work at all. And from what she told me during late night conversations by the fire, her and Jasper really needed the time away.

I had been worried after the first week staying with the Cullens that I was keeping them from their lives in L.A. Esme and Carlisle were the first to ease my concerns.

"We have earned every penny we have made," Esme said. "And we certainly have earned some time with our family. It has been years since we have been under the same roof for more than a week. You've brought us back together, Bella."

I had worried most about Edward. He had been half way through shooting his movie when he returned to Forks for me. After a lot of begging and debating, I was finally able to convince him to go back to the last week of shooting and voice overs. We practically had to shove him out the door, but he finally went. He made sure to call me everyday, more than once, worried sick about me and the baby. It was adorable really.

He couldn't even make it the full week. As soon as his last shots were done, he flew back to us. I remembered sitting with Alice on the front porch when Emmett's car pulled in the drive way and Edward practically wrenched the passenger side door off, flying up the stairs and surrounding me in his arms before I could even make it to the top step.

"You were gone _four_ days!" I laughed in between his kisses. In truth the four days had seemed like an eternity.

"Too long..." was all he could mumble as he kissed me again.

I had only known these people a few months, but they felt like blood relatives. Alice just had an air about her that exuded trust and loyalty. I knew I could tell her anything. Emmett was instantly protective of me and was constantly checking on me to see if I needed anything. Mostly to see if I was hungry. Because Emmett...was _always_ hungry. He would take any excuse he could get to go into the kitchen and build a masterpiece of food.

I adored Carlisle and Esme. I hoped that Edward and I would learn to be such good parents. And they were so in love! I could see it in the way Esme blushed whenever Carlisle looked at her just so...giving her the same crooked grin his son had so perfectly mastered.

"I think Bella needs more pancakes, Ma." Emmett mumbled between bites. I looked down at my plate. Sure enough, I had scarfed almost all of them down.

I rolled my eyes at him and took my plate to the sink, grabbing the sponge and taking the rest of the dirty dishes off the table. Esme raised her eyebrow at me. She had learned not to argue with me when I helped clean up or did dishes. The first week she had insisted I was _her guest_...blah blah blah. That ended quickly. I couldn't stand to be waited on.

Besides, doing dishes beside Esme had become one of my favorite things to do. The mindless task gave us time to talk, to laugh, to dream about futures. Esme was terribly excited about her granddaughter. We submerged our hands in bubbles and started to clean.

I felt him in the room even before his arms wrapped around me. Edward kissed my cheek and rubbed my belly. I turned around to face him. _ God,_ he was beautiful. He was wearing a plain white t-shirt and his flannel pajama pants. Nobody could pull off bed head like Edward Cullen. _Nobody_. His cute, sleepy face was smiling down at me.

"Good morning." he grinned. I loved the look on his face at this exact moment. I thought of making love to him last night. I could see him thinking of it too. His eyes were all lit up as though he knew a secret. A secret saved just for me.

I dried my hands and made him a plate of pancakes. He pressed his lips to my forehead and sat down beside his brother. I heard Alice hang up her phone and enter the kitchen, the latest edition of Cosmopolitan in hand.

"Horoscope anyone?"

"Nah..." Emmett groaned. "You know those horoscopes are a load of bull, Alice. They can't predict the future."

Alice narrowed her eyes at her brother and stuck out her tongue. Jaspers appeared at her side and wrapped his arms around his wife.

"You can read mine, baby." he said lovingly. Emmett rolled his eyes. Edward chuckled under his breath.

Alice rattled off Jasper's horoscope. Nothing even _remotely_ relative to him.

"See? Told you. It's all crap." Emmett exclaimed.

"Well when all your stars aligned you never know!" Alice said defensively.

"I wish we could see more stars in Forks." I heard myself say, plunging my hands deeper in the warm water. I could feel Esme's eyes on me.

"It's just that it's always so cloudy in Forks, it's hard to see them."

"Your horoscope is looking decent, Bella." Alice said. I only half listened as she mumbled off something about health, wealth and all that jazz. It didn't really apply completely, but I guess horoscopes were a hit or miss. I finished the dishes and dried my hands as I listened, never quite able to take my eyes off of Edward as Alice read.

He was just so...so...wonderful in every way imaginable. I couldn't believe how lucky we were. I smiled to myself as I thought about our date tonight. I was so excited to finally just go out and be with him. I was thrilled that he understood finally what it meant to me to be able to be with him without worry or care.

I had stopped being afraid of the "what-ifs" a long time ago. After almost losing Edward, after being _shot_ for christssake...I didn't have any time to waste hiding from the inevitable. Edward was my life.

After breakfast, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Edward and I decided to go out on the boat. The weather was particularly nice for Forks. The sun was just barely peaking out, but the air was getting warmer and the wind was good for sailing. Though I wasn't sure how my pregnant body would handle sailing at first, after a good hour on deck, I became so comfortable with the boat humming in the water beneath us, I didn't ever want to move.

Alice plopped down beside me on the cushions towards the bow of the boat.

"So," she said with a grin. "Edward's finally taking you out?"

I nodded, unable to hide my excitement. Alice squealed at my confirmation.

"Oh I have the perfect thing for you to wear!"

I laughed as she rattled off labels I had never heard of. I could see Edward rolling his eyes as he came to lay down beside me in the pale sunlight.

"Alice," he sighed. "It's just a date, its not the Oscars. Give the girl a break."

He smiled as he rested his head against my ever expanding belly. "Your aunt Alice is a nutcase." he whispered to our daughter. I shook with laughter. Alice huffed grumpily but couldn't help but smile.

"Where are you taking me, anyway?" I asked, still giggling as I looked down at him. He made me so damn _giddy._

"Not telling." He smiled smugly. He kissed his way up my belly until he finally reached my lips.

"Get a room." Alice laughed.

"Get _out._" Edward chuckled in response. Alice snorted and jumped to her feet to go find her husband.

Edward rested on his side, head propped up on his elbow as he looked at me. I felt completely at peace beside him. I took a deep breath, closing me eyes and feeling him near me.

"I could stay like this for hours." I said. I heard him chuckle softly.

"You're really not going to tell me where we're going?" I asked, opening my eyes to see Edward seal his lips and throw away the key. "It's _Forks_, Edward. There's nothing fancy out here. You could take me to _Burger King_ and I'd be content."

"Don't worry Bella, you'll like it. I promise."

"Anything I do with you I _know_ I'll love." I assured him.

____________________________________________

"Here, try this on." Alice called from her giant walk-in closet.

"I'm a _whale_, Alice. What could you possibly own that would fit me?" I said as I entered the room.

"I made them, silly."

I stopped in my tracks as I looked down to see a pair of dark denim jeans complete with elastic waist band, and a dark blue baby doll top, big enough for my giant stomach.

"Alice! These are wonderful!" I said as she put them in my arms. "You didn't have to -"

"I know." she smiled. "I _wanted_ to."

She gave me a hug and then immediately ordered me to put on her clothes so she could work on my hair and make up. About an hour later she had me standing in front of the mirror grinning like an idiot. She had transformed me. Edward always made me feel beautiful and sexy...but this was the first time I could actually _see_ it.

"Alice!" I heard Edward call from downstairs. "We're going to be late!"

Alice rolled her eyes and accompanied me downstairs. As I came down the steps, I watched Edward's mouth fall open just slightly as his eyes drank in my body. The smile on his face was one I wanted to keep forever.

"Damn, Bells." Emmett said with a laugh. Edward punched him in the arm and stepped forward to take my hand. He rested forehead against mine. I could tell he was nervous but he looked me in the eyes and whispered. "_Safe._"

I knew we would be okay.

We drove into town a ways before the car finally pulled up to an old building on Juniper Ave.

"Is that...?"

"I thought dinner and a movie," Edward started. "But that's completely unoriginal. Besides, you said yourself, you wished we could see more stars in Forks."

I looked up at the old building and smiled back at Edward. We were parked in front of the Forks Planetarium.

"Come on," he said with that crooked grin. "We're going to miss the show."

Taking his hand, we stepped from the curb and into the building. I could tell he was fighting the urge to look over his shoulder. But so far, so good. We hadn't received more than one or two lingering glances so far and we were about to be safe inside, perfectly surrounded by darkness and billions of stars.

The employee at the ticket booth was a dinosaur of an old man. He barely blinked at Edward as he paid for our tickets. I laughed as Edward turned around with a look of pure relief on his face and guided me into the dark room ahead. I knew Edward was playing it safe by bringing me here, but I could care less. There weren't many people out and this part of town wasn't always active at this time of night.

As we settled back into the reclining planetarium seats I whispered, "I think we may actually be okay! Nobody will see us, there's no one around."

I could see his smile in the dark. "Don't get too excited. They usually catch you when you least expect if you get too comfortable." he laughed, squeezing my hand. _Ohh._

"_Look._" he whispered.

I brought my eyes to face the giant screen covering the walls and ceiling. The room was illuminated as billions of stars came to life before us. I gasped as they appeared, struck by their multitude and absolute beauty. I had never seen so _many_.

We barely listened as the narrator began to describe the celestial bodies displayed above us. We both stared wide eyed at the stars as the minutes passed, completely absorbed in the sheer magnitude of the universe recreated on the screen.

I felt my daughter begin to dance inside me. Without tearing my eyes from the screen, I grabbed Edward's hand and placed it on my belly. The fluttering would not end. It was as if she could feel how happy we both were. Here in this moment.

I turned to look at Edward, his eyes shining brighter than the stars above us. I saw nothing but pure unconditional love in his eyes as he moved closer to me, wrapping his arms around me and his daughter.

His hand came to rest on my cheek. I watched as the light from the star show danced across his face and thought of Christmas Eve. The way those lights had flickered across his skin. The way my heart had never felt so full...until now.

Edward was looking at me now with pure adoration, as though I might disappear if he blinked. Lovingly, he moved a strand of unruly hair from my face. I felt my heart fly at his touch and the heat creep up my face.

"Marry me, Isabella." he whispered.

**Yay updates! I couldn't **_**not **_**write today. I just had to update again. Thanks for the reviews keep them coming!!!!**


	23. Chapter 23

**I really should be doing homework. But screw it. It's all for you guys. All for you. I love you.**

**EPOV**

I had been waiting far too long to ask her. Saying the words out loud felt _amazing._ Wanting,_ needing_ her to be my wife was a truth I had felt in my gut long before I had the words. I had thought of all the ways I could say it. When and where, what it would be like. I had been keeping my grandmother's ring, a gift from my father, in my pocket for the last couple months now, waiting for the right words, the right time.

"She's beautiful, Edward. She has a good heart." Carlisle said to me that day, placing the ring in my hand. It was perfect for Bella. The band was a beautiful white gold, the stone cute in a perfect oval. "You'll _know,_ you'll feel it." He loved Bella. He knew after the very first night at the hospital that she was the one for me. She was_ it_.

Sitting beside her now, watching the starlight dance across her face, across her beautiful, round belly...the words _arrived_. They were simple. They were short. But they meant _so _much. I could go on forever and _never_ be able to encompass in words what I felt for her.

"I want to spend _forever_ with you." I whispered. "_Please say yes_."

I watched as a smile splayed across her face and her brown eyes filled to the brim with tears. Her bottom lip quivered slightly as she looked up at me. _ Beautiful._

I knew she understood. That's what was so beautiful about Bella. Without me saying anything she understood the love I was filled with and that it existed only for _her._ I knew she understood it wasn't about getting married simply because she was carrying my child. She knew it was because I had loved her since the moment I _met_ her.

She brought her face close to mine, her lips only a breath away, her nose against mine. She giggled softly and my smile became a permanent fixture on my face. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she kissed me.

"Yes." she cried. "_Yes_."

_She said yes._

Her warm mouth met mine, our lips moving so perfectly together, our breath escaping us. Our hands were tangled in each other's hair. We were kissing like it was our last day together, when really...this was just the beginning.

"Bella..." Her lips silenced me. I could feel her tears and her smile as she pulled herself closer to me. I placed both hands on each side of her face as we caught our breath. I knew I probably had the most ridiculous grin on my face, but I didn't care. Nothing could touch me right now.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the ring, smiling to myself when I heard her gasp at the sight of it.

"E-Edward..." Her hand flew to her mouth and the tears continued.

She had _never_ been more _beautiful_.

I reached out and took her small hand in mine, sliding my grandmother's ring onto her finger. Her breath caught in her throat.

I held her hand tightly, the ring sparkling in the dark underneath millions of stars. It _belonged_ on her. She smiled at me under wet eye lashes, bringing our hands to rest on her middle, where our daughter was kicking and moving wildly. I was beaming.

And it was just the beginning.

_____________________________________________________________________

We made our way out to the car without more than a few awkward stares from people on the streets. Neither of us could erase our smiles as we clung to one another.

I could not let go of her hand the entire ride to the restaurant. I was a little nervous now that we were going out to a more public place. But my elation over our engagement...our _engagement_....over rode anything that could make me fear or doubt.

Both of us were grinning like idiots as we made our way up the sidewalk to Davinci's.

I heard foot steps behind us and I started to get nervous. Bella thought nothing of it and continued to hold tightly to my hand.

I continued to smile until I heard that ever familiar _click_. Biting my tongue I did my best to ignore it.

I kept walking, but I turned to look at Bella. She had heard it too. Reaching slowly, she gently rubbed my arm and gave me a reassuring smile.

"We're okay. It's okay." she said.

I was trying hard to hold onto that feeling of complete elation. But more foot steps were behind us now.

"_Is that....?_

"_Who is she!?_

"_Edward!"_

My breathing increased slightly as I quickened my pace. Bella did not follow. Her pace stayed the same, forcing me to slow down again.

She had the face of a warrior and a smile of a goddess. She wrapped her arm around me waist and we continued to walk. Her closeness, her warmth, was bringing me back to the present, pushing my panic back down.

I could hear people around us, in front of us snapping photos and asking questions, but I could only look at_ her_. My girl. My _fiance_. Ready to face the world. Ready to risk everything for_ me._

We made it inside the restaurant, the door closing behind us and making all the noise disappear. Bella still had her on her brave smile as we were seated towards the back of the restaurant and approached by a blushing waitress who stuttered as she took our drink orders. I knew the tabloids tomorrow would be interesting ones.

Bella giggled as she walked away. Her eyes shone brightly. I looked down to look at the ring on her finger once more, her hand making circles against her swollen torso. My heart beat faster as I looked at her.

"That wasn't so bad, was it? So they snapped a few pictures..." she laughed. I smiled back at her as I let out a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding.

"Tell me that tomorrow when those pictures are all over the tabloids." I laughed. She leaned over the table seductively.

"Think I can't handle it, Cullen?" she smirked, raising an eyebrow. My face softened as I looked at her. My future _wife_.

"I know you can do _anything,_ Bella." I said, leaning over until my face was inches from hers, my expression a mirror of her own. "I just don't feel like _sharing_ you."

"You'll never have to." she replied, her lips meeting mine. "I'm _yours._"

______________________________________________________________

"Oh, Edward you have to hear this one, this is good." It was a Tuesday afternoon and Bella sat beside me on the front porch, one of Alice's magazines in her hand. The two of us were gracing it's cover.

"'_Edward Cullen spotted in Forks, Washington with mystery baby mama. Is that an engagement ring?'_" Bella snorted loudly. "Baby mama? Really? These people are bored out of their mind."

I laughed along with her. We'd been highly amused by the latest tabloids since that night out. Reading tabloids was something I usually tried desperately to avoid, but Bella got a kick out of them when we passed them at the grocery store or at the gas station. We were _free_ together. We went out and did normal, everyday things. Of course there were whispers, stares and snap shots. But with her by my side, I felt invincible.

Her laughter filled me to the _brim_. It was so strange to see us together in magazines, but at the same time, even as I felt uneasy about it, it almost felt right. Looking at the pictures...we just fit. We looked _happy_. I felt happy. Bella could care less what people were talking about because we were together. Her attitude was starting to rub off on me.

Our families were thrilled to hear of our engagement. My ears were still ringing from Alice's screams of delight. Esme started to cry tears of joy and hugged Bella close, looking up at me with bright eyes. Carlisle was all smiles as the family celebrated. Charlie and Sue came over for big family dinner when Bella and I broke the news. The two of them were just as excited. Charlie beamed with pride as he looked at his daughter and he looked at me with complete trust. He knew I would do_ anything_ for his daughter.

We sat around the table that night, dreaming out loud about the future. Alice ranting about wedding plans and houses for sale. We were all in agreement that we would stay in Forks until the baby was born. When we were on our feet, we'd find ourselves a house somewhere. I saw the light in Charlie's eyes dim at the mention of moving. Bella placed a hand on her father's arm.

"I'll never be too far, Dad." she whispered. The smile returned to him. He could handle any distance we chose, as long as he knew his daughter still needed him. I knew Bella wanted to stay in Forks, and I couldn't agree more. I had come to love this little town. It was a perfect place to disappear in. If needed to travel for work, I'd travel. But I'd never be far from Bella. We were in this together.

As the weeks passed and more pictures began to leak out, the new publicist Alice had hired was going crazy, begging for a story from Bella and I. _"An interview...something!"_

I had been afraid to talk to Bella about it, but when I finally did, she surprised me by saying yes. My Bella, always unpredictable.

Miranda Cole was an reporter I had interviewed with before and I found her to be about as trustworthy as a reporter can get. She had always been extremely respectful and I knew she would be kind to Bella. The morning of the interview, Alice insisted on coming for "moral support," primping Bella all the way there. I chuckled as I watched my fiance grin and bear it, fidgeting in the front seat of the Volvo. _Fiance._ God I loved that.

We were in Seattle now. I was against letting Bella fly to L.A. She was almost 8 months along now and her energy levels were falling more and more. He body was constantly begging for rest. I often found her out cold on the couch with a book propped open on her swelling stomach. Even the road trip to Seattle was one I had hesitated to take, but it was better than a long flight and Bella wasn't letting me off the hook with this interview.

As Bella introduced herself calmly to Miranda, I wondered why I had ever been nervous. Bella had more grace and class in her pinky finger than many of my friends in L.A. had in their entire body. We sat comfortably on the couch beside one another. I wrapped my arm protectively around her as we faced Miranda, ready for the interview.

"So," she started. "Thank you for being with us today, its a pleasure to finally meet you."

Bella smiled sweetly and nodded modestly. She was a natural. Hollywood could use her humility and kindness. And she was _mine_. Miranda caught me staring at my fiance and started to chuckle.

"Well it's not hard to see _someone's_ in love."

"Guilty." I answered, not even bothering to look up at her. My eyes were glued to Bella.

She asked a pretty standard round of questions, to each we answered honestly. Miranda was enchanted with Bella as our story unfolded before her. It was a relief really, to finally just spill the whole thing. How we met, how we got engaged, the events in between, Bella's pregnancy, our future plans. We found ourselves reminiscing as we retold it all. MIranda jotted down notes as her tape recorder rolled. She couldn't stop smiling at us. When our session had ended, she hugged us both and wished us well...a rare gesture from a Hollywood reporter. I had a good feeling as we left the office and headed to the studio for the photo-shoot. We were to be Miranda's cover story on the front of her magazine.

I gave Alice a glare as she pulled Bella away from me and into the dressing room. The hair and make up goons surrounded me, throwing a rack of clothes around and handing me what they wanted me to wear.

When they had finished playing with my face and hair, I grabbed the clothes and snuck into Bella's dressing room. I had seen Alice slip out earlier to grab some coffee and I couldn't miss my chance.

Bella was staring into the mirror. She looked absolutely radiant. Her hair flowed in soft curls down her back and she was wearing my favorite color on her. A deep blue, strapless dress graced her curves and fell to about her knee. The dress accentuated her pregnant belly. Her body was a living work of art. I looked up to see her face in the mirror, exquisite alabaster skin and rosy cheeks.

But the look of confidence that had remained in her eyes all morning was now missing. She assessed herself with critical eyes until she finally noticed me, standing behind her in the mirror. She jumped just slightly, whirling around to see me.

"Edward!" she let out a gasp, followed by a small giggle...the humor never reached her eyes. "You scared me." she smiled.

I walked across the room, closing the gap between us and taking her face between my hands.

"You were _brilliant _today, Bella." I said, kissing her forehead.

"Really?" she asked softly.

"_Really_." I assured her. Her brown eyes remained worried and distant. "What is it, love?"

I felt her blush beneath my hands and watched her fiddle with her dress.

"I'm huge." she laughed only half heartedly. She was trying to hide her insecurities from me, but I knew her too well. I lifted her chin to look into her eyes.

"You are absolutely _exquisite_, Bella. "

"I just...I just want to be beautiful for you." she said meekly.

"There is no one in the world as beautiful as you. No one." I said firmly. I paused and rested my hand on her stomach. "Except you, baby."

With that, I watched as the light returned to her eyes. Just as my lips were about to meet hers, I heard the photographer call out instructions loudly at his crew outside the door. Bella grabbed the clothes off the hangers and helped me dress quickly, buttoning my shirt lovingly and kissing me before we made our way out to the shoot.

We had a hard time keeping the smiles from our face as the lights snapped. Bella was wincing in the kitten heels the crew had given her to wear. Her legs had never looked more luscious, but she was in pain. Her hand was on her lower back in between snap shots. I kept my arms around her at all times, trying to support her and keep her happy. I ended up wrapping the shoot a little earlier, I needed to get Bella home.

By the time we had reached Forks, Bella was sound asleep in the passenger seat. My jacket was pulled over her body and she looked cozy beneath it. I beamed at her sleeping form with nothing but love and pride. _ She changed my life. _

"Edward," Alice said from the back seat. "She's perfect."

I saw her smiling at Bella in the rear view mirror.

"I know." I smiled softly. I reached out to gently touch Bella's cheek. "I know."

**Please review! :) I'll try to update again as soon as I can. It's almost baby time.**


	24. Chapter 24

**BPOV**

I woke up early. I had just emerged from another vivid, colorful dream and my eyes flew open, my hands resting on my giant belly. Giant. Whale. Belly. The last few weeks I had been dreaming about meeting my baby girl. I woke up exhilarated, terrified, happy. It was all so much to feel at once. When I let my senses focus I let out a shaky breath and smiled. I was only _days _away from the real thing.

I could feel her rolling around inside me now, stirring in her own deep sleep. She would be here soon. _So soon. _ For every piece of me that was over-the-moon-excited to meet this little person that had been living within me for the past nine months...there were other pieces of me that were absolutely terrified. Terrified in every normal way I suppose. Any woman about to give birth to their first baby had their fears, their doubts. And there were moments when I lost myself to them.

Every time I felt afraid or unsure, I looked to Edward. Without a word he reassured me. He had faith in me. He_ loved_ me. I felt it in the tiniest moments. We would be snuggled close together on the couch watching I Love Lucy re-runs and I would catch him watching me instead. He looked at me incredulously with this grin that nearly killed me every time. When we went grocery shopping and happened to pass a picture of ourselves in the latest tabloid, he would smile at the picture like...like...he was _proud_ of me. As big as I was, I had never felt so beautiful. All my fear melted away when he looked at me like that.

My eyes adjusted to the dark, raking over my sleeping fiance. _Fiance_. I smiled to myself upon the sight of him. He was stretched out on his back, his head tipped slightly in my direction. The sheets had fallen just below his navel, revealing his broad, beautiful chest, his perfect torso and the small trail of hair that lead down below the sheets. His face was absolutely serene, his mouth only slightly open, his mind lost in a dream somewhere. _God_ he was beautiful.

I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock. It was 4:52 am. Kissing Edward lightly on the forehead, I slipped out of bed and tip toed down the stairs, out onto the porch. The sky was turning a lighter purple as I sat down in a rocking chair. I did this often when I woke from strange dreams. I would come down to think. To feel the perfect calm of an August morning. To be close to my baby. To prepare myself to let go of the feeling of her safe inside me. Because before I knew it, my womb wouldn't be able to shield her from the world. From the clicking cameras or the insane roller coaster that life ultimately was.

And so I sat. Humming old lullabies I remembered from my childhood. Melodies that had flowed from Renee and warbled from Charlie. But as the sun began to peek out from the horizon I felt a small anxiety worm its way into the peacefulness. It could happen _today_. My heart fluttered with excitement and hope and _fear_.

As if he had sensed all of this, I heard Edward's foot steps behind me.

He sat down in the rocking chair beside me and entwined his fingers with mine, raising my hand to his lips to place a small kiss on my knuckles. He was still waking up, sleep lines from his pillow splayed across his cheek, making me grin. I ran a hand through his tousled bronze hair and smiled.

"You alright?" he asked softly. I nodded, taking a deep breath.

"It's going to happen soon, Edward." I said, rubbing my belly, feeling my heart leap as I laid eyes on my engagement ring. So much love. So much promise. "I can feel it."

I really could. I wasn't due for another four days, but I had a feeling I wouldn't have to wait that long. Emmett and Alice had bets going on certain dates and times. Emmett was being so adorable about the whole thing. He tried to hide it sometimes, but he was absolutely ecstatic to be an uncle. His girlfriend Rosalie had come to visit us several times. Though I still didn't know her well, I noticed her face soften when she listened to Emmett talk about babies. He really was nothing but a giant teddy bear.

"Are you scared?" Edward whispered, breaking me free of my thoughts. I almost didn't hear him he spoke so softly.

I nodded. "Are you?"

"Terrified." He said with a smile. His crooked grin was an attempt to lighten the mood, but I could see in his eyes that he was serious. I lifted myself slowly from my chair as Edward pulled me into his lap, wrapping his arms firmly around me. He breathed deeply, his warm breath dancing over my neck.

I lived for these moments.

The media, the lifestyle, all of it seemed like nothing. Miniscule worries in the grand scheme. Life never threw at us more than we could bear. For as long as we were together, we could do anything. I thought back to those weeks without Edward, struggling to make ends meet at the diner and mourning the loss of the Rec Center. Trying desperately to believe I could do this without him. There were no way I could have done it.

I thought often of the Rec Center. I wanted nothing more than to go back to it, to resurrect it, to make it bigger and better. It would be the center of change in that side of town. It could turn everything around and clean up those streets.

After our interview with Miranda Cole, several magazines such as _Ok_, _Star_, and _People Magazine_ had sent Edward and I endless emails and phone calls. They all were offering extremely large sums of money in order to get the first baby pictures. At first I had been annoyed by their persistence and felt immediately protective of my family.

But then I realized that the money could be used for _good_. I spoke with Edward about it when the idea came to me. At first he was hesitant. Anytime I brought up the subject of returning to that side of town, he grew tense. I understood his reluctance. But Edward knew how much this project meant to me. And once Alice and Esme caught wind of it, they had attached themselves to the new project. Once the baby was born and we had settled into a home, The Rec Center would be reconstructed and re-opened. I could hardly wait.

I felt Edward nuzzling my neck and I was brought back to the present. I pulled back to look into his deep green eyes. I saw so much there. The same anxiety I felt, the same excitement for our future, and above all, _love_.

It wasn't long before the house was stirring. Edward and I made breakfast, joined by Alice and Jasper. Emmett was barely awake when he came down the stairs.

"I smelled food." he said groggily. Edward chuckled as he handed him a plate. Emmett had been traveling back and forth from L.A. to Forks. Forks became his weekend get away after the work week.

I hadn't been able to keep from feeling guilty that I was keeping them from their normal lives. But Emmett, Alice, Jasper...they all insisted that they wouldn't miss this for the world. Alice continued to work from the cottage. Emmett traveled back and forth and often worked via satellite as Alice did. And Edward...well Edward wouldn't go back to work if you paid him at the moment.

And I didn't argue with that.

Since I currently wasn't working, I had spent some time drawing up plans for the Rec, with the help of Esme and Alice of course. And when I hadn't been doing that, Alice had helped me shop for the baby room. Thankfully she was patient with me. It didn't take long for me to become exhausted if I spent too much time on my feet. But thanks to her, our bedroom now had a perfect space for our daughter.

Our bedroom in our new _home_.

Charlie and Sue had actually found us a house. After a visit here at the cottage they had driven along the properties by the beach and found one for sale. It was absolutely beautiful. Wide open spaces and beautiful bay windows.

My father had excitedly returned to the cottage and picked up both Edward and I to come and see it. Both of us instantly fell in love. It was a home I had only dreamed about.

A few weeks later, my father came to visit again, this time holding the deed to the house with our names on it.

"_Dad!" I gasped. "How did you...?... b-but..." Tears sprang to my eyes. I looked around at the family surrounding me. Esme and Carlisle smiling knowingly. Alice and Emmett grinning widely. Even Edward looked at me with the same knowing glance. _

_Charlie wrapped his arms around me. I could feel the quiet sob caught in his throat._

"_This is too much, Dad." I said, hugging him. He sighed in my ear._

"_Bella, Bella..." he said. He pulled away to look at me, then to look at the family surrounding me. His eyes returned to mine as he said. "You've worked hard all your life. Too hard sometimes." He looked down at his hands._

"_I've watched you work your way through school, work your way into owning your own apartment. You certainly didn't choose an easy path but you always chose the right one."_

_I started to cry as I looked at my father, whose eyes were also glassy with tears and love._

"_I know you've never been good with gifts, Bells. But you deserve this."_

_I started to speak but he silenced me._

"_Let me do this for you. Let us do this for you. I'm still your dad, Bella. I want to take care of you. You and my grandbaby."_

Though Emmett and Jasper had us all moved in and Alice and I had finished the baby room, Esme was constantly fretting over me as my due date came closer and closer. To ease her worry, we agreed to stay with them at the cottage until the baby was born. Charlie too, had encouraged me to stay with the Cullens. It put him at ease to know that they were there for me. That I wouldn't be alone when I started to go into labor. God knows Edward wouldn't leave my side but someone had to drive us to the hospital and Edward was far to anxious to do it. I had experienced some Braxton Hicks contractions and he had _freaked_ out. He was a nervous wreck. He had me on one arm and our overnight bag in the other within seconds until I assured him it was a false alarm.

After breakfast Alice and I went up stairs. She had become obsessed with making me her barbie doll. At first I felt like she was spoiling me, making me new clothes as often as she could. She assured me though that I was doing her a favor. My pregnancy had apparently inspired her new maternity line.

Today she dressed me in a light summer dress. It was a pale blue with a beautiful bohemian pattern on it. Alice squealed with delight when she saw it on me.

"I'm brilliant!" she squeaked. I laughed as I looked at myself in the mirror. She certainly was brilliant.

She brought me a pair of wedges. She knew I wouldn't wear heels, but the wedges held more support and weren't overwhelmingly high off the ground. I went to step into them, but knew at once by the pain in my lower back that I wouldn't be able to pull them off today. I opted for flip flops instead.

Today was an important day. Charlie had been invited to a new district. He would be keeping his title as Chief of police but was now in charge of a larger area. An area that included the slum part of town I used to live in. Today was his induction ceremony and the family was getting ready to go.

It amazed me how close our two families had become. Sue and Esme were now close friends. Charlie and Carlisle had likewise become close. Sometimes the two couples would go out on the town together, leaving the rest of us with a frozen pizza and a movie rental. It was like we were all teenagers again, but none of us seemed to mind. I was glad to see my father branching out. I was even happier that he was friends with my future in laws.

I waddled down the driveway beside Alice, our arms linked as we made our way to the car. Edward was leaning against the door, his eyes only on me. He was drinking in my body with those green eyes. I shivered, even in the warm August air.

Alice jumped into the passenger side door and Jasper started the car. Edward helped me in and sat beside me. He kissed my forehead and wrapped his arm around me as we sped off towards the town hall.

I glowed with pride as I looked at my dad. He looked invincible in his perfectly pressed uniform, complete with badges and medals for his various achievements. We found our seats as the room became quiet. Cameras snapped pictures of the officers and the mayor began a rather boring speech. I watched Sue out of the corner of my eye as she beamed up at my dad.

I felt my back spasm again as it had this morning when I had put on those damn shoes. I shifted beside Edward and he looked at me, concern in his eyes.

"I'm just uncomfortable, that's all." I assured him as I moved in my seat.

But minutes later the pain returned, stronger, sharper.

_Oh God. It's_....

Just as it finally hit me, sure enough...I felt the sudden burst of wetness between my legs. I certainly had not just peed my pants, which only meant one thing.

Edward heard me gasp and turned to me, his eyes wide.

"Bella..."

"M-my w-water just b-broke..." I stammered. Panic was overtaking me now. I had felt it this morning. I was right. This baby was well on her way. I could feel the intense pressure all over my middle and my belly hardened as another contraction constricted all my muscles. I bit my lip to keep from crying out.

The mayor finished his speech and the room began to clap loudly. Taking this opportunity ,Edward helped me to my feet and to the back of the room. He caught Charlie's gaze. Dad understood immediately and nodded to us. I felt Sue come up behind me.

"Bella, your father and I will go and grab your things. Alice and Jasper will get you to the hospital and we will meet you there, ok?"

I nodded at her, eyes wide with fear. I felt dizzy. Sue stroked my cheek and smiled.

"You're going to be just fine, honey."

With that we were out the door, Edward practically carrying me to the car. I vaguely heard cameras clicking after us and Alice yelling at someone following us. But before I knew it, Jasper revved the engine and I felt the car moving beneath me. _Oh God_. I wanted to be sick.

"Deep breaths. Bella." Edward said, rubbing circles on my back. If it weren't for his voice and his touch, I probably would have lost it right there. I couldn't do this. It_ hurt_.

I started to tremble as another contraction rocked through me. I couldn't help it. I started to cry.

"Edward...I don't know if I can do this...."

He gripped my hand tighter and stroked my face. "Yes you can, baby. I know you can."

My heart beat faster as the car came to a stop in front of St. Anne's. _This was it._

_**Hey guys. So sorry about the wait. Again. :( Hopefully you forgive me. Sorry to leave this chapter where I did, but I really wanted the next chapter to be in Edward's POV. I promise another update as soon as possible. Peace and Love.**_


	25. Chapter 25

**Hey guys :) Here we go....baby time. Please, please don't be upset with the baby name. I chose it because I think its a beautiful name, its the name of a little girl I am very close with... and it sounds really good with Cullen after it. Plain and simple. **

**EPOV**

I vaguely remember feeling Bella's soft lips against my forehead as I heard her rise from bed. I thought maybe I was dreaming at first but sure enough, her warmth faded from my side and the bed felt empty and strange without her there. This had happened a few times before. Bella would wake from strange dreams and as always...her unwavering selflessness kept her from waking me.

I let myself wake slowly, listening to her foot steps. When I heard no urgency in them, I took my time swimming through dreams to consciousness. When my eyes opened I took a deep breath and tried to be still.

Without Bella beside me, I couldn't do it.

So I rose from our little nest of tangled sheets and pillows, stretching my tired limbs and finding my way to the door. I descended down the stairs, listening to the quietness of the house and hearing the gentle squeak of the front porch rocking chairs. I smiled.

_Bella._

I knew she could feel me there. It seemed to become our way. It was as though every fiber of my being was locked into perfect synch with hers. And in moments as quiet as these, we could just _feel _each other.

I sat down in the rocker beside her and kissed her hand. My whole self feeling at peace when she laid her eyes on me and lovingly tousled my hair. Even with the smile on her face, I could tell her thoughts were miles away. Her hand was running continuous circles over her belly.

"You alright?" I asked quietly, wishing to know the thoughts in that beautiful little head.

She sighed deeply, nodding her head. "It's going to happen soon, Edward." she said. "I can feel it." Her jaw tightened just slightly and she looked out at the sky, growing lighter. I could sense her anxiety. It had increased greatly as the due date approached, for all of us.

"Are you scared?" I whispered. She turned to me and nodded yes. Her expression was broken almost. Her eyes showing me how raw and how real her fear was. That look alone frightened me.

"Are you?"

"Terrified." I smiled, knowing I couldn't lie to her. I really was afraid. So many things could go wrong. I was scared for her. For the pain she would feel. For the suffering her body would bear. I was afraid for our daughter. I was afraid for me. What if I wasn't a good father?

As if she could read my thoughts, Bella lifted herself into my arms. Her presence there was immediately calming. We breathed deeply as if one being, without words trying to remind ourselves that we were in this together. That we could be afraid _together_.

Life was just beginning for us. The our baby, our engagement, our new home. I would never forget for as long as I live, Bella's face the day her father gave her the deed to our house. The gift was from all of us, but Charlie had insisted he put down the most money. This was very important to him. It had nearly killed me keeping it a secret from her. But God it was worth it.

I felt Bella's heart beat against my chest, and I knew we would be alright.

The morning flew by. One minute I was sitting with my girl in my arms in that rocking chair, and the next I was dressed and ready to head down to the town hall, watching my radiant fiance waddle adorably towards me down the drive.

And the next I was racing her to the nearest hospital.

I should have known. Bella knew that morning. She could feel it. As soon as she started to shift beside me during the mayor's speech, I began to worry. She had tried to assure me she was just uncomfortable, but hearing her gasp again, I knew better.

"Bella..."

"M-my w-water just b-broke..." She stammered, eyes wide with panic. As soon as the crowd began to clap, I had Bella in my arms and headed towards the back door, making urgent eye contact with Charlie.

Sue assured us she and Charlie would be there shortly and I followed Alice and Jasper to the car. The cameras that had been documenting the ceremony were now distracted. Two started to follow us to the car, immediately attacked by Alice, who thankfully scared them back into the building.

I helped Bella into the car and jumped in beside her, Jasper revving the engine and peeling out of the parking lot. Bella's breathing was increasing and mine was following. She was leaning forward, gripping the back of the passenger seat.

"Deep breaths, Bella." I began to rub her back, feeling totally helpless. I felt her whimper beneath me as a contraction tore through her. I could feel her body tense, her muscles contracting. My heart broke as Bella turned to me, shaking with tears she couldn't hold back. She was scared. She was _so_ scared.

"Edward...I don't know if I can do this..." she cried.

"Yes you can, baby. I know you can." I replied, trying to reassure her.

Before I knew it we arrived at the hospital. St. Annes wasn't necessarily a place filled with happy memories for me, but I hoped that today would change that. The last time I was here, Bella had been a broken body under pale sheets and blood stained bandages. It was hard for me to remove that image from my mind. Fear was beginning to swallow me.

I raced to find Bella a wheel chair, wheeling her into the lobby up to the front desk when I did. The woman at the desk smiled at us widely. As nice as she seemed, I really wanted her to stop pretending everything was okay and get my fiance into a hospital room as soon as possible. What is it with nurses? Always so smiley and calm. It was enough to drive me mad. I could barely speak.

"Hi, I'm Edward...and I...uhh this is Bella - she- she- water...broken. My baby..."

"I'm Bella Swan," Bella spoke up from her chair, wrapping her hand around mine and giving it a squeeze. "I'm one of Doctor Mallory's patients."

She stopped to breathe through a contraction, her entire body trembling. And yet she did not cry out. The nurse hurried through some files and pulled up some paper work.

"Mr. Cullen, I'm going to need you to fill out some quick paper work while we get Bella into triage."

"What? No, I'm going with her..." Bella squeezed my hand.

"It's alright. It will take you two minutes. I'm just going to be down the hall."

"But I -"

She pulled me down to kiss her, smiling up at me as she pulled away.

"Its ok, we still have a long way to go. You won't miss anything." she looked up at my sister. "Will you help him out, Alice?"

I watched helplessly as a nurse wheeled Bella away. Alice snapped me to attention as she grabbed the clipboard and caught the attention of the nurse at the front desk again. She put a pen in my hand I raced through the damn sheet, checking boxes and filling in all the blanks as I heard Alice speak quickly in a low voice about giving Bella the upmost privacy. We had cleared it all with the doctor as she learned our situation and we were promised a very private room and no press involvement whatsoever. Alice made sure to remind the staff.

I slapped the clipboard onto the desk as soon as I had scrawled through the last blank line and marched my way down the hall to triage. The nurses, sensing my impatience, stop staring wide eyed at me and led me to Bella's bed. She smiled weakly as she saw me enter. I sat down in the chair beside her and immediately found her hand. She had changed into an all too familiar blue gown. It was too big for her small frame and has slid down one shoulder, exposing her beautiful skin.

"That wasn't so bad was it?" she laughed softly, her thumb stroking my cheek. I couldn't even laugh, I was so on edge. I placed a gentle hand on her stomach, afraid even my touch would hurt her.

"Are you doing okay? Are you comfortable, did the nurses - do you need anything?"

"Edward." she said softly with a smile, quieting me. "I need you to kiss me. And then I need you to take a deep breath. You're making me nervous." she laughed. There was still pain in her expression, but to see her smile made the oxygen start returning to my lungs. I took her face between my hands and brought my lips to hers, ever so gently. It would never cease to amaze me how perfectly our lips moved together. As instructed I took my deep breath and sat down again beside the bed. I could see she was trying to remain calm, but the fear in her eyes was still very present and her eyes were brimming with unshed tears.

It didn't help that whoever was two beds down from our little curtain cubicle was screaming bloody murder. Bella's eyes widened and she became pale as she heard it. I needed my arms around her. Sitting on the edge of her bed, I encircled her in my arms, feeling her choke down a sob.

"It's gonna be okay, Bella..." I was trying to remind myself the same thing. I was absolutely_ freaking_ out inside. But Bella needed more from me. She needed me to be strong for her. "It will be over before you know it, and she'll be here. She'll be in your arms, _safe_ and happy." I felt Bella's tear stained cheek raise just slightly in a smile against my neck.

"Edward..." her voice squeaked as she pulled away to look at me. "I need you to tell me I can do this. I - I'm...I'm _scared_."

I cupped her sweet face with both of my hands and looked her firmly in those big brown eyes.

"You can do this, Isabella." I said softly but genuinely. I never pulled my eyes away from hers, willing her to see in them my faith in her. My faith in our future. If nothing else, I needed her to be sure of my love.

A older woman in a white coat entered through the curtain, breaking us out of our gaze.

"Ah, Ms. Swan, Mr. Cullen." she said brightly. "Today is the day it seems!" her voice sang. Bella squeezed my hand tighter. I listened to the woman prattle on in medical jargon and watched her feel up my fiance. Doctor or no doctor, I was still highly uncomfortable.

"Well, for now it's a bit of a waiting game." the woman said. "Your at about 5 centimeters dilated right now. I'll be back to keep checking on you throughout the day, Dear." She gave us a toothy smile.

The doctor had the nurses escort Bella and I into our room. Alice and Jasper finally found us, Charlie and Sue now with them, as well as Esme and Carlisle. Bella's smile brightened but became apologetic when she saw her father.

"Dad, I'm so sorry...your ceremony..."

"Oh Bella please...Nothing could keep me away from this! I'm going to be a grandfather!" he smiled. I watched his eyes brighten wildly at the word _grandfather_.

"What did the doctors say, Bella?" Sue asked. Bella explained her current condition and we all settled in for a long wait. Thats all people ever seemed to do at a hospital. Wait and Wait and WAIT. My nerves were shot.

Bella was being a soldier, breathing through her contractions without even a sound, her eyes focused only on me. In between contractions she had started up a game of gin with Alice on her bed. The distraction was a much needed one and it helped the hours pass.

The nurses visited often to check Bella's progress, but usually their visits were short. It worried me that they weren't more attentive to her, but then again what did I know? If it were up to me, they would be here waiting on Bella hand and foot.

It was around 3:00 in the afternoon when Sue went out for a bit, returning with food for everyone. Bella couldn't eat, which worried me. Her contractions were becoming closer and closer together. It took all of her energy and focus to get through them. Even thinking about trying to eat food made her feel sick. In between contractions now she tried to sleep, closing her eyes with pure exhaustion. We were both anxious to meet our baby but she was only 7 cm dilated. I barely touched my sandwich, letting Emmett finish it. Rosalie had come to visit and was presently occupying his attention out in the waiting room with the rest of the family, who took turns coming in and out of the room to check on Bella.

It was early in the evening when things finally started to get moving. My heart was pounding in my chest every time Bella began to tremble through a contraction - they were now barely minutes apart. I knew they had become more painful because now she could not help by cry out. I finally began to get nervous and called the nurse.

I was sure I saw her roll her eyes at me, but when she checked Bella, sure enough...

"Well, it looks like you're ready to start pushing Bella. I'll go get Dr. Mallory and we'll get you all ready."

Ready to push? Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy _shit_. I turned to look at Bella, who was taking deep, labored breaths, her eyes closed. I saw a tear fall down her cheek.

"Bella..." I whispered, nuzzling her cheek. "She's almost here. It's almost over."

Her head lolled to the side to look at me. She was utterly exhausted. And now she had to push. She was crying out of utter lack of strength.

"I'm _so_ tired...I'm so tired, Edward." she cried. Her sobs became louder as another contraction ripped through her body.

"I know, baby I know." I said, stroking her hair. This _was_ almost over though right? I thought back to Esme talking with Bella about her pregnancy with me and each of my siblings, trying to remember what she said. She said she was in labor for about six hours and she pushed for....two? TWO HOURS? PUSHING?

"_Yes, two hours. But it is different for all women. Some women it only takes two pushes, others it could take even longer than the two hours I endured. It all depends."_

Good God. I felt sick with worry.

Nurses began flooding the room and the chaos was enough to send me over the edge. There was so much movement all at once. To them it was quick routine, but to me...it all just made me frantic. I looked to Bella and I could see the same panic in her eyes as the doctor made herself comfortable a the end of the bed between her legs. I held her hand tightly.

And then the hard part began. I thought I was going to pass out.

"Push, Bella!" the nurses order, counting down from ten in loud obnoxiously hyper voices. I could see Bella's every muscle straining, her grip on my hand was like iron. I was praying to God that this would be quick.

I lost track of time, completely consumed by the intensity of the moment. I couldn't count how many time Bella had pushed before I heard...

"She's crowning!"

My heart was in my throat, thick with excitement. I could see her. I could _see_ her.

"Bella, she's almost here. Just a couple more pushes..."

Bella looked up at me, gasping for air, her hands blindly reaching for something to hold. She clung to my shirt as she pushed again, determined. The strength in her eyes making me feel nothing but _pride_. The nurses' voices got higher in pitch, telling us, she was almost here.

And then ....she cried.

Music to my ears. The noises and the lights, the endless movement, all came to halt as soon as I heard my baby cry. It was as if nothing in the world had ever made sense until this very moment.

I felt my breath hitch in my throat and my eyes well up as they lifted her into the light. I couldn't move.

"Would you like to cut the chord, Daddy?" the doctor sang happily.

_Daddy._ I'm a daddy.

I looked down at Bella, collapsed back into her pillow and grinning from ear to ear up at me. Her chest was heaving as she fought to catch her breath. She squeezed my hand and nodded at me, urging me forward. The nurses showed me what to do as they swooped up the baby into blankets, roughly rubbing her eyes and suctioning her nose and mouth. They quickly weighed and measured her. Eight pounds, seven ounces.

It was utterly surreal. I leaned down and embraced Bella, who despite how weak she was, hugged me tightly, kissing me everywhere. My forehead, my cheeks, my nose, my lips. We were both leaking tears of joy and relief.

And then they put her in Bella's arms.

Nothing in the world could be more perfect. The sight of my girls, meeting for the first time...took my breath away. How was this _real_?

Just when I thought things couldn't be more incredible, it was my turn to hold her. She was a bundle of blankets and tiny fingers and toes, whimpering softly in my arms. And then her eyes opened, looking up at me for the first time, and she _stopped crying_.

We stared at each other with equal fascination and love.

"What are we going to call her Edward?" Bella asked softly, looking up at us with adoration.

We had tossed around different names over the past couple months, never really finding one that fit. Finally we decided that we would know when we met her. So we waited. Waited and waited and waited. For this moment. I looked down at my daughter and thought of all those names, remembering one I knew Bella had been fond of. As soon as the name crossed my mind, it attached itself to the being before me. I was unable to see anything else.

"Lily." I said, smiling widely. Bella grinned up at me, nodding. I carefully sat down beside her in bed, the nurses invisible to me. Bella snuggled next to me, head on my shoulder, peering down at Lily.

"Lily needs a middle name..." Bella said, her voice in adorable sing song as she looked at her daughter.

"How about Marie, just like her beautiful mother?"

"Lily Marie Cullen." Bella breathed. "I like the sound of that." She smiled up at me. Her eyes held so much joy even though I could see she was completely spent. I kissed her forehead lovingly. I was sure that there was no one in the world who could feel love as fiercely as I did right now. I knew without doubt that Bella was my soul mate. And the tiny being in my arms had only known me for minutes, yet I would lay down my life for her, and for her mother.

The nurses trickled out after cleaning up Bella and making her comfortable. It didn't take long before our excited families replaced them. The oohing and ahhing commenced. Both Bella and I reluctantly passed around Lily, who met her grandparents and her aunts and uncles for the first time. As much as I loved all of them, what I wanted more than anything was for them to disappear and let me be selfish, keeping Bella and Lily all to myself.

Esme knew me too well. She hugged me warmly and winked at me.

"Its been a long, hard, _beautiful _day, Edward. Your girls need some rest, especially Bella." Sue came up behind her and embraced me as well. "We grabbed your overnight bag, so the two of you should be set for the night. We'll be back in the morning to come and pick you up and take you three home."

I giggled as Carlisle practically dragged Alice away from Bella and the baby. He kissed Bella warmly on the cheek and guided my reluctant sister towards the door.

"She's beautiful, Edward!" Alice cried, squeezing the life out of me in her vice grip hug.

Emmett gave Bella a hug good bye and followed the rest of the family out the door, his face softening as he looked back at the baby. Bella was absolutely right, he was nothing but a giant teddy bear. He gave me a bear hug and slapped me on the back, tucking a celebratory cigar in my back pocket.

"Congratulations my man." He said,winking and taking Rosalie's hand and heading out.

It took Charlie a little longer to leave, but Sue was good about giving Bella her space and lovingly dragged Charlie out the door, promising to return tomorrow.

I breathed a deep sigh of relief and shut the door behind them, staring at Bella who was slowly rocking Lily back and forth. It was dark out. Lily was born at 7:22pm. It was now almost 9.

I kicked off my shoes and slid into bed beside Bella. She was struggling to hold her head up, she was so tired, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from Lily, who was snoring gently in her mother's arms.

Bella turned and handed me the baby, resting her against my chest. Turning in bed, she snuggled into my side, kissing my neck sweetly and resting her head on my chest. She was eye to eye with Lily, stroking her round, pink cheek.

Just as her breathing began to even out, Bella jerked awake again, trying so hard to keep her eyes open. I laughed at her softly and kissed her forehead.

"Sleep, Bella. You're exhausted." she laughed against my chest.

"Only if you sleep with me."

The nurses had set up a makeshift bed for me beside Bella's. I had been too distracted by my beautiful baby to tell them not to bother.

My place was beside Bella and no where else.

I rose quietly, placing Lily in her basinet and rolling the cart as close to the bed as possible before I slipped back under the covers. This time I was able to completely encircle Bella in my arms, hugging her close to me, kissing her sweet face. My lips found hers and all I could think was how _blessed_ I truly was.

"I love you, Edward." she said. I sighed contentedly.

"You have no _idea_ how much I love you, Isabella."

She smiled and clung even tighter to me.

"Love you, Lily Marie." she whispered. My heart soared. I whispered the same to my sleeping daughter as I felt Bella drift off beside me, cradled safely in my arms.

**AWWWWWW. Big, mushy, gushy, fluffy love chapter. Makes me feel all toasty inside. Will update when I can :) PLEASE REVIEW!**


	26. Epilogue

**Hey you guys! So sorry for the long wait. I really, really, really appreciate your patience. This is going to be the last chapter of You Don't Have to Hide. It's sort of an epilogue. I had a few people ask about a sequel...and the truth is, I have absolutely no idea. If the story comes to me, then you shall have it. But if not, there are plenty more ideas in my head for other stories, so if you enjoyed this one, add me to your author alert if you'd like. My semester is done in a week or so, and summer time provides plenty of good writing opportunities. So, definitely expect to hear more from me :)**

**Peace and Love always. ~hippie.**

**BPOV**

I found myself on the front porch. _ Our_ front porch. Sitting in the giant love-seat swing that hung down from the ceiling and watching the earth wake up slowly. The sun just peaking out over the horizon. It flooded the back yard and lapped at my feet, illuminating Lily's sand box and washing over her plastic shovel and pale. She was two today. Two whole years old.

I smiled at life. Here I was sitting on the porch in the early morning. The same way I had the day she arrived. I felt warmth in my heart as I thought of it. I felt that same warmth spread to my cheeks as I thought of my beautiful, _naked_ husband, fast asleep upstairs. I gripped my coffee mug a little tighter, grinning widely as I laid eyes on the empty paint cans lining the front porch and remembered the night before.

"_Come on, Lily. Let's get you cleaned up." I giggled, passing her to Edward. I watched as a goofy, proud grin swept over his face as he opened his arms to her. She squealed with delight at the sight of her father's smiling face. The three of us were absolutely covered in finger paints and the sun was about to go down. _

_Lily wiggled her little form as we went upstairs, still squealing and giggling as Edward made faces at her and kissed her cheeks. I started a hot bath and made quick work of cleaning up Lily. Edward kissed my cheek and went downstairs to clear up the porch. _

_I couldn't believe how big Lily was getting. Esme didn't lie. Time like this flew by so fast. I paused to hold my daughter a little tighter in my arms as I dried her off in a giant, fluffy towel. The beautiful thing about Lily was, she hugged me back. The more I got to know the little being Edward and I created, the more I knew she was unlike any other. Even at this age she was so perceptive. She loved deeply. When either I or her father were upset or stressed, she found her way to our laps. She'd burrow her face into our neck and hold tight to us. She made it so easy to love. _

_I felt Lily yawn against my neck and found my way to the nursery room. She'd had quite the evening and it didn't take long for her breathing to become deep and heavy. I tried to remember being a kid, water logged with happiness and warm bath water after a day of play. Yeah, I'd be tuckered out too. I kissed her forehead and whispered good night before finding my way downstairs to help Edward. _

_I couldn't help but giggle as I found him bent low to pick up some paint brushes, his perfect ass on display. _

"_Hey stranger." I said, letting my eyes roam over him. I watched his head turn in my direction with a grin before he straightened his back and turned to meet my eyes. Although my eyes were still locked on his back pockets. His chuckle brought me to the present._

"_Are you checking me out Mrs. Cullen?"_

_Against my will, I blushed. He still did that to me. He never ever ceased to make me feel like a school girl. Mrs Cullen. God life was good._

"_Maybe..." _

_I bit my lip, trying to suppress another girlish giggle as he closed the gap between us, wrapping his arms around me waist. I brought my hands to his cheeks, both covered in Lily's smeared hand prints. _

"_You are quite the work of art, Mr Cullen." I said through laughter that now flowed freely from my mouth. _

"_You are looking like a master piece yourself, my love." His laughter dwindled but his smile remained as his eyes poured over me in adoration. I felt his fingertips on my cheek as he brought his mouth to mine. His mouth. God, his mouth. _

_Soft, warm and perfect on mine. Moving slowly, sensually against my mouth and then...against my neck. I felt myself exhale heavily as his lips worked their magic on my skin. My hands found their way to his perfectly, messy hair as I brought his face to mine once again. _

"_Bella," he breathed, before kissing my fiercely. I felt his fingers trace the skin on my hips, exposed by my disheveled shirt. At the sound of my name on his lips I was undone. I leapt into his arms, my legs wrapping around his waist. I felt his laughter hum through his body and tried not to squeal with delight as I felt him hurrying to the stairs, carrying me upwards. _

_We were careful to quiet our laughter until we made it inside our bedroom and had the door closed safely behind us. Our clothes disappeared quickly as we pushed our way into the master bathroom, pressing our bodies together against the door, the walls, the shower glass. Our laughter only fueling our playful lust. _

_I felt Edward's warm, wet mouth on my neck as I haphazardly reached out and turned on the water. The shower humming to life with a warm spray against the sliding shower door. I reached my hand out blindly to test the temperature before dragging Edward inside with me. _

_I could not be without him. I pulled him flush against me, feeling every inch of him on my skin. We were made to be this way. His tongue, sweet and soft dance with mine before blazing a trail down my neck, over my collar bone, and finally to my breasts. His hands roamed over my curves...as well as in between them. _

_My hands too roamed wildly. Losing themselves in his hair, down the broad expanse of his muscular chest, and down further still until I could feel him gasp against my skin. _

_I felt him move us backwards until my back was against the cool tile of the corner of the shower. The temperature causing me to hiss and arch my back, pressing my chest against him. I could feel how much we needed each other as he pressed himself against me. And then...into me. _

_Perfect harmony. _

_He moved flawlessly within me, whispering love into my ear. His mouth never far from my skin. My name rolling off his lips. _

_And when finally the wave of pure pleasure hit us both, I smiled against his neck, watching beautiful finger paint twirl down the shower drain. _

_Truly a masterpiece. _

The blush on my cheeks at such a memory grew impossibly deeper as I heard foot steps behind me. My beautiful, naked husband was awake. I turned to see him standing there, unfortunately no longer naked. He wore long flannel pajama pants. His chest still bare. In his arms was Lily, who was perfectly cozy in his embrace. Her head rested perfectly in the crook between his neck and shoulder. She was still sound asleep.

"You're up early." I whispered. Edward's dazzling green eyes fell upon mine with a sleepy grin. Once in a while, when I had a restless night, I would wake early and sit out here on the porch. I thought he had grown used to it.

"You know I can't sleep without you, Bella." I blushed. Again.

"I'm sorry." I said softly as he sat down on the swing beside me and began to rock. He quieted my apologies with a soft touch to my cheek.

"Restless sleep?" he asked. He knew me well. But this time things were different.

"Actually, no." I answered. He looked at me with questions in his eyes. I laughed quietly, "Truth is, I was too happy to sleep." I reached up and ran my fingers through his hair, placing a kiss on his neck. I felt him shiver beneath me and smiled.

I stroked Lily's round cheek. "Two years old. God... I can't believe it."

Edward looked down at Lily and then back at me, humming in agreement. "Neither can I." he said. His gaze turned serious for a moment as he looked at me. "Then again, I can't believe a lot of the things that have happened to me."

His eyes traveled over my face with love.

"I don't know what this life would be without you, Isabella. And I don't know what I would do without her." he said reverently, smiling down at Lily.

I felt my eyes well with love as I looked at him. My family.

"I love you, Edward." I said. "Forever."

I saw his eyes well up too as he smiled back at me. "And we must have done something right to deserve her." I said, looking down at our daughter.

She stirred, yawning widely and blinking awake.

"Hi, sleepy girl." I whispered. Lily smiled up at me sweetly.

Sometimes I was afraid this was all too good to be true. I worried constantly in the back of mind that some how life might take this away from me. I would fight forever to keep this. To keep my family safe and happy. I would face whatever fate would hand me. And I knew I wouldn't face it alone. Edward felt the same way.

We were extremely blessed.

My father once talked to me about something called the law of abundance. It was the week after we brought Lily home and he had come to visit.

_Charlie sat in the new furniture, Lily tucked safely in his arms. He rocked softly, pride written all over his face. _

_Edward was sound asleep upstairs. The baby had had a restless night and he insisted on letting me rest. When the morning came I made sure he stayed in bed. He was so exhausted. We both were. But somehow we took care of each other. _

_Charlie had stopped by to visit, anxious to see his granddaughter. _

"_How you holding up, Bells?" he chuckled. _

"_I'm doing alright, Dad." I replied. "I mean, Edward and I are both exhausted beyond belief. But I don't think we have ever been happier."_

_Charlie smiled knowingly. I looked down at Lily, sleeping peacefully, finally. I had never been more in love. _

"_It's all so much, Dad. I'm the luckiest person in the world and I don't know what to do with myself. It's like I've been given this amazing gift and I have no idea how to say thank you."_

_Charlie sat up straighter in his chair and looked at me. _

"_You and Edward are very lucky, Bells." he started. "You've made it through a hard road. But here you are."_

"_But it's all so much. I have my own house, a beautiful man who loves me, a family, a daughter..." I was starting to get choked up. "I'm just so happy, I'm afraid it will go away."_

"_So share it." he said simply. I looked up at him confused. _

"_Sometimes we live with our hands closed tight around the things we want. Our own happiness. We're afraid to let it go. But it's all about balance, Bells. Live with hands open and you'll find it. You and Edward have a lot to give the world. And you have the power to make a difference. The Rec Center, Edward's music, raising Lily. It's the law of abundance. Share the wealth, kiddo." He winked._

I remember telling Edward about the conversation that night. After that day, we began to live with our hands open. Edward's music filled the house, and at night when Lily was asleep I would draw up plans for the new Rec Center, making calls and talking to Esme.

I felt like maybe if I lived to do good, then somehow, I would deserve even a fraction of the joy I was given.

So the days passed. Lily grew and so did we. The Rec was remodeled, bring new excitement to town. Since Charlie's district had expanded, the police force had been whipped into shape. Slowly but surely, the light was coming back to the dark side of Forks.

The Rec was a dream come true. I called Rita and she helped me rebuild what had once been, ten times better. I wanted her to be a part of this. She and I became partners, and together we opened the doors to the new building.

The grand opening was a day I would never forget. I had Lily tight against me in the summer air. She was dribbling apple juice down her chin and being her adorable self. We had made a beautiful space outside for a giant picnic. Complete with petting zoo, balloons and of course...Emmett had made sure it was fully catered with all of his favorite home cooked foods.

Edward was especially nervous that day. Before the grand opening, he had organized a benefit concert. He used his image well in order to get people to attend and to donate. I bet none of them expected him to be so talented. I had heard Edward play many times, but I had never been more in awe of him than that night.

And I wasn't the only one. The day of the grand opening, a record producer had promised to meet with Edward. By the end of the day, he was signed with the label and beaming joy.

I worked at the Rec Center as often as I could. Lily by my side more often than not. The new Rec had a beautiful day care center and Lily was finding new play mates everyday.

Edward's music was taking off. His concerts were all to the benefit of different charities. Esme was always finding a new cause, inspiring Edward to put out more music. He never travelled too far from home. He couldn't bear it. If he had to travel, he took us with him. I loved to watch him play. And nothing could describe how happy I was to see his face after a concert. He looked...complete.

Alice, who had become my dearest friend, had been itching to plan our wedding. When things had gotten settled we finally let her. What I thought would be a horrendous ordeal, turned out to be a perfect day.

Alice was never pushy or controlling, excited maybe but never a nightmare. She knew Edward and I well and put together the most exquisite wedding we could have ever asked for.

_Our backyard had been transformed completely. It was the most beautiful time of day. _

_Twilight._

_I stood at the gate, looking forward at the small gathering. Alice had set up a small gazebo, alight with beautiful white bulbs and decorated with white orchids at its base. The yard was aglow. Not only with the light from the gazebo, but soon, the fire flies came out to join us. I looked to see Esme standing beside Carlisle towards the front of the little assembly, holding Lily, who was looking up at the little fire flies in wonder. It was just our family. I smiled at Renee and Phil, happy to see them fly in from Phoenix. Emmet and Rosalie smiled brightly at me, next to a bouncing Alice and serene Jasper. Some of my closest friends from the Rec Center had arrived as well. _

_I looked up to see Mrs. Faye beaming at me from her wheel chair. I could feel my eyes well with tears already. _

_And then my eyes fell upon him. Standing under the beautiful lights, in a crisp, beautiful, black tux. And his eyes were only on me. _

_Suddenly, there was no one else in the world. _

"_It's time, Bella." I heard my father say, taking my hand..._

I was brought back to the present as I felt Edward kiss my forehead. Smiling brightly, I followed him and Lily inside. I watched as she rubbed her eyes and pressed a palm to her daddy's face. He laughed and pretended to gobble up her little fingers, earning him a loud laugh from the little girl in his arms.

I caught up with them and wrapped my arms around both of them, as far as I could reach.

"I love you." Edward said. kissing me gently.

"I love you too."

I knew life would bring more obstacles, that the balance my father spoke of would work in ways I could never imagine.

But if nothing else, I was going to live with gratitude and forever _love_ fiercely.

**Thanks so much for reading :) Love always finds a way. **


	27. Author's Note

Hello friends!

Wow...it certainly has been awhile. I cannot tell you how amazed and grateful I am that this story is still being read, reviewed and added to favorites. I am absolutely honored. Since I am unable to be writing at the moment (RL is absolutely mad) I wanted to pass along a story I beta that belongs to a friend of mine.

This Heart Renewed by orchidmoon22.

You won't be sorry if you go read. It absolutely melts my heart and I have enjoyed working with her on it. What I love about fanfiction is not only the pleasure of reading, but also the support and community that lives here. I wanted to support my friend, and I truly hope that you guys will too.

Have a lovely day and happy reading! :)


End file.
